About JanetA

I am a nomad and adventurer. I used to travel for work now I travel for curiosity and fun. I started this blog when my husband of 21 years, Jim died of cancer on his 60th birthday. I started it because I wanted to have an easy way for my friends and family to follow me as I started a new adventure living in a small B class RV. I have a delightful little Roadtrek that I live in full time. It continues to be quite an adventure.

My Inner Child, The Dentist & Jim

Posted on December 14, 2016 by JanetA

I have been in San Diego for a little over a month. All scans, x-rays, and doctors appointments have been completed and the news is good. Well, almost all of the appointments have been completed. The only outstanding appointments at this time is the dentist. Yep, I arrived in San Diego with pain in my jaw (which of course I was sure was head & neck cancer). Day one was an appointment with my dentist, day two was an appointment with the periodontist, and day three was surgery to remove one of my back teeth and have a bone graft completed. Since then I have been through another gum surgery. I have one more to complete after I return from Christmas.

Have I told you that I really, really dread going to the dentist? All these dentists are very nice people but I have had very few good experiences with the dentist. It started when I was in fifth grade and continues to this day. Just in case you are not aware yet, dentists make me very uncomfortable.

No matter how hard I try to be adult and rational about all this, my little girl pops to the foreground and once again I am a mass of little girl feelings. I try to be an adult but often when I get to the dentist office and the news is not the best, I have found myself crying in the dental chair. I know I am not alone in these feelings. All I have to do is bring up the subject of the dentist and the person I am speaking with shares their own feelings of fear and dental dread.

All of us have an inner child. I have read books about this. I have gone to workshops about this. I have, through meditation had conversations with my inner child. I think I acknowledge her existence but then, well, just mention the dentist and here she is again, taking over my present day existence.

It is bad enough I become a small girl at the mention of the dentist. This time, when I arrived for my first appointment with the periodontist, I discovered the office was in the same medical building that I took Jim to, three times a week for the last four months of his life. He received IV nutritional therapy to help him better tolerate his chemotherapy. People with head and neck cancer often receive feeding tubes because they cannot tolerate eating. This therapy also helped him live without the feeding tube.

Not only did I have to deal with all my dental fears, I also had to confront some issues around grief. Boy does that subject continue to pop up at interesting times. Once again I sat down in the dental chair, the tech came in and I started crying. Was this fear, was this grief, was this everything all mixed together? I will never know completely. It was hard to walk to elevator and return, once again to this building.

As I review these last several weeks and my visit to this dentist and building, in some ways I find this has been a bit healing for me. I have had time to reflect the moments Jim and I shared in our visits to the doctor who treated him. Jim and I always functioned well as a team. We shared everything. Some of those visits were fraught with anxiousness but we always were very good at supporting each other through our lives together. Sometimes he would sleep and I would go for a walk. Other times we sat and read. Yet other times we shared our thoughts and feelings with each other. It has made me miss him more. It has made me recognize how important those moments were in our relationship. It has made me realize how important all moments are in my relationship to all others.

It is OK to acknowledge and accept my inner child. That little girl gives me the opportunity to laugh and play and look at the world with excitement and wonder. It is a little harder to acknowledge her when I am sobbing in the dental chair. I guess that is the time to acknowledge her most of all. At times like this I need to tell all of my selves “it’s OK”. If I need to cry, then cry. Usually after my sob session is over I can handle my time at the dentist better and I feel more adult.

Later this morning all of me is off to the dentist for a follow-up.

The End of the Bicycling Journey

Posted on November 18, 2016 by JanetA

Cat and the pups

The day prior to the election, Cat completed her bike tour of the west coast. She and her pups completed the Pacific Coast Bike Route. Although there were several issues with her bike along the way, mostly the tour was without incident, and on a sunny and warm southern California day she arrived at the Mexico border and went on to Rosarito for a couple of days of R&R on the beach.

She cut her trip short. She felt a strong need to head to northern California after the election results. Cat is now at a friend’s house in Yreka, before she starts her new adventure.

I made it back to San Diego in time for Halloween. After a successful post on Facebook, where I had six unique and different offers of places to stay, Elsie & I are in temporary residence with a good friend, Pat. I feel blessed to have remet her last winter. She has welcomed both of us with open arms. Thank you, Pat.

I did not realize I needed some recovery time after almost three months of pretty constant travel. I was road weary and a bit emotionally done.

Cat’s and my goal was realized. We both wanted to get her safely to the border of southern CA. It was very successful. She rode the last distance from Cambria to San Diego, almost totally unsupported. I was there if there was an emergency, otherwise she was on her own. I tracked her on my Find Friends app. We did text quite a few times to help her negotiate LA. When she arrived in San Diego we met up and spent a few pleasant hours together at the KOA in Chula Vista putting some finality to the trip. My last siting of her was from the San Diego airport car rental building as she and her two pups headed north in a rented SUV.

Would I do this type of trip again? I am not so sure. Am I glad that I did this trip with Cat? Yes. Were there issues along the way? Yes. It wasn’t always easy. We arranged how we did this journey with each other about 4 times. There is a lot that goes into traveling with someone, being the sag wagon, dealing with each other, two dogs and one cat. One of her friends told her that she had given us about 2-3 weeks. We proved her wrong.

Here is what was successful and good about this trip.

The scenery I drove through and explored was amazing.
Waking to the sound of waves or looking up into the redwoods was such a peaceful and calm experience.
Cat and I got to explore our relationship. I know that since this trip I can define a little bit more about who I am in this universe.
I visited with my friend Kat, in Corvallis. After 13 years of little communication, it was such a joyful and good reunion.
Elsie the cat continues to surprise me with her adaptability.
Traveling 40-50 miles a day gave me such a wonderful chance to explore areas, either hiking or biking. I did not have to move every day because of the short miles.
I met or saw so many people on this trip who were kind and good. I also stayed with several. It firmed up some new friends and reaffirmed some of my long standing friendships.
When I sent out a plea to hear from friends, I received wonderful e-mails and phone calls. It definitely made me feel a bit less lonely out on-the-road.
Being rescued by Mary, a good friend, when I had an “incident” with my RT.
Being happy with my pics.

Here is what Could have been more successful on this trip. This is definitely from my perspective.

Cat had to continually stop at bike shops on this trip. Although it gave me time to explore, it was a often a delay. I could feel Cat’s frustration.
Traveling with someone else so closely for so long was, at times, stressful. I don’t think we always communicated clearly with each other. Clear and frank communication is so important. I still need to work on this. I believe this will be an ongoing issue through out the rest of my life.
Later on in this trip I found myself frustrated by the lack of acknowledgement for my role in this trip. I know, I know, I should not need this, it should be about the journey. I discovered this was part of the journey for me. I hope, some day, I won’t need this recognition, but for right now, well, I am human. It would have been nice to have Cat tell other bikers my true role on this trip. Sigh.
I have discovered that it is hard to have dirt in my RT. I was continually cleaning and I am not so fond of cleaning. I am proud of my little home on wheels.
My accident in Crescent City. On the good side is I got to spend a week with Mary in Medford, Oregon.
A computer screen that needed to wait until I got to San Diego to fix.

Ruby Beach

Any trip I do has the good and the not so good parts in it. Sometimes the not so good parts become the story one tells of a trip. There were special moments on this trip that I will remember for a long time to come. My morning on Ruby Beach, WA is one I can think of immediately. A beautiful beach, low tide, star fish, anemones, starting in fog and ending with a blue sky and brilliant sun.

I am in San Diego until after the New Year. It is good to be reconnecting with long time friends. I even had some work, which gave me time to see all my fellow tour guides, and friends.

Now that I have had a few weeks here it is time to figure out where Elsie, the RT and I are heading when we get ready to head out again. As long as it is warmish and without snow I am good.

Any Suggestions????

Grief

Posted on November 10, 2016 by JanetA

I hesitated,briefly about scripting this post. It is two days post election and there are the jubilant winners and there are the grief stricken losers. Yesterday as I worked my way around the county doing errands there was a strange and different energy out there. It almost felt like a waiting. Waiting for the grief and anger and all other emotions to pause so that daily life can pick up again.

This was a bitter and hard campaign for both sides. There was a lot of anger and frustration around this election that I don’t believe I have seen before. Were either candidates one hundred percent qualified to lead? No. Were either candidates without a past? No. To me it reflected a bit like the United States Civil War. Families were divided and still are. Friends were divided and still are. Country vs city. White collar worker vs blue collar worker.

I have pondered so much and wonder how did our country ever come to this moment? I don’t know. We can blame politics as usual, wealthy vs poor, employed vs unemployed. People talk about feeling disenfranchised. The disenfranchised have won this election. The people who supported anyone else, are, I believe, feeling a bit disenfranchised at this moment.

Here is what I believe happened when the election results came in. All the anger, hatred and hostility from both sides, spiritually was in a big balloon, and the size of it kept getting bigger and bigger. When the election results came in, it burst and the pall that lay over San Diego, our country and the world yesterday were all those hard emotions that have now spread through all people. Grief, sadness, anger frustration, hostility and the unknown spread throughout the world.

Now we have to pick up the pieces. We as humans are very good at picking up the pieces. For those of you who think others should just get over it, I ask you to be kind. Recognize that your friends and family members need a few days to grieve. Give them that space. Let them grieve and gently put your arms around them and understand that all those people need some time and love. Then, as always, the human spirit will prevail and life will become a bit more whole again.

For those of us who feel grief, I say grieve and be kind. Be kind to those who believe differently than you. Love them for who they are. Once the strength of grief is past, pull yourself together and take a correct type of action. Get involved. Join groups, peacefully protest become a part of the process. I know that these two candidates have a lot of money. They both started somewhere though. I know Trump came from a wealthy family but Hillary did not. Many of our politicians did not come from money. They did get involved and brought themselves up through years in the political process. Where do you want to start? Where do I want to start?

Grief is a hard place to be in. I know this as Jim, my husband and best friend, died four years ago. Those of you who are grieving, do it. Don’t stay there, though. Grief is a hard place to remain in. The world goes by and you are not a part of it. You cannot work for change you can’t really do anything but grieve. Acknowledge your grief and then slowly when you are ready pick up the pieces and take positive action. Be involved with your life and the planet.

I know there are protests going on around the United States. It is all that frustration, anger and more that was once in that balloon. It is so strange to think that everyone is feeling disenfranchised. It is a hard moment in time. I truly believe we are all here to assist in transitions, personal, country and world wide. The question I am not quite ready to ask myself is, what is my purpose at this time? I need a few more days and then I will also pick myself up and figure out how I might want to take action.

For all those who are angry I would like to encourage you to direct your anger toward positive change. Let anger become your ally. If you can, don’t let anger create a negative environment to thrive in.

Mostly I ask all of you who might read this to support all those around you, People of Color, Muslims, the LGBT community and all those who are fearful of what January may bring. I always believed we are a country that supports everyone. I know many of you, at this time, do not feel this. Then we just need to work harder to remember this and support those around you. America is one of the most diverse countries in the world and it is about time we supported everyone’s diversity. So I implore you to do just that support diversity and be kind and compassionate to those who are struggling.

I understand that there is way more involved here than what I have written. Today these are my thoughts.

BE KIND

Separating Ways-Almost

Posted on October 24, 2016 by JanetA

Cat solo

Saturday, Cat (cycling the coast with her pups) and I, chose separate paths for the rest of her trip down the 1 and the 101. She is strong and has been cycling on her own for several days in a row for over a month now. Saturday I decided, since I was not needed any more, I would like to venture off in my own direction. I want to explore some of the area around central California on my own time and schedule.

I am still carrying the gear she does not need. She loaded up the rest of the dog food and other essentials and now is totally independent as she finishes her ride down to the Mexico border. I am still there in case of emergency but that is it. We will meet up in San Diego after her ride is complete and sort out the gear.

I hope Cat can appreciate what we have done for each other. At the beginning of this trip we had several long conversations about the “what ifs” of this journey. I asked her if she would have pursued this trip without me and she said, she did not think so. I am honored to have been a part of this adventure. I am glad I could more than, get her on her way and help out when I was needed. I imagine that many of the through bikers would have appreciated the support that I was able to give to her. It is a hard journey, physically, emotionally and more. Now it is time for Cat to fly solo and for me to figure out what is next.

This has been an interesting two plus months on the road. I have learned a lot about myself. I have learned what I can tolerate and not tolerate. Whoa, I am only 64 years old and I am just now figuring this out. Mostly what I have learned is that I want to be appreciated, not more than necessary yet appreciated none the less. I guess I really want to appreciate myself and I am getting there. I didn’t always feel this appreciation on this journey of two. Because of the long days, Cat did not always have any more to give at the end of her day. This trip truly tested us both in many different ways.

I was the one who instigated our separation. I felt like a mother who was seeing her sidekick fly the coop. I am glad to know she is strong and continuing her journey down the coast. I am proud of what she has accomplished and what she will accomplish still. It will be good to meet at the end of her trip.

Meanwhile I am in the town of Atascadero this morning in a sweet little coffee house, typing like crazy. I spent last night at a Harvest Host site near Paso Robles. The Rio Seco Winery is a small family operation with an interesting history. It was used as a film set for the 1987 movie “The Junkman.” The barn, where the tasting room is today was also part of a major drug bust. It was used as a growing house for marijuana. Today it is a lovely small winery specializing in red wines. The sunset was gorgeous from my small house on wheels.

Today I am not sure where I am wandering off to. Wander I shall. I think I am going off to look for those twisty little back roads that I love so much.

Please continue to follow Cat’s trip. After more than two thirds of her trip was over, her bike is now in good shape. She is riding strong.

Elsie, the Roadtrek and Me are riding strong, too.

RT in the Redwoods

Janet in the Redwoods

Elsie the Brave

Year Four-How Are You Doing?

Posted on October 20, 2016 by JanetA

Jim and me on our last travel adventure together, Peru

October 17th was the fourth year anniversary of Jim’s death. He was and still is (in a way) my husband. He died from metastasis of salivary gland cancer. We had a really good relationship. I miss him still.

Each year at this time I have people call me and ask how I am doing. It always baffles me, a little,when this happens. I don’t miss him more on the day of his death. I miss him every day in little and big ways. Does it mean I think of him all the time? Well no. I might find myself doing something and then think, Jim would have loved this or he would not have. I know my friends are being kind and thoughtful and I appreciate that. I am just not always sure how to answer that question. At the time they ask, I might be doing fine or more than fine. Usually I am busy.

Big Waves

This year I was bicycling from Monterey to Pacific Grove and back, seeing a chiropractor (I slipped on the step to my RV & thought it might be a good idea to get an adjustment) and enjoying the day outside.

While biking, I stopped to watch the waves for a while. You may have guessed by now, I love the ocean and the bigger the waves, the better. I met a woman, Phyllis who was sharing the same bench with me. I am a strong believer that not much happens by accident. Phyllis has been divorced, widowed and now married for a third time.

I have found, since Jim’s death, if I want to ask a question of someone, I just do. If they want to answer, it is greatly appreciated. If not that is OK too. I asked Phyllis about her experience through grief. I really wanted to know someone else’s take on this. I follow a couple blogs of women who have lost a partner, yet it is not often I get to talk to someone in person about this topic.

Grief is personal, yet I have found that some experiences are common to many. My question to her was about fear. I am not usually a fearful person. Since Jim’s death, fear has become a close ally. When people say to me how brave I am, selling my home and traveling, I marvel at the comment. If only they knew how fear is usually present in everything I do. I don’t get it. I didn’t used to be this way. Phyllis works with hospice as a volunteer. She said that fear appears to be a part of the grieving process for many. It was for her. Whew what a relief, I thought it was just me.

I am curious why fear? There could be a lot of emotions but why is fear mine. I will not claim ownership, yet fear is certainly close, much of time. I don’t have an answer to that question. Fear does not have to be negative. It is a good thing when it stops me from doing something stupid. It can also be good if it increases my awareness of my surroundings. Fear, though can also stop me from trying something new or different or reaching out to others. That is not good.

Each day I walk through fear, to other side and open my eyes to the world as it is right now. I step into my RV, thank Elsie for her presence, have faith that all is well with the day and move on. On the days I stay still, I read and contemplate and enjoy the quietness of the ocean and the forest and for the next few nights a view of Hearst Castle.

I refuse to let fear control me. Since fear seems to remain present in my life, I will consider it an ally. It will teach me and then one day, I truly believe it will not be present in my daily life. As an ally I can call for fear when I need it, thank it and then put it back in it’s place until I need it again.

Moving on through my life.

Another Year

Posted on October 10, 2016 by JanetA

Jim

Year number four. Today would have been Jim’s 64th birthday. Four years ago he was in the hospital for the last time. I keep thinking that this time of the year will get easier. Each year a new challenge presents itself at this time of the year. This year it is a really big one. What do I do when this trip down the coast is over? Right now I do not know.

I like to take this time of the year to reflect on Jim and what he meant in my life and what he means in my life now. I try not to get maudlin and as each year passes, it gets a bit easier to reflect with love and humor and gratitude for being in such a complete relationship.

Jim sharing Big Red with K-2 Kitty

I am not sure if he would have enjoyed what I am doing now. He was a home body. He liked going away and exploring. He also loved coming home. Home meant a lot to him. He liked to fix things and make things and sit in his big red chair and read. I am not sure how he would feel about being on the road full time. I am not always sure how I feel about this new lifestyle either.

After Jim died I set up a scholarship in his name at Grossmont College. He was an administrator and counselor at the college for close to twenty five years. He loved working in a college. He enjoyed the staff and the students. Being involved with the college was an important part of his life. Sometimes he was frustrated but over all he really enjoyed his work. He liked to see students achieve and move on in life.

Jim at Work

Since this scholarship was started I have been invited to the breakfasts they have for the students who have won the scholarship for the current semester. At first I thought that these events would be boring. I have found them to be just the opposite. These students who win the scholarships are the hope of our future. They are focused and determined and want to achieve. Each semester the applicants need to write an essay on why they are applying for this scholarship.

The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship is split. One semester it is awarded to a student in the Fine Arts. Jim was a dancer, Hip Hop, Ballet, Tap, Scottish Country Dancing and more. While he was going through his masters program he was involved with several theater groups. I have some wonderful photos of this time in his life.

The second semester it is given to a student in the Social Sciences. Jim spent most of his work career supporting students. As a counselor and the Dean of Counseling he supported his staff of counselors to find some unique ways to help students achieve their dreams. He was proud of his staff and his students. I was proud of him. It was so good to live with someone who had passion.

If you click the link below it will take you to the essay of the student who was awarded the scholarship this fall.

The Essay

With the anniversary of Jim’s passing I like to remind all of you my faithful and not so faithful readers that I am still attempting to make this scholarship a perpetual one. To do this I need to raise $25,000. I have raised over $9000 yet I still have a ways to go. If you would like to donate to help me achieve this goal I will deeply appreciate it. No amount is too small.

There are two ways to donate. You can write a personal check made out to FGGC. and mail it to the address below. It is a tax deductible donation. The information is below.

The Foundation for Grossmont and Cuyamaca Colleges
8800 Grossmont College Drive
El Cajon, CA 92020-1799

Tax Deductible Contributions per section 501 (c) (3) of the IRS Code; EIN 45-2692818

The other way to donate is to click on the Go Fund Me picture on the left side of my Blog. It will take you to the Go Fund Me Site I set up for this scholarship. You can also click here and it will take you to the Go Fund Me site as well.

This is a gentle plea. I am not always comfortable asking for donations, yet I know that some of you would like to help and it is the end of the year. Please know that I accept each of the donations with deep and heartfelt gratitude.

Now I venture off into year four. I am still trying to figure it out, whatever it is. I am so grateful for having twenty one years with this lovely man. I miss his still and yet I find I can smile more now when I remember him. The tears are less often. Maybe it is true that grief softens over time.

Ask me tomorrow.

Friendship

Posted on October 3, 2016 by JanetA

This month, October is always a marker month for me. First, it was when I was born. The real marker for me, however, is this is the month that Jim, best friend and husband for twenty one years died from cancer.

As I approach the date of his last admission to the hospital and then his death, I think it will get easier as time passes, yet, each year as this month rolls around, I find myself once again thinking of Jim and the events that came to pass. I know it has changed my life, yet I am not always certain how. There are the basic real life changes.

I am single, widowed, or something in that range.
I have to figure out how to do everything on my own or at least contact the right people to help.
I sold my house in July and currently, am full timing it in my Roadtrek.
I don’t have someone to talk to whenever I want. It has made me reach out to my friends more yet I miss the easy companionship we had.
Learning to cook and eat for one has been an interesting challenge for me. It is not as much fun for me to create a meal for one.

There are many other challenges that could be included here. I think you get the gist of it.

I have been thinking about Jim’s and my friends as this month has rolled in. I am so thankful to so many of them. Without their help and kind, loving support my walk through grief would be very different.

I have been thinking a lot of a good friend of Jim’s, Doug. For the entire time I have known Jim, Doug was a presence in our lives. I heard many Doug and Jim stories from Jim over the years. When we got married Doug and his former wife paid for our honeymoon to San Francisco. We had wonderful personalized tour of San Francisco with Doug and Lisa. They met us at the San Fransisco airport with a car rental and off we went into the city for four days. It was a delightful time.

At our important events Doug was there. The event I remember the most was around Jim’s death. Four days before he died, the phone rang in the hospital room and it was Doug. I thought he was still in the Los Angeles area. He asked if we wanted company and we both said, of course. Then he announced he was in the hospital lobby and up he came.

Doug spent the final four days of Jim’s life with me and him. There was nothing that was too little that he wouldn’t do for Jim. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for me. Doug was a firm presence for me to hold onto as we progressed through those four days. When I wasn’t there, Doug was. He and Jim talked and laughed and remembered times. They also caught up one more time on each other’s lives. When Jim died, Doug was there in the room as a witness to this important event as well. There could not have been a better friend and I want to honor that in this posting.

He remained in San Diego for a few days to make sure that I had my feet underneath me. When he drove back to LA and his life it was with the final words, “if you need anything, just call”.

After Jim died the Doug and Jim stories continue. I received an e-mail from Doug about a year or so ago, sharing with me the phone call Jim and Doug had the day that Space Shuttle blew up. It was a very intimate moment between two good friends. I have no doubt that this deepened and secured their friendship. I was going to share the e-mail with you, here but I cannot find it. Of course.

This is what friendship is about. We can laugh and share the good times, yet it is the sharing of the intimate and in your face painful times that marks those special and meaningful friendships in ones life. It is not often you find that friend who you can laugh, cry and share with over many years. Some may never find the depth of friendship that was shared by Jim and Doug.

Jim was fortunate, very fortunate to have such a friend as Doug. Doug, I think would reciprocate that thought and feeling.

I have never needed to call but I do stay in touch by e-mail and Facebook. Doug travels the world with Nancy, his partner of many years. He leads a full and diverse life. I am glad that I continue to be a part of it even on the periphery.

Today I am thankful for the presence of Doug in Jim’s life and in mine. I benefit from their friendship. It helps keep Jim alive to me and reminds me, once again, how special our relationship was.

Today I am grateful for Doug. Doug-Thank you.

Bridges-Love Those Bridges

Posted on September 28, 2016 by JanetA

Delaware Memorial Bridge

I have seriously fallen in love with bridges. I have always loved them, but now I have arrived at the point where I want to take a picture of each one I see. I have refrained. It is hard.

I grew up in Delaware, the second smallest state in the nation. They have some really beautiful and giant bridges. The Delaware Memorial Bridge comes to mind. It is a double span suspension bridge that crosses the Delaware River. When I was young I knew crossing that bridge meant we were on our way to the “Jersey Shore”.

Crossing the St George bridge in southern Delaware, was the first time I saw a sign, offering a phone number to call if you were afraid to drive your car across the bridge. Someone else did the driving for you. I suppose the person making that phone call would be cowering in the back seat as they rode the length of the span.

A really interesting bridge is the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel. You ride above the water then below the water, doing this 3 times above and 2 times under the Chesapeake Bay. The tunnels allowed ships safe passage into the bay. I have ridden it once. It was fun and interesting.

Driving across the Golden Gate, late July-Take note the fog.

Then I moved to California. The first time I saw the Golden Gate and the Oakland Bay bridge, it was love at first site. They are so majestic and grand.It is still a thrill driving or bicycling across the Golden Gate Bridge. It is not unusual for that bridge to be covered with fog.

Crossing into Vancouver

Now I am in the northwest and have once again renewed my love for bridges. As we drove across the Columbia River, on I-5 going north, I kept asking Cat to take photos. I was so excited. We arrived in Vancouver and crossed another beautiful bridge just as it was getting dark.

Astoria-Megler Bridge

Progressing down the coast I have been crossing one beautiful bridge after another. The bridges in Oregon begin with the Astoria–Megler Bridge and continue down the coast to California. These bridges were designed and built by Conde B. McCullough. McCullough combined Romanesque arches, Egyptian obelisks, gothic piers, and Art Deco designs with the state-of-the-art and cutting-edge technologies of the day. In 2005, 11 of these coastal bridges were placed on the National Register of Historic Places. They are beautiful, functional bridges and so much fun to cross.

Rocky Creek Bridge–1927

Siuslaw River Bridge–1936

Yaquina Bay Bridge

Approaching Center Span. Yaquina Bay Bridge

Remember, as you see these bridges, Cat and her pups have crossed each one by bicycle. I drove the Astoria-Megler Bridge three times so I could snap a few quick photos of her. It helped that they were doing construction on the bridge, so everyone either had to stop or slow down. It was not a hardship to cross it that many times. I absolutely enjoyed each drive.

McCullough Memorial Bridge (Coos Bay)–1936

Today, as I crossed the McCullough Memorial Bridge (Coos Bay)–1936, I knew I had to tell you of these beautiful structures. For this bridge loving woman I have been in my glory riding down the 101, crossing one beautiful bridge after another.

I love all bridges, This is a foot bridge on a hike I did at Cape Lookout.

Friends & Wine Anyone?

Posted on September 17, 2016 by JanetA

Last Monday I took a break from the coast and route 101.

Have you ever had one of those forever friends? You know the ones I mean, you may not be in touch for years, but suddenly, one day you are back in touch. Not too long after that an opportunity arrises to be able to get together and catch up. It is like yesterday. I have one of those friends in Corvallis, Oregon.

Last Monday after I made sure Cat was good to go, I departed the coast, drove one hour inland (east) and met up with Kat and her husband Charlie. We figured 2003 was probably the last time the two of us physically saw each other. It has been almost that long since we have spoken. Thanks to Facebook and her daughter (we are FB friends) Kat and I got in touch. The first phone call was hours long.

I spent this past week in their home. Elsie and I had the downstairs apartment. I think Elsie was glad for a bit more room and so was I. Initially I was suppose to leave and head back to the coast, today. By the second day of our visit, we both realized we needed more time. I extended my stay until a week from today.

Kat, Charlie & Janet

I am having so much fun. Kat is a spinner and loves to explore genealogy. With hikes mixed in we have been catching up. One day we spent immersed in my family’s genealogy. She has promised to help me dye some wool and go home with my own yarn. It is so much fun. I am also enjoying Charlie, her husband. We all get along very well and I am so glad to be back in her company. It is truly a delight. I am getting to see a part of Oregon that was not on my itinerary.

There was one glitch in the plans, in regards to spending a second week. This Sunday they have family coming into town to spend the night. I have my sweet little Roadtrek the RV. This afternoon I took off to go camp for the next two nights.

I am a member of Harvest Hosts. They are an organization that works with different attractions all over the United States. For my $49/year I can call ahead to different attractions (vineyards, farms) and spend the night. Tonight I am at Emerson Vineyards in Monmouth, Oregon. I am camped behind the barn for the night with Miss Elsie the Cat. It is so nice here. I am out in the country. It is quiet. While it is raining outside I am sitting inside writing this blog.

Tom, owner of Emerson Vineyards

Emerson Vineyards is a small family run business. I have met Tom the owner and investor. He is very laid back and nice. Not only is he knowledgable about the wines he also was a wealth of information on the local area. I went to a wine tasting this afternoon and now have 3 bottles of wine and a bottle of yummy port sitting on my countertop. I like this type of camping.

I am so glad to know I have friends, similar to Kat all over the United States and Canada. Often my visits coincide with my need to be social and be in other’s company. My visit with Kat is very well timed. We have known each other for so long, there is an ease between the two of us. We share a history and it makes it easy to be in her company. Right now I am enjoying that ease.

Today I am thankful for organizations such as Harvest Hosts that add adventure to my life.

Today I am very thankful for my forever friends. They bring such joy to my life. Today I am thankful.

Changing the Situation

Posted on September 16, 2016 by JanetA

Sometimes travel is easy. At those times I sit back, relax and enjoy the ride. There are moments in travel that are hard, things don’t go right and the trip becomes a struggle. I believe the term is “Roadblock”.

Riding down the coast with Cat has had moments of each. The ride itself has been comfortable and the sights have been rewarding and awe inspiring. Cat’s days are long and often she is tired when arriving at camp. It is hard for her to want to interact and be social. Sometime I have been lonely on this trip and I long for the socialization at the end of the day. These two separate daily events have made it hard for both of us.

About 2 weeks ago we decided that staying together each day might not be the healthiest thing for us. A friend of mine reminded me, it is important to remember that this is a situation that Cat and I have chosen to take on. We can change the situation anytime we want. We decided to try a different approach to our current situation. After a few different experiments on how we could make things work smoother, Cat is now riding unassisted. That means she is carrying her tent, sleeping bag and all her gear with her on her bike. I am there if she needs me and I am somewhat paralleling her ride down the coast. We touch base by text every few days to make sure this is working for her and myself. So far, it is working well. As Cat has gotten stronger and increased her mileage, she has become more independent. It feels, to me, like a natural progression.

Paralleling each other has given me the time to explore more at my leisure. I can pick my campsites and stay a few days or more. This has allowed me to relax more and not feel like I always need to be on top of where we stay the next night. It has given Miss Elsie the Cat a few dog free nights in a row. I think that is a good thing for her.

Friendships are fragile. They need to be taken care of on a daily basis or even more frequently. The hardest thing to do sometimes is to communicate with others. I have found on this trip that often when things have gotten stressful between the two of us, it is a result of miscommunication. Our friendship is new, we have not known each other long. It takes practice and time with other human beings to learn how to communicate well. We are a work in progress.

I travel alone, now that Jim has died. He and I traveled together, frequently. We had our moments of miscommunication. It wasn’t always stress free. Most of the time, though, we did communicate well. It was usually smooth and easy and supportive. The longer we were together the easier and smoother it became.

Now that I am alone again I have to learn how to communicate with others again. It is not an easy process. We as humans are fragile and can be broken pretty easily, at times. We are also resilient and can pick up the pieces and move on again. This combination of fragility and resilience is what makes friendships worth the effort. This is why Cat and I keep adjusting our situation as we move down the 101. We are not ready to give up on the trip or our friendship.

Sometimes it is worth the effort one puts into a situation. This whole adventure with Cat continues to allow me to grow and define who I am as a human being on this planet. It is giving me the opportunity to find my strength to learn how to communicate freely and openly with another human being and hold my ground. And, if this situation doesn’t work then it is OK to change it again.

Journeys of Thankfulness

Embracing Life, Traveling in my RV, Feeling Grateful

Author Archives: JanetA

About JanetA

My Inner Child, The Dentist & Jim

The End of the Bicycling Journey

Grief

Separating Ways-Almost

Year Four-How Are You Doing?

Another Year

Friendship

Bridges-Love Those Bridges

Friends & Wine Anyone?

Changing the Situation

About JanetA

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