Family

In 1952 I was blessed to be born into a loving, caring and teaching family. For several years our extended family, two grandmothers, and a grandfather lived in our home. I have been thinking of my birth family often this past month.

Since my early twenties, I have been “on my own”, living far from all of them. I have always been a bit of a wanderer and decided early to use my career, as an RN to travel and live in different parts of the United States. After living for three to five years in each place, I would pick a new place, get a job and move.  I settled in southern California. I obtained my Masters in Holistic Health Education, and at the end of five years, just as I was getting ready to move on, I met Jim, my friend, partner, lover and husband and settled into the San Diego region.

Janet & Jim

Jim died in 2012, and in June of 2013, I bought my RV and my life as a nomad began again. The house is now sold and I live in my RV full time. It is small and comfortable and for right now it is home. I have traveled all over the United States and parts of Canada and have embraced this lifestyle to the best of my ability.

Although I have had curiosity and fondness for everywhere I have visited or traveled, I return again and again to the desert southwest and anywhere from the Rocky Mountains and west. I love the wide-open spaces, the quiet, the stillness and the breathtaking moments of awareness.

Enter the Coronavirus and I am in San Diego. I am staying with good friends. I am recovering from treatment for thyroid cancer. Cynthia is recovering from foot surgery. We are all helping each other. I have stayed in touch with my local San Diego friends thanks to Zoom and Facetime. We have been doing driveway meetups, practicing the art of virtual hugs (not as good as the real thing) and sitting at least six feet apart. It has helped to break the isolation that my solo friends are experiencing. I have a strong and good family of friends.


Since I have been sheltering in place, I miss my birth family. Despite our differences, I miss the family I was born into. My sisters live in different places, one in northern New Jersey, and one in Ohio. I know they do not live close but they seem to be in reaching distance of each other. I am not. The three of us have had one Zoom meetup and that has helped. I want to arrange a Zoom meeting with them on an ongoing basis. It is comforting to see them and just sit and chat and listen. My oldest sister and I call back and forth. I look forward to those times when we talk.Families are a big messy affair even if there are only a few siblings. We can argue, we can disagree, we can laugh, share stories, and enjoy moments in time. Even at our worst times, we are still family.

In mid-March, my one niece (in Ohio) gave birth to a beautiful little girl. My NJ sister and I got to meet her, thanks to Zoom. I would love to embrace and hold that little bundle. I would enjoy a hug from family, actually from anyone. My other niece and her daughter, Quinn, live in New Jersey near my oldest sister.

My Ohio niece, Brittany, loves family. She once said to me that if it was up to her she would have a compound of homes and all of her family would live there. She has been instrumental in drawing me back into the lives of my family. I remain grateful to her, for the ability to do this and include all of us.

 

As I sit here on a gray Sunday morning, my friends are downstairs listening to their church service. One of the hymns I heard wafting upstairs was:

“For the Beauty of the Earth”. The third refrain is the one that struck a chord in me at this moment of time. “For the joy of human love, brother, sister, parent, child, Friends on earth and friends above, For all gentle thoughts and mild. Lord of all to thee we raise, This our hymn of grateful praise.”

Today I am thankful for all my family, friends, strangers and acquaintances. Today I am thankful for recognizing the longing to see and talk to my sisters and nieces. I am glad they are all safe and sheltered in place. I am thankful to be able to reach out over the miles and remind myself to be very thankful for a loving and strong birth family.

 

Looking for Acts of Kindness, Faith & Hope

At a time when life has changed and we are all learning to “shelter in place”, I have been looking for the good that continues to reveal itself. I have been looking for hope and faith.

Several times a week I take a walk around the neighborhood, and I find the innate goodness of people all around me. As we walk by each other, at a safe six-foot or more distance, people say hello, give a wave and a smile before we continue. I wonder in our hurried world pre-Covid 19, how many would be taking the time to say hello before moving on.

On my walk yesterday I found a neighborhood art gallery that someone had created next to the sidewalk. It is a unique way to encourage creativity and share it with the neighborhood. All ages are welcome. One simple act helps each of us feel a bit less isolated and alone. It helps foster a sense of community in a neighborhood.

Social Media helps me not feel isolated in this novel time. Facebook has helped me stay in contact with my friends scattered throughout the United States, Canada and further abroad. The Coronavirus posts I look at occasionally, however,  if there is news of family and friends I read it. It is a good reminder that we are all still out there in this big wide world. I am also enjoying all the funny videos and cartoons people are posting. It is good to laugh a little every day.

Via the Nextdoor App, I am reminded of the generosity of others. People can be generous in unique times. If someone makes a plea for hand sanitizer, paper towels or toilet paper, Nextdoor neighbors respond. people are shopping for the elderly. Yesterday someone was looking for a cap and gown to borrow so she could take photos of herself for her canceled graduation from college. Within the first few minutes, she had over six offers. When humans slow down and find themselves in unique situations they exhibit kindness and thoughtfulness that are often forgotten when we are hurriedly moving from one place to another. And…those folks on Nextdoor are still keeping an eye out for the ever-elusive Elsie the cat.

My Great Niece, Arden

Zoom, a meeting app, offers me the opportunity to say hello to my sisters, welcome a new great-niece into the world, take a Scottish Dance class with other dancers from all over the world, practice yoga with one of my favorite yoga teachers, and so much more. Zoom, Facetime and other communication apps, allow my world to remain large.

I do not need to look far for an example of generosity. My friends, Cynthia and Ward have opened their home to me. They have opened their arms and invited me in. I have my own bedroom and a big, real shower. And the view from my bedroom is lovely. We have been getting along well and enjoying each other’s company. It is good to be with others. Even I would grow tired of my own company.

I will continue to search for the unique in this very unique time. I am grateful for continuing signs of faith and hope small and large. I am encouraged by the kindness of strangers and friends. Today I am grateful.

 

 

 

 

 

 

How Am I Doing? How Are You Doing?

Give it a week or two, a day or two, an hour or two and all of our lives change. I never would have guessed that I would be in lockdown due to a novel virus. I would never have guessed that I would have to figure out how to self-quarantine in a tiny motorhome. I would have never guessed that I would not have to live alone in my rig. I would have never guessed.

I am doing well. Just days before the Coronavirus became overwhelming, my friend, Cynthia, had elective surgery. Her right foot was operated on and she is non-weight bearing on her right leg for five weeks. I had offered to help her and her husband, Ward with the recovery. I was moved into their home and then the Coronavirus hit. These good and kind friends invited me to stay for as long as need be (or until they are weary of me). So, here I am isolated in a nice home with two good friends. We chat, play games, watch Netflix or Prime and wait it out. When we need alone time we all go to our corners, my bedroom, Ward’s office, and Cynthia is in the downstairs of the house. So far we are making it work with ease.

Fanita Ranch

My rig is in the driveway so I can visit it. It also gives me a wee bit of freedom to find alone time if I need it. I can drive to a view and sit in my rig and enjoy the change. The other day I drove to Santee for a possible Elsie the Cat sighting. The cat did not pan out, however, I had the opportunity to walk out on some open land, Fanita Ranch and enjoy the spring flowers. I was the only one there.

For most of us, we are in an unknown state. As a nation, we are trying to figure it out. We are struggling to do what is right. Doing what is right takes a bit of “moral muscle”. On a beautiful day in San Diego can I really not go to the beach, bay or mountains? Yes! It is hard to stay away from places I love yet, for now, I will remain distant and wait. I will need to continue to ask myself the hard questions about what is right, over what it is I really want to do. Hopefully, the answers will remain the correct ones for each given situation.

I am concerned about my friends who are living single. I am very aware that I have found myself in a fortunate situation. One of my solo friends stated, “I am an introvert, I like to be alone, but I like being able to get out and visit with friends”. What do you other singles do to help with true social isolation? What are the unique things you have found to keep yourself entertained and patient? I reach out with phone calls or texts because this is the best I can do at the moment. This morning I discovered Zoom and was able to visit with one of my single friends where we could see each other and talk.

I have been learning new skills and reactivating old, unused ones. Since Cynthia is non-weight bearing on her right leg, I am the head chef in the house. I have great instructions (Cynthia) and cookbooks to guide me in my cooking. I have not cooked so much in years. And there are so many cool tools to use in this kitchen. I have found that the right tools make the job so much easier. Last night I made broccoli soup. It was delicious. I have cooked chicken a few different ways, created lunches and more. Cynthia helps out where she can. It helps that the freezer is stocked and we can order home delivery for veggies and fruit. Ward and I have figured out how to help each other in the kitchen. It is more fun to cook for others. Cooking for one is often a disappointing affair for me.

I wonder how my friends and others who follow my blog are doing? Please let me know. I hope you are all well and working on thriving in this very odd situation we find ourselves in. Know that I think of all of you, the world and the people within it, often with love and kindness.

Still finding small and large reasons to be thankful.

It has come to my attention, recently that some of you would like to receive notices of new posting on my blog without access to Facebook. All you need to do is scroll to the link on this page titled Follow My Blog (it is underneath the pic of my rig), click on it, and add your email to the link. That way you don’t have to find them on FB and can receive a simple notification via email when a new post is published. If you find this is not easy to do let me know and I can send you an invitation.