Tag Archives: San Diego

Camping the Big Sur Coast & Friendship.

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along the Big Sur Coast

along the Big Sur Coast

Sometimes I get caught up in my day to day events and feel they are so important and I don’t take the time to be thankful or grateful for this moment in time. Then I find out a friend of mine is fighting for her life and it throws everything back into perspective again. I thought I would take some time out of my morning chores and business and be thankful for this day, my health and remember those who struggle. I decided to write on the blog. After all, it is called “Journeys of Thankfulness”.  Although my trip last summer is over, my journey into gratefulness is not.

Janet & Diane at Point Loma

Janet & Diane at Point Loma

Two weeks ago my friend Diane, from Vermont (remember her helping me to drive across the covered bridges of VT and NH?), decided to escape the cold and the snow and head west to visit me in sunny southern CA. Funny how friends show up at the right times in my life. I have been mostly content with life now, although still missing Jim so much at times. I have been stressed a bit about life and then Diane shows up. People seem to arrived just when I need the company and a boost. I love friends. It is so good to have them in my life.

Beach Kind of Morning

Beach Kind of Morning

Right after Presidents Day we decided to pack up the RV and drive north to the Big Sur Coast of CA. I have done a lot of traveling alone and I really enjoy it yet it is so much fun to have a good travel companion. Diane and I have had our adventures over the years, backpacking the Rockies is one, and now we continue to find more to do together. The weather was perfect, the scenery grand and the company magnificent. And through all of the activity it also was relaxing. I think I might have sold Diane on RV camping as well.

I had to throw in a photo of a Sea Otter, They are so cute.

I had to throw in a photo of a Sea Otter, They are so cute.

One of the best things about long time friends, no matter how far apart we are, we pick up right where we left off the last time we talked or saw each other. And so we did. It was a marvelous 5 day trip of remembered times and creating some new moments along the way. We hiked into the hills, slept among the redwoods, and wandered the beaches and it was so much fun. I don’ think I have laughed so much since before Jim died. I guess I had forgotten how serious I have become sometimes. I need to stop this, really. It is good to have friends who can help you remember to lighten up (and the elephant seals mating on the beach helped too).

I want to thank Diane for coming to visit. It is good to get out of my normal routine and remember how special the world is. I am an adventurer and I love to explore the natural world, books, knowledge, my internal growth and the wisdom of others. It is good to take time to remember and value what I have. I am glad I stopped this morning to remember all of person-kind and value what I have in this day. Today I am thankful.

Today I will call a friend and let them know I remember them and thank them for loving me. Here is to good friends.

Diane & Janet Toasting Friendship & a Perfect Holiday on the Big Sur Coast.

Diane & Janet Toasting Friendship & a Perfect Holiday on the Big Sur Coast.

 

If you would like to see all the photos from this trip here is the link.

Journeys of Thankfulness

An Adventure of Another Sort….The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship

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Daniel & Janet Awards Breakfast

Daniel & Janet
Awards Breakfast

This morning, with the support of my good friend Tammy, we went to the Grossmont and Cuyamaca College Scholarship Awards Breakfast.

You may ask, why was this an adventure? I elected to introduce the recipient of the Jim Fenningham Memorial  Scholarship this morning. I know, I am up in front of people all the time when I am “on the tour bus”, but this is way different. I had to speak in front of people in a whole different way and it took courage for  me to do this.

I did well. I reminded myself to do what I do all the time and that is relax and speak from the heart. It helped to introduce such a good young man with an abundance of enthusiasm for his chosen career path. Not only have I gotten to know Daniel a little but now I feel like a bit of Jim is with him also. How delightful.

Tammy, Daniel, Janet

Tammy, Daniel, Janet

It was also very good to have Tammy with me. She was the person who suggested a scholarship in Jim’s honor instead of a memorial service that even Jim would not have wanted to go to. I appreciate her unwavering support any time I ask for it. She loved Jim and I know she loves me. I could have thought of no one better to sit next to me and take the photos while I presented this award. I am grateful for her ongoing friendship.

Over twenty scholarships were awarded this morning. The awards went to all ages and ethnic backgrounds and they honored many different areas of study. I admit, I was not sure that this morning would be interesting, so I was pleasantly surprised to find myself attentive and interested in this breakfast. It gives me such hope to see so many students moving through adversity of all sorts to get to a place where they excel in their fields of study. These students represent all of our future and it is good to know they are there, interested and actively involved in their pursuit of education and learning. Many of their stories were  very touching. It was an honor to be there and to support them and to know that this will be an on-going role for me.

I am going to include a copy of the essay that Daniel wrote to win this award. He is seeking a career in acting. The scholarship this semester was awarded in the Theater Arts. Jim acted, danced, juggled and performed. He loved anything to do with the theater. Next semester it will be awarded to a student seeking a degree in the social sciences. It is exciting to be a part of this process.

Enjoy the essay. I did.

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                                                                               My Dream

I am a Mexican-American low-income student living in the United States pursuing
an undergraduate degree. I was raised in Tampico, Tamaulipas Mexico to Mexican
parents, but my mom had the great vision to give birth to me in the U.S so I could have
more opportunities, and so I was born in McAllen Texas. Her decision to have me in the
States was the best decision she could have make because thanks to that I am now
here pursuing my dream of becoming an actor. I lived in Tampico until I was 18 when I
came to San Diego for my senior year. The plan was to come and graduate to here to
have more opportunities and to decide if I wanted to study in the U.S. or go back to
Mexico. After a year here I decided a wanted to stay, but first I had to ask my uncles,
whom I lived with, if I could stay for college. They said yes, and my parents supported
me with whatever decision I made. I stayed and would later payoff because of my
career choice.

I think that by just being in the United States studying is a great personal
achievement. My family is still in Mexico and I just get to see them during summer and
the holidays, and I think that is the biggest sacrifice I have made in my entire life. The
obstacle of being separate from my family is worth it because I am fighting for my
dream. As I already mention, I want to be an actor and I want to pursue a Bachelors
Degree in Theatre or a BFA in acting. I want to transfer to Cal State Long Beach to get
my degree and keep moving forward from there and start building my acting career. I
still have left at least a year at Grossmont, but looking forward to it to see what other
great acting classes I can take.

Besides of having a full-time schedule; I am in Grossmont’s touring show, which
tours around elementary schools around San Diego. We have rehearsals Tuesdays and
Thursdays from 8 to 11 am, and even though it is early I am always excited for every
rehearsal because of the great purpose of the touring show, which is taking theatre to
the children. I am very proud to be involved in this great project and I try to give my best
everyday even in rehearsals and help my fellow actors with whatever they need. I am
excited to be in this play because it’s my first play ever, but I am especially excited to be
in a play so kids with Mexican heritage can know that there is an opportunity in theatre,
and I wish to inspire Mexican-American children to fight for their dreams.

For the last two years attending Grossmont I struggled with commuting because I
didn’t own a car and took me two hours to get to school. I recently got a car but there
are other expenses that this scholarship would help me with. My parents help me with
what they can, but I will find the way to keep studying here to follow and accomplish my
dream. If I am selected for this scholarship it would be a big step forward in achieving
my short term goal, and help me fulfill my dream and motivate me to keep moving
forward.

Janet & Daniel Officials of the college & the district

Janet & Daniel Officials of the college & the district

To support this scholarship, please make checks payable to:
Foundation for Grossmont & Cuyamaca Colleges (FGCC)
Mention that the contribution is for The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship
Mail contributions to:
Selam Gebrekristos
Scholarship Specialist
Financial Aid Office
8800 Grossmont College Dr
El Cajon, CA 92020-1799
Tax Deductible Contributions per section 501 (c) (3) of the IRS Code; EIN 45-2692818

One Year Tomorrow

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Aolani

Aolani

Sunday, November 17th, 2012 eighteen good people took Jim’s ashes to sea. Jim had requested being buried in the Pacific Ocean and so on an incredibly beautiful, sunny day we took him to sea. We sailed on the Aolani, a 58’ Sunchaser American Catamaran with a wonderful crew.

The week prior to this sailing I worried. It was a blustery and cold week here in San Diego and we had rain. They were predicting rain for that Saturday So I fussed and worried. On Saturday morning I got up and the sky was filled with clouds and sun. We were a go. At 10 am The Aolani sailed with all 18 on board. Even my 88 year old mother-in-law, Dotty, went out front and sat on the rigging. As we set sail the clouds disappeared and the sun shone down on a glassy, quiet ocean. It was amazingly beautiful. Sailing out the boat was accompanied by 2 dolphins and it was perfect.

Barbara & Henry

Barbara & Henry who helped make this day happen.

Beth singing Simple Gifts

Beth singing Simple Gifts

Reaching past Point  Loma the motor shut down and we all improvised a ceremony to say farewell to this kind and wonderful man. Therese read a song in Japanese. Beth sang Simple Gifts. Cynthia handed out carnations which we tossed into the water with the bio-degradable urn that held the ashes. Henry emptied a bottle of Guinness Stout and Dotty tossed a small bell that Jim had been given at his birth. I like to think that the Dolphins now have that small bell.  Jim’s best friend, Brian and I floated the ashes out to sea. Everyone that was aboard that day felt the specialness of the occasion. It was a very unique moment in time, fitting for Jim who was a unique being.

Drew, mom, Judy, Janet, Beth & Michael

Drew, mom, Judy, Janet, Beth & Michael

Therese reading

Therese reading

Mom

Mom

 

After we said farewell we went inside and ate chocolate. This was also fitting for the man who loved good chocolate. For two hours, on one day a bond was formed by everyone who was present on board this catamaran. We shared in a perfect moment in time. Even though it was hard and melancholic it was also perfect. I could not have been with a finer group of people. Their support was and still is so lifting and loving. I am loved by good people and I honor them.

Brian preparing to send Jim out to sea

Brian preparing to send Jim out to sea

floating on a calm sea

floating on a calm sea

When we returned to port Dotty and my sister-in-law, Judy started the drive north. They got about one  hour north of San Diego and were in the rain for the rest of the trip to Los Angeles. Ah, there was the rain we were expecting. It made me feel like we were surrounded in a bubble of perfection that only could have been here and on that bay for that one day.

I wanted to share with you this event in my life and the lives of the eighteen that rode with me. Everything except the boat ride was unplanned and spontaneous. It became a perfect farewell to a good man. By the end of these two hours at least two people planned to changed their will because this was so beautiful and  right. Was everyone there that wanted to be? No. I feel that those who needed to be on board the Aolani that day, were there.

I have been emotionally all over the place this past week. When the anniversary of his death was marked a month ago, it was not hard. I have been experiencing so many different emotions over this past week. I miss Jim. I miss his voice, our conversations, his arms and the fun we had together. I carry him very close at times as I am settling into this new lifestyle. I am allowed to miss him and I am allowed to move on. I can do all this  at the same time and it is OK. After I met him I never expected that I would be by myself so soon again. And yet, here I am. And I am doing OK. And I miss him.

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Today I am thankful for the perfect moments I have experienced in my life. I am so thankful for my friends and their on-going love and support. I am more fully human right now than I have ever been before in my life. And…so are you. Jim is now swimming with the dolphins. When I go to the Pacific I see him everywhere and that is good. I hope somewhere someone is ringing that small bell.