A Change in Attitude

Monday I went in search for rhubarb. Did you know that Washington State is a prime producer of rhubarb? I did not know this but as I drive or bike around the island I have noticed the Rhubarb for Sale signs at the end of driveways. I love rhubarb. This rhubarb search started because of a recipe published in the New York Times for Vanilla Bean Rhubarb Cobbler. There is rhubarb growing where I am house sitting but not enough.

I have been feeling a bit lonely and out of sorts for the past few days. I have been feeling sorry for myself. I find it hard to be solo in a society that favors couples and relationships. This is not my world. I am not sure what my world should be. Covid has made me even more confused and lost. This was my mood as I ventured off to find rhubarb.

My day changed. My attitude shifted.

My first stop was a farm stand with a coffee stand, produce and plants for the garden. The two women behind the coffee cart helped me weigh out the rhubarb. We chatted and laughed. I ordered a cup of coffee and then discovered this was a brand new enterprise, having only been open for two days. We talked about living in an RV and house sitting. They were so kind and helpful and my attitude shifted with this momentary conversation and feeling of worthiness. Happily with rhubarb in hand, I departed.

My mini-aventure in happiness and self worth continued.

I am having a major issue with my refrigerator door. It kind of fell off because of broken plastic parts that have worn with time. Buying a new door is expensive. I am a do it myself kind of woman and I have decided that I want to try to fix it. I have been studying this door and thinking. Today since I was near Home Depot I thought I would walk in with my door in hand and ask some of the experts.

I was standing in the aisle with all the nuts and bolts and doing the Home Depot stare. The stare was something I learned from Jim and I often notice it on people, especially men in these kind of stores. Now I do it too.

This man in an orange top was walking down the aisle. I assumed he was an employee. I stopped him and started to ask for his help. He said he was busy and left. A few minutes later he returned and asks me about the door. I showed it to him and explained the problem. I need to figure out some way to secure the door and replace or fix the broken parts. He looked at it for a few minutes and came up with a suggestion. The first idea didn’t pan out so we started talking it through again and he came up with a great idea and even better, one I can do myself.

I took a close look at him and realized he was not wearing a Home Depot employee vest or work uniform. He had an orange safety vest on. I said to him “you don’t work here do you?”. He smiled and said no. He works contract for the military in Oak Harbor. He said that people often mistake him for a employee of Home Depot as he frequents the store as part of his job. Sean and I had a great conversation and he figured out a solution to the issue at hand. He made my day. I was so surprised that he came back to help me. The smallest interactions sometimes offer the greatest rewards.

I now have a plan and hopefully the door will be fixed within the week.

Since I was in Oak Harbor and had not really visited this part of the Island I looked at a map and figured out how to take the backroads close to the west side of the Island on my return Greenbank. I discovered Joseph Whidbey State Park. Every State Park I have been to in Washington is very pretty. This park did not disappoint. I hiked a short trail to the beach and started to stroll up the beach. As I walked by a family, two adults and two children, the woman got up, with mask in place and asked me if I was looking for agates. They proceeded to show me all the agates they had found and told me it was a hobby that everyone enjoyed. She guaranteed that I would find some. Well she was wrong, however, I was given the gift of another momentary interaction that made me feel unique and worthy.

Searching for Agates

I have my rhubarb and a plan of action for my refrigerator door repair. I certainly have a much better attitude and outlook than when I left home this morning. Sometimes the smallest interactions are the mightiest. I came home feeling happy after a fun-filled day of small interactions with other people. My self worth had increased and I currently find no traces of my morning attitude. It helped to be out in nature for part of the day. I saw some new birds which is always exciting. I have also discovered another park that I would like to go back and explore more. Maybe I will find an agate.

Today I am thankful for the unseen guidance that puts me in the right place to receive what I need at this moment in time. Today I am grateful for all the tiny moments given to me by others to brighten my day and my awareness. Today I am Thankful.

Updates & Plans

I am now three weeks out from my Radioactive Iodine treatment. It was much harder than I had anticipated, yet I am doing well and recovering on my own timeline. I now have to remind myself it is time to figure out how to get back to normal, whatever that is. Each day I am a little less tired and I begin to think about the future at least a little.

I have been getting questions from friends near and far, regarding how I am doing. Now that February and the first two weeks in March are over, I am realizing that I can begin to consider my future. I still deal with tinnitus but after a visit to my acupuncturist, Gayle the humming is a bit quieter. I appreciate that the birds don’t have to compete for my attention so much.

I am officially not glowing however, the Radioactive Iodine will continue to make it’s way out of my body for eighty days. I can still set off Geiger Counters and alarms at the borders. I have a card I need to carry with me until mid-May that I present if I am stopped anywhere. I will probably set off alarms if I drive into Arizona. I continue to do what I need to do to stay healthy. Drinking a lot of water is still first on the list. Getting enough rest is another.

I still have to wait until early April to have my labs drawn. These labs will tell if I am on the correct dose of Synthroid or whether I need to change it up, again. I will also get a Thyrogen level, which should be close to 0. I have had my full body scan which is normal. Yes!!! If all goes well then I am free to go for hopefully another year.

What is next? Well isn’t that just a loaded question. I have been offered a great opportunity to house-sit for friends on Whidbey Island, off the coast of Seattle for six months. Oooh, what is a girl to do? I am still in the considering phase but each day that I ponder this, I am more and more inclined to accept this offer.

Two years ago, Elsie (the still missing kitty) and I spent a summer in the northwest. I really liked it. I liked the small towns. I liked the people. I liked the access to the water and the mountains as well. I have been considering changing up my travel methods and have begun to plan to stay in places for longer so I can determine where I might want to settle. My first thought was to find a rental in Monterey. I love it there. Then this opportunity arose and well a woman can change her mind.

I started to write this post about a week ago. So much has changed in that time. I am holed up like so many in this country in the safety of my rig. I have wonderful friends in San Diego. Yvonne has kindly offered me her driveway for the past week or so. I sit on the top of a small hill, secure from the world, and have been practicing social isolation in the best of forms. Some mornings, I meet Yvonne in her hot tub. We have been catching up on movies and reality TV. Another day I drove to my friend, Nancy’s house and happily weeded in her front yard for three hours. I have been enjoying quiet and healing time.

Today, I am getting ready to move. My friends, Cynthia and Ward, who have helped me through all things Thyroid Cancer related are welcoming me back to their home. Several years ago I fell while hiking in the desert and broke my right ankle. I had to be off of that leg for seven weeks. I remember how hard it was to adjust to being down one leg, especially for the first few weeks. It would have been so much easier to have someone help me while I got used to my new temporary life. Tomorrow, Cynthia is going to have elective surgery on her foot. She will be non-weight bearing for five weeks. I have offered to help her and her husband out for a few weeks until they have their temporary lifestyle figured out.

This is what friends do for each other. This is all we can do for each other. We can lovingly and supportively help each other out. We can make life easier for ourselves and for others. This is what we do. Practicing kindness and caring is all I can do for myself and others. Even better is allowing myself to accept help and support and put my innate stubbornness on the back burner. So I am off to enjoy my friend’s company and help out the best way I know how. Maybe I will be able to learn a few new crochet stitches (Cynthia is my crochet mentor) ¬†while I enjoy the company of my friends. And…I will continue to give my self the time I need to heal and gain strength.

For those of you who have asked or wondered, I am doing OK. I am grateful for your concern and questions. I am grateful for my friends. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.