A few days ago guess who appeared at my doorstep? Janet! Yes, she walked through the front door, I wonder where she came from. Do any of you know? It is hard to understand people. They come, they go, and then they return again. Mandy, my top person does that frequently. And…she takes Rocky (he’s a dog) with her. Then just like that, she is back again.
Sometimes I get to stay at my house when Mandy disappears. I can sleep on my comfy bed, look out the window, watch the birds, and sleep as much as possible. Oh, I also love to eat. Other times, with much difficulty, Scott and Meghan, Mandy’s family, take me to their house. Once I am there I am fine but trying to catch me and put me in a small case and drive me there, well let me just say it does not bring out my finer side.
When Janet shows up I get to stay home. Ooh, I like that. It has taken me a few days to get used to her being here again. After a few days, I have adjusted. After Mandy left I went in and out of Janet’s room. I sometimes slept on Mandy’s, Rocky’s, and my bed. Then I would slip into Janet’s room for part of the night. Today I decided to just move into her room and stay. The other day I forgot to get up. I slept in until sometime in the afternoon.
I love people. I love people who pet me and feed me and well, just love me. Janet does that very well. She comes in when I am sleeping and picks me up, throws me over her shoulder, and walks me around the house. I like that. I just can’t seem to get enough of snuggling and loving.
I have Janet trained. When she goes into the kitchen I follow her and meow with the sweetest meow I know. She gives me treats. I really really like treats. She sometimes says she is not going to be fooled by me but that sweet meow works every time.
I am excited to have Janet here. She brightens up my life. It is good to have the unexpected happen. When the unexpected comes to visit it shakes up everyone’s life. It is good to have my life shaken up a bit from time to time. It is good for most beings to have their lives shaken up once in a while.
Well, it is time for a nap. Did you know that kitties need at least sixteen hours of sleep a day? Our beauty rest is important. That is why I look so good all the time. That is why I have the finest tail of any kitty I know.
Continue to expect the unexpected. It makes life exciting.
“It’s strange how deserts turn us into believers. I believe in walking in a landscape of mirages because you learn humility. I believe in living in a land of little water because life is drawn together. And I believe in the gathering of bones as a testament to spirits that have moved on. If the desert is holy, it is because it is a forgotten place that allows us to remember the sacred. Perhaps that is why every pilgrimage to the desert is a pilgrimage to the self.”
Terry Tempest Williams
The desert is hot and dry most of the year. There are many things that can poke, scratch, and hurt quickly. Many of the creatures also have the ability to hurt. There is little water. When it does rain much of the water runs off into arroyos, ditches, and gulleys. The ground does not quickly absorb the moisture. Everything that lives in these places has figured out how to conserve water and find food. Desert Big Horn Sheep only need to drink every three days when the temperature is above 100 degrees Fahrenheit.
In this southern California desert, it gets confusing. Here it is hot, it is dry, and yet thanks to the Colorado River and rich soil, Imperial County (in the California Desert) is a breadbasket for this country. The ranchers grow iceberg lettuce, leaf lettuce, broccoli, cauliflower, cantaloupes, honeydews, dry bulb onions, processor onions, carrots, sweet corn, spinach, spring mix, and watermelons. During this trip, I have seen fields of hay and flowers.
All this growth makes it hard to comprehend this area is a desert. When you get away from the fields everything goes back to dry and hard land. There are still more surprises in this desert. I went for a hike yesterday and found an oasis. There were palm trees and other riparian plants growing in this one small area. As I got closer I found water and signs of deer, desert bighorn sheep, and other animals. Life is busy where there is water. Animals, amphibians, and birds know where this water is. It is their lifeblood.
Yes, the desert is hard. I discovered the desert when I moved west in 1976. The wide-open spaces, the silence, and the ruggedness drew me to the desert. The flat land is rugged and so are the mountains. I found I loved to explore this landscape and get to know it. I understood that I had to come to the desert on its terms. Its silence and beauty awakens me in a way that no other place can. I need to be aware of so much here. This awareness lets me relish being in the moment.
I came to the desert after Jim died so I could grieve and the desert understood. There were times that I became hard and brittle like this place. I had to confront all sides of myself and I walked out alive. That alone is an accomplishment.
I return to this environment each year to remember and explore and let myself be absorbed in this amazing place once again. Yesterday’s surprise was a small oasis, teeming with life. The next time it might be another slot canyon or a dry waterfall that demands me to climb it. I have learned to lift the rocks and stones away from me when I want to see what is under them. I have learned to walk carefully and be careful of the Catsclaw ( a very thorny shrub that has destroyed more than one pair of hiking pants and a tent). I am still learning about all the spikey, pokey things. I am careful of the animals and creepy crawlies. Respect is taught in a place such as this.
My time is quickly drawing to a close. It is getting too hot for me and I am beginning to feel parched. The dentist is also calling me back to San Diego. Hopefully, I am at the end of this dental event.
I will return to this rugged formidable land again and again. I love all the deserts that I have seen. The California desert is amazing. Yet, have you ever seen southern Utah and northern and southern Arizona? Each area is so different and so desert. I am grateful to have been introduced to this land, to this amazing landscape, and to the desert.
Today I am thankful for my time near the Salton Sea. It has been good to be reunited with friends. It has been good to reunite with this rugged, wonderful environment. The Desert.
What to do between dental appointments. There are so many choices. I guess I could have stayed in San Diego yet I am a traveler and a nomad.
How can a desert lover resist the pull of the desert? I chose to go to Salinas and the Monterey area in February when I would usually be out in the desert for the winter. It was time to change it up. I swear I could hear the desert questioning why I wasn’t there. It lures you in and the hold is strong.
Last Friday early, I climbed into my rig and headed to eastern California to kayak in the desert. Yep, you heard me right, kayak in the desert. It is a strange thing to think of water in a desolate and dry land and yet there it is.
The Colorado River begins high in the Rocky Mountains. It meanders its way southwest, through Colorado, Utah, Arizona, and then rides along the border of California and Arizona before it would empty into the Sea of Cortez. It is the lifeblood of the west. Water is like gold. It is fought over and protected in a land that is often dry and forbidding.
Since it supplies water to such areas as Phoenix and Southern California the Colorado water is managed. Dams have created a playground in Southern California and Arizona right in the heart of the desert. Where one would not expect lakes, they are plentiful.
I met a friend of mine, Cori, at Squaw Lake, and on a perfectly sunny, not too warm day we took off to explore the lake and a small section of the Colorado River, where the currents can be surprisingly strong and sneaky. We kayaked for close to 4 hours in this unique land. Cori and I talked and weaved our way through “The Nile” and eventually made it to the river. It was a perfect day, perfect company, and a perfect kayak.
We have both moved north to the Salton Sea, a dead accidental sea in the middle of the southern California desert. Not much lives in it as it is extremely salty. On the east side of the Salton Sea, there are hot springs. The Fountain of Youth RV Resort & Spa is a winter attraction for those who live in the northern United States and Canada. It is warm and pleasant in the winter. The days warm into the 80’s Fahrenheit and down to the ’40s at night.
I have friends from Michigan and New Mexico staying here for the winter. After a Covid year off it is good to meet up with everyone again. We all own Roadtreks. Owning one of these RVs has certainly added to my life in my ways. I have met and become friends with so many good people.
I have been walking and soaking in the pools and hot springs. This morning I went to Yoga. I spend much of my time alone so it is nice to visit with such good and dear friends. After almost two Covid years I have to practice being social again.
I am here for another week and a half before the dentist once again lures me back to San Diego. Sigh. The good news is I am almost done with the dentist.
What’s Next? I have no idea. Plans will take shape as spring emerges. Meanwhile, I am enjoying my brief time in the desert this year. I am enjoying my friends.
Today I am thankful, for the desert, for tried and true friends, and that I can take my kayak almost anywhere and find water to launch it.
Today I realized that my month in Salinas, CA is almost up. It feels like I just arrived when in truth I have been here for three weeks. Time has a way of slipping by.
What have I been doing with my time? What spectacular places have I discovered? How is the whole house-sitting thing going? What is next and next and next?
Here are some of the things I have been doing with my time in northern California.
I have discovered the Elkhorn Slough. The Slough is in the center of Monterey Bay and is managed by the Nature Conservancy. One can hike or kayak and bird watch in and around the Slough. I have taken full advantage of it’s close proximity to Salinas. I think I will kayak for an hour or so and then three hours later I am returning to my put in at Moss Landing, hungry and happy for a day on the water. And, oh the wildlife I have seen. It is definitely a place worth exploring.
The Monarch Butterfly Sanctuary in Pacific Grove was alive with Butterflies. By the time I leave on March first the butterflies will also be migrating. I am glad I saw them. It is a special place.
Calla Lily Valley at the north end of the Big Sur Coast was in full bloom. After enjoying the lilies I made my way out to the beach and admired the beautiful Pacific Ocean.
Wineries abound in this area. I spent my first Saturday afternoon at the Folktale Winery, tasting wine and listening to good music.
I have done a lot of walking around Salinas. I have enjoyed looking at the well cared for and lovely homes in the neighborhoods.
I have explored the coastal communities. I have been in and out of several state parks and explores some of the local wildlife refuges. I love being outside and exploring the natural settings.
And then, there is Woody the Cat. He is a darling boy who I am glad to have met. This cat craves affection. He snuggles with me every night. I have found him sleeping next to my face, on my head and under the covers. He is a delightful boy, a charming personality.
My bicycle has two new tires and is tuned up for another season. It rides well. It is always good to find the good bike shops in town.
Although not submitted, my taxes are complete. This is the first year in many years that I have done my own taxes. Turbo Tax made it relatively easy. My “accountant” Cynthia (not offically my accountant) will review them with me before I submit them. It is good to have friends who understand accounting and are willing to help. I am thankful for Cynthia’s help.
I could go on but as you can see my time, even when I am in new places, is a mix of adventure, and getting things done. It is no different than yours. We go have fun and then we do taxes.
Where to next? I am returning to San Diego for most of March. My dentist and I have an ongoing relationship of many years. I am returning to San Diego to once again get involved with dental work. Oh joy. I once told Jim, my husband that he should have checked my mouth before he married me. With his usual roll of the eyes, he laughed and proceeded to love me, no matter what.
Today I am thankful for the opportunities that continue to gift my life. I am thankful for the dentist. I am thankful for Woody. Today I am thankful.
Where has the time gone? I have been in San Diego for over two months. All my medical and dental care is done and I am ready to venture out. Am I going to the desert? That is where I usually go in the winter. Change is in the air. I am departing later this week for Salinas, CA.
I have another house and kitty sitting adventure for a month, while a friend of mine goes off in her Roadtrek to visit with friends and plays in the desert.
Salinas is near Monterey and the Pacific Ocean. I am looking forward to kayaking and biking opportunities. It is good to explore new places. The ocean becomes more rugged as one adventures into northern California. I love to be around wild water.
I am so excited to be around kitty again. Mandy tells me that Woody the kitty is very friendly and will most likely sleep with me. Ooh, I am thrilled! I am ready to enjoy a cat. It has been over two years since Miss Elsie went on walkabout. It will be so good to be sharing space with a kitty again.
After being stationary for a while it takes a bit of organization and planning to get ready to get “on the road” again. My rig has been washed, waxed, and detailed. I have had the opportunity to fix small things that needed fixing. She has been cleaned and is ready to go.
All things that have been moved inside the home where I am staying, thank you Cynthia & Ward, have to be moved back into my tiny home. Everything has to find its place. All the details of moving again can be a bit overwhelming. I find if I move things into the RV a little at a time it becomes more manageable and things find their places easily.
I have to figure out where I will be camping. That is not as easy as it used to be. Due to Covid more people are camping now and finding reservations at state park campgrounds and even private campgrounds is more challenging. Thankfully I have Harvest Hosts and Bonndockers Welcome memberships. I really enjoy these alternatives to campsite competition. I usually meet delightful people on these camping adventures. Sometimes I get to sample wines when I stay at Vineyards for the night.
I want to take a moment to thank Cynthia and Ward for their continuing hospitality. Cynthia and I started as friends. During the first year of Covid, they lovingly took me in. We spent almost nine months living in the same house together. Our friendship grew and when I finally departed it felt like I had left family behind. This year they were giving me a place to stay while my rig was in the shop. What started out as a week’s stay became two months. I will miss them when I depart. I appreciate their ongoing hospitality and loving support. Good friends are indeed a treasure.
As I prepare to move, I invite you to join me in the unknown adventures that lay before me. Please, come along for the ride.
Today I am thankful for friends, my little rig, and opportunities that continue to be offered to me.
Fall represents a time of coming in. The harvests are in and hopefully, people are celebrating a bounty. The daylight hours shorten. It is a time of coming in, physically inside, inside the heart, inside the mind.
When October arrives I begin to brace myself for the journey through Jim’s birthday, October tenth. Jim (my husband) died in October 2012. The day before his birthday was his last hospital admission. Then my birthday arrives, October sixteenth. October seventeenth in the early evening hours, my husband of twenty-one years died. On November seventeenth we took his ashes to sea on a glorious San Diego morning.
Each year I wonder what this period of time will look like. Will I want to be with others? Will I want to be alone? Will I celebrate my birthday? It took me two years after his death to celebrate my sixtieth birthday. Will I be sad or grateful for this time in my life?
This year I found myself wanting to be alone and settle with my heart. It was a quiet day on Whidbey Island, where I was house sitting. I decided I really did not want to take phone calls. I was in a good and quiet place and I wanted to savor that time and the contentment I felt.
I still have a small amount of Jim’s ashes, ready to be given to the Rocky Mountains, when I get there. Three weeks before my house sitting gig was finished on Whidbey Island, I took two teaspoons of the ashes to Callahan Firehouse Glass in the town of Langley and had a memorial pendant made. I did not want a pendant for my neck, I wanted something larger so he could ride on the mirror in my rig. I gave them my order and told the artist to be creative.
Just before I left Langley I picked up the pendant. The woman who creates this artwork was at the store to give me the pendant. She told me that she does ceremonies around each pendant she creates. She spoke with Jim while blowing the glass. And remembered the stories I had told to the woman who had taken my order.
The pendant is beautiful. The blues in it match his eyes(light blue) and his Modern Morgan Kilt(darker blue). The white that sparkles through are his ashes. Now Jim gets to see my world. When the sun hits it just right there is a diamond flare of light that hits the bottom or top of the glass. I think it is Jim winking at me.
This feels like another step in the continuation of moving forward and embracing my life. This year there was a settling in, a feeling of comfort within myself that has not been there since he left.
And, speaking of Jim…Today is Giving Tuesday. When Jim died, with the help of Grossmont College where he worked most of his adult life, I created a scholarship in his name, the Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship. These scholarships help students afford to attend college and create careers for themselves. I have met a few of the students and each semester the college sends me a letter that the student who was awarded the scholarship writes. When I read these essays it gives me hope for the future no matter what the age of the student
If you would like to donate to Jim’s Scholarship today or any time please do so. Here is the link to the Change Makerssite. Change Makers are students that achieve if supported. If you donate today the scholarship will receive double the amount of your donation. I already did my yearly donation earlier in the day. In the memo section type in Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship so that the donation will be directed to the appropriate area. It is a good time to donate. Remember that tax season is right around the corner.
I am feeling grateful for another year. I am glad that I allow myself to adventure into my feelings, good or bad. Each year I see my own growth and am thankful. I am thankful for the time I had with Jim. I am thankful that I am still here and growing. Today is a good day.
A hero is a person who is admired for great or brave acts or fine qualities. People need heroes because heroes save or improve lives by inspiring others. Heroes have the ability to turn others into heroes as well.
A few days ago while I was traveling in Oregon I met Pebble and Dick. They were standing on the jetty in Newport, Oregon bird watching with their spotting scope and binoculars. Dick had all the latest gadgets so he could take iPhone pictures on the scope. They were avid bird watchers. Did I forget to mention that Pebble and Dick were just short of their ninetieth birthday? Pebble had fallen while out birding four years ago and broke both her ankles. Yet here she was standing tall on a cold day. I also noted how they have continued to embrace and change as technology has advanced. Just because one ages, doesn’t mean they have to be stuck in the past. As with anyone they continue to grow and change and learn.
I used to hike with the Sierra Club while living in San Diego. It was the Wednesday in the Mountains group. Most hikers were retired and moving at a pretty good pace. Paul was close to ninty and was still hiking (most often in the lead) and every year traveled to Mexico to teach ESL to students.
Another man in this group had hiked the Grand Canyon each decade. When he was reaching his ninetieth birthday he had to cancel his hike because his son was sick and needed someone to help him out.
Many years ago I was a regular attendee of Quaker Meeting. Sitting in silent worship and waiting for the voice of God to speak through you was not always an easy task. I started attending Meeting for Worship because of a man I was dating. I stayed a long time after the relationship had disappeared. The quality I admired in most of the attendees was their call to action. They didn’t preach about what needed to be done, they were active in their beliefs. If they felt called to help refugees coming across the southern border, they were helping out. One woman spoke about her experience in Nicaragua sitting with a child whose father was kidnapped by the rebels. They thought the wife and child would be taken too. Someone stayed with the mother and child twenty-four hours a day. If they were taken while people sat with them it would then become an international incident, not just one more disappearance.
I must not forget the nurses, doctors, firemen, policemen, teachers and other civil servants who put their lives on the line every day to help the rest of us maintain a good and positive life.
All these people and many of my friends are my heroes. There are so many out in the world who help without being noted in the paper, on the news, or anywhere else. There are many very fine people in this world who through their actions and beliefs change my life and your life for the better.
These everyday heroes, inspire me to do better, to be kinder, more patient, and loving towards others.
Today I am thankful that I can recognize the everyday hero when I meet one. Today I am grateful to meet those who inspire me and help me to create good in my life. I am thankful for heroes.
I left Whidbey Island in the middle of June shortly after Sandy and Jim arrived home. The night before I left I introduced them to my little song sparrow. By the end of daylight, it was sitting on Jim’s head and singing. I felt I left this bird in good hands.
Throughout the month that Sandy and Jim were home the relationship with this song sparrow continued. Sandy told me that as the time came closer to them leaving for their next campground hosting job they began to dissociate from him as they were concerned about how he would get along when the house was empty.
Robyn and Tom, the next-door neighbors, said they saw this charmer once about a week after the owners had left for their next hosting job in Yellowstone National Park. Then the bird was on his own.
I returned to Whidbey the first week of August. I arrived late in the afternoon, put my things down, and went out to the deck to see if a little brown sparrow was still about. Sure enough, just like that, there he was, singing and chitting just I like I had never left. I was so happy to see my bird. I felt like I was greeting a good friend.
Things were different between me and this sweet little bird. He no longer sat on my head and was often more comfortable sitting on the post near me and chitting rather than singing. One day I noticed he had only one tail feather. The next day both were gone. I was worried. I researched song sparrows and molting online. Sure enough, he was molting. It took very little time before the new tail feathers appeared and grew. Sparrows and most birds molt twice a year, once in the spring and again in the fall.
His colors are more muted now and not the orangey-brown of springtime. He sings less often. Some days I see him once early in the day and not again. Other days, if I had been out and about I might not see him at all. Two Saturdays ago, my friend Melissa was visiting. He came into the bushes near where we were sitting and chatted to us for quite some time. When I tried to approach him he flew away. Sigh
The next morning I went out on the deck to find him and welcome him for a visit. He was not there. It felt different. He had left. Then I noticed there were no sparrows around at all. The White-Crowned sparrows had disappeared. All the sparrows were gone. The Chickadees, Nut Hatches, Finches, and other birds were there and plentiful but not a sparrow in sight. What had happened?
Do sparrows migrate and where do they go? I put a post on Facebook to the Birders in the Northwest region and discovered sparrows migrate to Texas and southern climates for the winter. I assumed my bird friend was on his way south to stay warm and find plenty of food and maybe a mate.
Five days later he returned along with three other song sparrows. I was still in bed when I heard a familiar song out in the back and there he was along with his buddies. My heart was glad. I was immediately up and down the stairs to welcome him back. He remains a bit more distant. His singing has returned and it was a delight to welcome my sweet little birdy friend back to my Whidbey Island life. I am told that when they molt they disappear into the bushes.
The seasons are beginning to hint at change. I know he must go. I am glad that I have let him be a bird. I have not hand-fed him or encouraged him to be anything else other than a little wild bird who has welcomed me into his circle. One time I found a large dead moth and presented it to him as a gift. I have never seen him so excited. He looked down onto the bench where I had laid it. He snatched it up and disappeared into the brush to enjoy a meal.
I don’t know how long he will be here. I see less and less of him now. Often I will hear him early in the morning. I am immediately up and outside to say hello. Some days he is not here at all. When he does come it is usually early in the day.
I am glad I have had some practice at his not being here. It is a bit hard to admit that I grieved for this little bird when he disappeared for those five days. Next time I hope I will buck it up and wish him well and send him on his way. However, I have to remember if this little bird was human I would feel the grief of loss just like when a friend moves away or stops communicating.
By allowing me into the circle of his life he has become more than just another little brown bird. He has become my friend. I feel blessed to have been chosen by this little bird. I have learned a lot about myself and life through this unique and special friendship. There is an unspoken yet very recognizable responsibility when one becomes friends with another. It is important to nurture these friendships, no matter how long they may be in one’s life. The value of friendship is what makes a being unique and special in my heart.
I have spent a lot of time outside and have had time to observe and breathe nature. Many birds come to the feeders, each one is unique. I have witnessed the change of seasons from early spring into fall. The circle of seasons in the yard is special to be a part of. The birds have gone from their spring glory of color to more muted colors. They sing less now. The hummingbirds disappeared for about two weeks while nurturing their young before they returned to the feeders again. My sparrow has grown from a young bird into full maturity. Often he sings for the joy of it, but it is also a way to get the girls to notice. As these little birds come to the feeders I have allowed them to recognize and trust a safe environment. None of them except one little brown song sparrow allowed me to become more intimately involved in their natural life.
I will treasure this moment of time in my life. This wee little bird crept into my heart and opened it to experience the joy of friendship in this somewhat lonesome time. (Covid) It has been a joyous and welcome respite.
Oh yes, truly, today and every day I am so grateful for moments in time that awaken my heart. Today and all days to come I am thankful and so grateful for this sweet little Song Sparrow who happens to be my friend.
Flowers are amazing. Have you ever taken the time to really look at a flower? It goes beyond color and shape, although these are interesting features as well. Each part of a flower has a purpose. There are common flowers we see every day. There are weeds that grow in the wild. There are flowers and then there are FLOWERS.
Since I have been on Whidbey Island in Washington State I have been enjoying flowers I have not seen in years. When I first arrived the early spring flowers were blooming. Daffodils and Tulips abound. Just at the end of that season, the Rhododendrons began to bloom. Oh my, they were beautiful. They continued to bloom week after week. in the middle of Rhododendron season, the Lilacs started to bloom. I have favorite flowers and Lilacs are pretty close to the top of the list. Their fragrance and colors are delightful. When I was in high school my father and I would drive to abandoned farmsteads and pick lilacs, fill the car and bring them home. Oh, how I love those flowers.
When I arrived back on Whidbey Island in early August there were new flowers at the roadside stands. Another favorite flower has arrived. Dahlia season is in full swing. They are so unique. Dahlias come in all shapes and sizes. They can be huge or small. Their petals are perfectly formed. The colors are wide-ranging. They are beautiful flowers. It is not uncommon on my walks or bike rides to see Dahlias in almost every yard.
Around this time of the year, I think of my Mom. My Mom loved her gardens. There was an Iris garden and a Rose garden. There were the early spring flowers in every garden. From early spring until late fall something was in bloom in our yard.
My Mother was eighty when she died, shortly after Labor Day. When my sister, Ruth, and I arrived at our family home in Delaware, we helped my Dad plan my Mother’s funeral.
When it came to choosing flowers for the casket the florist was willing to work with us. We went into the backyard to see what was in bloom. The Dahlias were in bloom. My dad took great pride in growing some of the largest Dahlias I have ever seen.
We cut Roses and other flowers in bloom in our yard. The featured flowers were the beautiful Dahlias. The display on top of my Mother’s casket was a generous and beautiful display of late summer and fall flowers from the garden. It was personal and touching. Every time I see Dahlias it brings back a special memory of my mother and our family’s tribute to her.
This spring and summer I have been enjoying the multitude of flowers that exist where there is water. I have enjoyed the long seasons of several flower groups. I like walking outside and seeing luscious colors. I especially love seeing the Dahlias in bloom. It gives my mind a chance to wander to my Mom and treasured moments in time.
Monday I went in search for rhubarb. Did you know that Washington State is a prime producer of rhubarb? I did not know this but as I drive or bike around the island I have noticed the Rhubarb for Sale signs at the end of driveways. I love rhubarb. This rhubarb search started because of a recipe published in the New York Times for Vanilla Bean Rhubarb Cobbler. There is rhubarb growing where I am house sitting but not enough.
I have been feeling a bit lonely and out of sorts for the past few days. I have been feeling sorry for myself. I find it hard to be solo in a society that favors couples and relationships. This is not my world. I am not sure what my world should be. Covid has made me even more confused and lost. This was my mood as I ventured off to find rhubarb.
My day changed. My attitude shifted.
My first stop was a farm stand with a coffee stand, produce and plants for the garden. The two women behind the coffee cart helped me weigh out the rhubarb. We chatted and laughed. I ordered a cup of coffee and then discovered this was a brand new enterprise, having only been open for two days. We talked about living in an RV and house sitting. They were so kind and helpful and my attitude shifted with this momentary conversation and feeling of worthiness. Happily with rhubarb in hand, I departed.
My mini-aventure in happiness and self worth continued.
I am having a major issue with my refrigerator door. It kind of fell off because of broken plastic parts that have worn with time. Buying a new door is expensive. I am a do it myself kind of woman and I have decided that I want to try to fix it. I have been studying this door and thinking. Today since I was near Home Depot I thought I would walk in with my door in hand and ask some of the experts.
I was standing in the aisle with all the nuts and bolts and doing the Home Depot stare. The stare was something I learned from Jim and I often notice it on people, especially men in these kind of stores. Now I do it too.
This man in an orange top was walking down the aisle. I assumed he was an employee. I stopped him and started to ask for his help. He said he was busy and left. A few minutes later he returned and asks me about the door. I showed it to him and explained the problem. I need to figure out some way to secure the door and replace or fix the broken parts. He looked at it for a few minutes and came up with a suggestion. The first idea didn’t pan out so we started talking it through again and he came up with a great idea and even better, one I can do myself.
I took a close look at him and realized he was not wearing a Home Depot employee vest or work uniform. He had an orange safety vest on. I said to him “you don’t work here do you?”. He smiled and said no. He works contract for the military in Oak Harbor. He said that people often mistake him for a employee of Home Depot as he frequents the store as part of his job. Sean and I had a great conversation and he figured out a solution to the issue at hand. He made my day. I was so surprised that he came back to help me. The smallest interactions sometimes offer the greatest rewards.
I now have a plan and hopefully the door will be fixed within the week.
Since I was in Oak Harbor and had not really visited this part of the Island I looked at a map and figured out how to take the backroads close to the west side of the Island on my return Greenbank. I discovered Joseph Whidbey State Park. Every State Park I have been to in Washington is very pretty. This park did not disappoint. I hiked a short trail to the beach and started to stroll up the beach. As I walked by a family, two adults and two children, the woman got up, with mask in place and asked me if I was looking for agates. They proceeded to show me all the agates they had found and told me it was a hobby that everyone enjoyed. She guaranteed that I would find some. Well she was wrong, however, I was given the gift of another momentary interaction that made me feel unique and worthy.
I have my rhubarb and a plan of action for my refrigerator door repair. I certainly have a much better attitude and outlook than when I left home this morning. Sometimes the smallest interactions are the mightiest. I came home feeling happy after a fun-filled day of small interactions with other people. My self worth had increased and I currently find no traces of my morning attitude. It helped to be out in nature for part of the day. I saw some new birds which is always exciting. I have also discovered another park that I would like to go back and explore more. Maybe I will find an agate.
Today I am thankful for the unseen guidance that puts me in the right place to receive what I need at this moment in time. Today I am grateful for all the tiny moments given to me by others to brighten my day and my awareness. Today I am Thankful.