You know how you make a plan that seems set, and then bam… something happens, and everything changes? Here I am, not even out of California, and things have changed. Sigh.
Santa Barbara
My friend Tina and I had a wonderful five days exploring Santa Barbara and Carpenteria. It was casual and relaxing, just what I needed, and I hope she enjoyed it, too.
Tina headed south on the bus/train on April 1, and I headed north. Something was not right with me. I had been feeling off for about five days, just a little, and it was easy to ignore or put it aside.
Lavender Fields at Sunset
I gave up after spending a lovely night at Hambly Lavender Farm in the Central California Coastal area. I decided to see a doctor to find out what was happening physically.
I called a Roadtrek friend in Salinas, CA. You might remember my adventures with Woody the Cat. I have house-sat for Mandy, Woody, and Rocky, the dog, a few times over the past few years. I wanted someone to love me a little and listen to me. I did not want to be alone.
I am in Salinas through the weekend, at least. I am now on antibiotics for an infection, and I get to rest, relax, and enjoy everyone’s company. I also have a soft big bed in which to sleep.
I have had problems with infections this winter, and I thought they had resolved, but they have not yet. Hopefully, this will work, and I can continue north. If not, I will decide what I am doing and when, on the fly. Plans might be changing for the summer. Stay tuned.
Sleeping in the Lavender Fields
I have often said that my RV, EmmyLou, saved my life after Jim’s death. My first trip, less than a year after he died, was a lifesaver. Everyone was waiting to greet me with open arms. I was loved, pampered, and more.
Traveling, seeing amazing and unique places, and meeting interesting and delightful people have been an experience. Meeting people and becoming friends with them is definitely the part of this experience that saved me when I needed it most.
These people are not just Roadtrek friends; I have become friends with diverse people. I feel so honored to call them my friends. We travel together. I visit them in their homes, house-sit for them, we meet in the desert in the winter, along the Oregon Coast in the summer, kayak together, go to Mexico, and more. My life has become richer and fuller due to these friendships. I have been reading quotes recently about the need for people to find their tribe. My RV’ing buddies are definitely part of my tribe, and I am so honored to have each and everyone in my life. I treasure these Heartfelt friendships.
This is the latest update. Travel is temporarily on hold. I am resting and enjoying an extended visit with Mandy. It is good to catch up. I get to take Rocky for walks. It gets me out and keeps me active on these rainy days. Woody snuggles in the evening. What more could I ask for? Well, I could ask to be well. I am working on that.
Meanwhile, I am thankful for so much today. I am thankful for the Nurse Practitioner who was kind and helpful this morning. I am thankful for the good medical care in this country. I am thankful for my Tribe—you know who you are. On a cold, rainy, and hail-kind-of day, I am thankful for Mandy, who has taken me in, loved me, and given me a big, comfy bed to sleep in.
As some of you may know, I chose to extend my stay in San Diego this winter to help a friend through the initial stages of grief after the loss of her husband and love in early December.
From childhood to adulthood, we are taught about life. We go to school to learn how to succeed and become fully functioning adults in what is sometimes a crazy yet wonderful world. I was taught by parents, peers, teachers, the church, animals, and more. And succeed, I did.
This world does not teach us about fear, loss, and change. It doesn’t teach us about grief and its impact on the individual. When it appears in our lives, we must learn on the fly, struggling to stay upright and functioning while dealing with emotional blow after blow.
It doesn’t necessarily have to be death. It can appear in many guises: divorce, loss of a job, or a move to another area of the country away from family, friends, and support. Try the diagnosis of cancer. I have been there twice. It can be something catastrophic like 9/11 or a tornado, hurricane, or any other natural disaster. No one event, small or large, defines grief.
Losing a partner is grief like no other. Everything I expected for the rest of my life came to a halt. Where was Jim? He was supposed to be next to me until we got old. What was I supposed to do with my life now? How could I recreate myself again while I was dealing with such profound loss? And….where was Jim, someone who made me feel unique, worthy, beautiful, and so much more?
If we survive long enough, we all will meet up with grief and loss and the emotional storm it creates in each one of us.
Everyone handles grief differently, every single person. Grief is a personal journey. Some will tackle it by planning and proceeding like nothing has happened. Others need time to cry, feel sad, and separate from the rest of the world. Others will retreat inside, feeling safe in the memories and loss. And many of us are somewhere in the above mix.
Grief has been the most potent teacher I have ever had. It has woken me up and shut me down. How can that happen at the same time? I don’t know. It has allowed me to be in the moment, not see the future or the past. Being present in the moment is something I tried to achieve in my every day life, yet I never truly discovered it until the last days of Jim’s life and his death. All of it made me feel more alive than I have ever felt. How could that be when I was watching my Jim move through the last moments of his life? How could that be when I was going through some of the worst times of my life? I honestly don’t know.
How does one go about supporting others through grief? It is hard to tackle when we know little about the heart’s workings. We see our friends or family members struggling, which is sometimes hard to understand. Why doesn’t she want to go out with her friends? Why is she still crying? Why is she not able to get on with life? It has been three months, a year, or more. Why isn’t she back to “normal.” Why, why, why? There is no timeline, and there is no “normal.”
I struggle to figure out what normal is now. I am eleven years out from the loss of Jim, and mostly, I am doing fine, yet every once in a while, something triggers my grief, and it might as well have happened yesterday. Go figure.
I have read a lot about grief. I have listened to podcasts about grief. I can suggest this podcast, All There Is, by Anderson Cooper. I have written about grief. I am still learning about grief. This will continue until the day I decide to step on over.
Being here for my friend has been a good teacher for me. I believe all any of us can do is support each other in this wild world. How can we support someone grieving, especially in the first year?
Be patient and be kind.
Don’t expect the person grieving to reach out to you to thank you for cards or plan to get together. Grief is so overwhelming that it is hard to plan.
Know that the person in grief may tire easily. There is so much to do physically in those first months. Lawyers, banks, insurance, and all that business stuff. Each task, no matter how small, can be overwhelming. I found I had little to no emotional reserves. One or two tasks would wear me out, and I would return home to watch mindless television, nap, or stare at the wall.
Call and let the person dealing with grief talk. Who cares if you hear the same stories more than once. Your ears are helping the other person to heal and not feel alone.
Everyone is on board for the first few months and tries their best to stay in touch, and then it peters off. Four months, six months, or a year out, a person dealing with loss can feel overwhelmingly alone. So stay in touch. I put send a card or call a person reminders on my calendar. It reminds me to think of others. And I love to send cards. It also gives me moments to think of my friends and ensure I continue reaching out. After all, all we have is each other.
Even if they say no, invite them to events and things you would usually invite them to. Knowing that the real world is waiting for them to rejoin it is a good reminder in the midst of grieving.. Don’t be offended or take it personally if they say no.
Sometimes, one-on-one time is better than a group, no matter how small. I still prefer small groups to large crowds. I have trained myself to enter larger groups now that I have been alone for so long.
Don’t expect the person to “talk about loss.” Sometimes, a person needs to go out for coffee or a walk on the beach and talk about the rest of the world. I enjoyed my friend Therese coming over with a Scrabble game and food and enjoying an afternoon on the back deck.
Know when enough is enough and take them home so they can nap.
Don’t be offended if your invitation is turned down. Know that that moment was not the right one. Internally, they appreciate your effort. And try again and again.
Continue to ask them what you can do for them and follow through. Always follow through.
This list could be longer, but I think you get the idea. The more you love someone in distress, the more you are inviting them to remember to come back out into the world when they are ready. Most importantly, it reminds them they are loved, worthy, and not alone.
Today, I am thankful. I am thankful for the opportunity my friend has given me to learn, grow, and become more human. Today, I am thankful she doesn’t have to be alone in these first months. Today, I am thankful for growing a friendship that I hope will continue for a long time to come. Today, I am thankful that grief has been a teacher of mine, even if I don’t want it to be present in my life.
A week ago I arrived in Florida. I have never spent much time in this state. I am enjoying exploring a new area of the United States. with good friends. I have moved out of my rig for a few weeks to visit with Missy and Dan. I have a bed and my own private refrigerator. Mostly though I have company. I am enjoying that to the utmost.
2017 was the last year Missy and I met in person. I stay west and she stays east in this very large country. We have “zoomed”, texted, and talked on the phone. Oh, and there has also been the occasional e-mail. In this modern world, there are many ways to stay in touch and maintain long-distance friendships. Yet, there is still nothing better than being physically present with a friend.
And…I have my own personal tour guide showing me Florida. We have camped at Myakka State Park, biked (rather hot and hard mountain biking through sand), and walked. Still in the plans are kayaking and more. I am enjoying getting to know this state.
Myakka State Park
The other great joy of being with Missy is that we are both photographers so we are exploring the natural places in this part of the state, the southwest area of Florida with our cameras. It is fun to be with another photographer. It helps me to learn and grow in this craft that I enjoy so much. Missy, being a professional photographer, has much wisdom to share. Click Here to view her website. Her photos are amazing. She also sells Photo Art. Yes indeed, I have a lot to learn from her.
Photo Shoot at the Audobon Rookery
Tiki
The main attraction is a new addition to their household. A week ago Missy and Dan adopted a Ringed Neck Parrot. Tiki is the fascination of the house. We laugh at its antics and celebrate each new step it takes. Any time we are around Tiki the cell phone cameras get busy taking photos. It is no different than having a new baby in the house. Who knew a bird could be so entertaining. And oh my what a pretty bird it is, blues and greens dominate with a pretty red beak.
Endurance-The act, quality, or power of withstanding hardship or stress.
Englewood and the surrounding areas were hit hard by Hurricane Ian. This area remains in recovery mode. My friends and Missy’s parents’ houses were damaged in the storm, although not as bad as others in the community where they live. It is interesting to be here and see the damage that was done. Nature is powerful. It is also interesting to experience the endurance of people. Slowly people are rebuilding. Some have sold their homes. Some are removing the damaged units and replacing them with new homes. Some are repairing. People have lost a lot yet they endure and come back stronger.
After the devastation occurred people in this community showed their caring for each other. They helped each other out. Missy’s brother arrived from Maine to help get his parent’s house back up and in running order. Other people in the community, locally have offered services, supplies, and more. Organizations arrived to offer food, all three meals, while people were without services and busy cleaning up. Others arrived offering drinks. In diversity, the best sides of others often come forward. Humankind wants to help others. I believe that is an inherent trait.
I will remain here for at least another week before I begin the slow trek north to the mid-Atlantic states. It is good for my soul to finally see my east coast family after four years away due to Covid.
Today I am thankful for my friends who love me from a distance and close up. Today I am thankful for friendships that endure. Today I am thankful.
I crossed the Mexico-United States border on Monday, January twenty-third, heading north back to America. I crossed the Nogales, Arizona border and it instantly was cold. What the heck? How did this happen?
Tucson, Arizona was experiencing nighttime temperatures in the high twenties. Its daytime temperatures were in the high forties. Wait a minute, don’t people come south in the winter to get away from the cold? Something is wrong with this scenario.
I immediately knew I could not stay in Tucson. I also knew that the Whitewater Draw (temps down to nineteen degrees F at night) was out of the picture. I did not want to winterize my vehicle.
Winterizing is when you remove all the water from the fresh water tank, the pipes, and the hot water heater. After bypassing the hot water heater the infamous Pink Juice (antifreeze) is added and run through all the pipes in the RV. The hot water heater is closed off. Pink juice is added to the gray and black water tanks. This also means that any water used in the rig, once winterized, has to be carried onboard. If you use the toilet you flush it with pink juice.
To de-winterize, the whole process is reversed. None of this is hard to do. It is time-consuming and I find it to be a small hassle. I, therefore, try my best to not winterize my rig. I am a fair weather RVer.
Yvonne a Social Butterfly
What was I to do? It was late in the afternoon and decisions had to be made. When my friend, Yvonne sent me a message and said I was welcome in Goodyear (the west side of Phoenix) I thought, what a great idea. Temperatures at night were above freezing by a few degrees. Oooh, I get an unexpected moment to visit friends in the Phoenix area, and….Yvonne has a jacuzzi (mmm…..), a shower, a washing machine, and a bed. And so, I was off to Phoenix. Although it added two more hours of driving time it was worth it. I have been enjoying catching up with Yvonne. We are exploring the Phoenix area, and talking, just a wee bit.
On Saturday I move over to the other side of Phoenix (east) to Apache Junction and spend a few days visiting my friend Mary and her animal menagerie. I will be back living in my rig, when I arrive there. I always love returning to my home. I get to nest again and again.
I have the best friends. Every single one is unique and special. They are also kind and compassionate and just good. My friends are always there for me. Since Jim’s death, I have developed the most unique group of friends. Some I have known for years, some since I was a child, and some are new and growing. I have developed true friendships through owning my Roadtrek (tiny home on wheels), hiking and cycling, dancing, photography and more. Most of my long time friends are still with me and we continue to grow and our friendships evolve. I treasure each person I know. I am grateful for each invitation I receive.
I wrote a post on this blog a year ago last July titled “Open Arms“. I think about that post from time to time. Just as my friends open their arms to me, my arms are also wide open to welcome and receive and support my friends. Tiime with friends can be joyous and fun as well as hard and difficult.
Today I am thankful for my friends, acquaintances and even those I don’t know yet. I am grateful how others allow me to learn and grow and experience community. I am thankfull for my family of friends. Even when it is cold outside, they make me feel warm, loved and welcomed.
There are moments in my life when I wish I had a “do-over”. Yesterday was one of those days.
I have a 150 cc Kymco Scooter. Jim and I have owned this scooter since 2006. Both of us were always cautious when riding it. Jim, of course, was always a little more cautious than me. When I am in San Diego I pull the scooter out of storage and enjoy a quick and easy way to get around town. Parking is a breeze. It gets 80 mpg. Most of the year it stays in storage.
Yesterday I had an appointment at one of the Kaiser facilities to have routine lab work drawn. I had this bright idea to ride the scooter. The roads were damp and drying. It had rained during the night. For just a moment I considered not taking it because of the roads but decided that I would be cautious and take it. The weather forecast was good.
I made it twelve miles to the parking structure for the medical offices without incident. As I turned into the structure I hit a wet patch of road and went down. The scooter slid and landed on top of my right leg. If one is going to have an accident having it in the driveway of a medical facility is a good choice. Within seconds two very kind men lifted the scooter off me and stood it out of harm’s way. After a few more seconds there were at least a dozen medical personnel surrounding me. I am sitting on the curb trying to control the need to throw up. When I looked up and saw the staff I asked Susan the nurse representative to get rid of all of them and she did. Within a short time, I had seen a Doctor, not in my plans for the day, and was whisked off for x-rays to make sure I had not broken anything (I did not).
When one lives alone logistics seem harder. I have to figure out many steps that would be so much easier if someone else is around.
I had my labs done, picked up a pain prescription at the pharmacy, and met up with my friend, Phyllis who helped commandeer my day. First stop was the Orthopedic clinic to be out fitted with a knee brace and crutches.
Obviously, I could not drive my scooter. What was I going to do to make sure she was safe and out of harm’s way? I did not feel comfortable leaving her in the parking structure. With the help of the Vespa Scooter Store, I was able to find someone to tow it safely to my storage unit. I felt accomplished when I had found a solution that did not cost me too much money and now I know it is safely tucked away until I can get to her.
My Scooter Getting a Lift
And then there are friends. I value all my friends. My friends have come to my rescue more than once. And then there is Phyllis. Phyllis and I met as nurses at San Diego Children’s Hospital (now known as Rady Children’s Hospital). Over the many years, we have remained strong and true friends. She and I have traveled to Africa and parts of the United States together. If I need someone to help me, Phyllis is my first call. When Jim was receiving chemo and ended up in the ER in the middle of the night due to a temp spike, Phyllis dressed and came to the hospital to support me. She has been in and out of the ER with me numerous times over the years. All I have to do is call and she puts herself into action. She is an amazing person and a tried and true friend. I consider myself extremely fortunate to call her my friend.
The medical staff, all of them at the Vandever clinic were top-notch. I was so impressed with their compassion and kindness and concern. From the moment I hit the ground, literally, professionals were there to help and assist with kindness and compassion, and concern. It reminds me of why I chose to be a registered nurse for twenty-five years.
I am safely tucked into my small rig with a lovely view of Mission Bay. I am doing what I have been told and resting. Leg up, ice packs every hour, and resting. I am thankful for this tiny rig where everything is within reaching distance. I don’t have to go far to cook, get a drink or use the bathroom. And now I wait, giving my leg and knee time to heal. Sigh.
Today I am thankful for not having a fracture. Today I am thankful for Phyllis a good friend. Today I am thankful for Kaiser, the medical staff, and all the loving concern I received. Today I am thankful for the opportunity to have future adventures. Today I am thankful for my little home on wheels that is giving me a safe and comfortable place to heal.
Today I am Thankful. Yes I would still love a do-over.
October sixteenth is my birthday. Since Jim’s death, he died the day after my birthday, this has become an interesting time of year. Sometimes I want to be alone and find peace, other times it feels better to be with other people and friends.
This year, on my birthday, I was visiting with very long-time friends in southern Utah. I have known Sharon since I was a girl. We have remained friends over the years. Friends are marvelous to have. Long-time friends are to be cherished and celebrated.
When Sharon found out that I was celebrating my seventieth birthday while I was visiting, she insisted on making me a cake and a birthday dinner. Not only did she make me a cake but she made my favorite, a Red Velvet Cake with Buttercream Icing. We, her son Michael, Sharon, and I had a wonderful birthday dinner followed by the yummiest cake.
I felt like a kid. I know it was not a birthday party but it felt like it was. Joy bubbled up inside me. I felt young and happy and oh did I feel loved. As I went about my day I giggled to know someone was making me a birthday cake. I kept saying to myself that we were having a party.
It has been many years since someone made me a cake and made me feel important on my birthday. I used to make a chocolate birthday cake for Jim’s birthday each year. He was a Chocoholic. Because his birthday was seven days prior to mine often we were still eating his cake when my day rolled around. He always did special things for me throughout the year and we always acknowledged each other birthdays. Prior to our lives together it had been many years since I had celebrated my birthday.
It takes so little to bring joy into another person’s life. We don’t always know what will trigger that joy. It can be the smallest or grandest of things. Big or small it really doesn’t matter. What does matter, is the recognition by others that you are important enough to be noticed and remembered. Each little thing can make a world of difference in someone’s life. A Birthday Cake made a difference in my life this year.
Today I am thankful for joyfulness. Today I am thankful for Sharon, such a good and dear friend. Today I am thankful for a Red Velvet Birthday Cake.
On Monday I said a fond farewell to my doggy duo and with a bit of melancholy, I climbed in my rig and departed Whidbey Island, Washington for another year. When I travel frequently it is not too hard to say goodbye. After an extended stay and making friends it becomes a bit harder for me to get behind the wheel and leave.
But, leave I must. The daylight hours are shortening here and the smell of fall is in the air. Last week it was cloudy for most of the week and it reminds me that the weather will be changing. And…I have plans.
I am heading south and east. There are plans, good plans ahead for me and three other strong women. In a week, we will meet in Kanab, Utah. I will be leaving my rig behind in safe keeping with friends. The four of us will be heading in high clearance vehicles to camp remote on the north rim of the Grand Canyon in Arizona. And then we will be going to some other unique places in northern Arizona.
I love my rig and I will miss sleeping in it. I also like to camp and get into places that others often don’t choose to reach. It makes it special for those of us who push forward and do the unique and different.
Mary is the leader of the group. She has been to most of these places before. I have been to one of the places that we are going to explore. The country in southern Utah and Arizona is amazing and I love exploring it.
After leaving my friend, Lela’s home and saying a fond farewell to Ellie and Ace the dogs, I drove south to the Clinton/Mukilteo ferry for one last ride for the year. I love ferry travel. I traveled about three hours east and am staying at The Patch, thanks to my membership in Harvest Hosts. Although many know this organization for the wineries where we can camp, tonight I am camping at a Pumpkin farm near Ellensburg, Washington. It is quiet, well except for a few cows and a Great Horned Owl calling nearby.
My Campsite
The Patch is getting ready for their you-pick season this coming Saturday. They are busy and come the weekend the pumpkins will find good homes. I took a moment to walk around the Patch and look at the Pumpkins. I love pumpkins. They have a petting zoo and different games. Tomorrow morning they will open early for me so I can have coffee before I leave. I love finding these places.
Today I will get on the road early-ish and head to Boise where I will meet up with Linda a good friend and fellow adventurer. We will caravan south to meet up with the others in Southern Utah.
I am so grateful for all the opportunities that are offered to me. I am glad to have friends to share them with. I am ready for my next adventure.
When I returned to Whidbey Island, the land of amazing sunsets from my holiday on the Oregon Coast,there was no lovely little brown bird to greet me. Where was my friend of more than a year, the charming and enchanting Song Sparrow, Birdy Boy?
Around this time last year, a lot of the small birds disappeared from the feeders. They were gone, into the bushes and trees to complete their molt. I knew this would happen again, yet I felt sad. I missed my little bird friend.
About twenty-four hours after I returned, there he was. And….he was not alone. He and another sparrow, I am assuming the female, were in the bushes by the feeders and they were feeding other sparrows. OMG, he has a family. There were two or three young ones all pleading to be provided for. He greeted me with a short song and then the whole family disappeared into the shrubbery on the hillside.
I did not see them again for a week. Again, I worried, what if he is not coming back? What if our friendship is over? What if? What if? What if? Oh, the turmoil I put myself through. It is hard to see things leave, that one holds dear.
Birdy BoyFamily MemberFamily MemberFamily MemberBirdy Boy
Sunday the family arrived at the house early. They fed at the feeders and on the ground. Birdy Boy took some time out to sing and talk to me in a nearby bush. As it was last year, he is now more distant. There is no more sitting on my legs or arms yet he comes close and chats and sings to me. Once again my heart is glad.
I know house sitting is a temporary affair. I am not sure where I will be next summer, but when I am here in Greenbank, WA I hope that my little friend will return and we will once again chat and visit like good friends do and I will feel joy.
A week ago I returned To Washington from a week on the Oregon Coast. I took a holiday from my holiday.
Last summer a group of us who own Roadtreks decided it would be fun to meet up on the Oregon coast. It started with the three of us, Mary, Linda and me. We have been friends for years. We rented a group campsite at a state park near Florence, Oregon. As we began to plan, we started to think of others. Campskunk and Sharon spend their summer on the Oregon coast so let’s ask them. What about Pat, who lives on San Juan Island? She was invited. Oh, let’s ask Dorothy, and she came.
Six Roadtreks came and seven people. We had such a good time we decided to do it again this summer. This year we met at Cape Perpetua, another group campsite. Some of the original group could not make it this year so we invited others. Those who could not make it were missed.
Bicycking Bayocean Peninsula State Park near Cape MearasKayaking Beaver Creek
Pat and I left three days early so we could meander our way to Oregon. Both of us are less inclined to drive for hours on end. We had shorter driving days and more time to explore. And our campgrounds were good, some were really good.
Our View Willapa Bay
Bruceport County Park is located on the south side of Willapa Bay. There always seems to be a spot to camp. This time we got the best site. It had an unlimited view of Willapa Bay.
The Blue Heron Creamery in Tillamook, Oregon is a free Harvest Hosts site. It is surrounded by farmland and open to many RVs that come for the night. For those who can indulge, shopping for the wonderful cheeses in the store is a plus.
Beverley Beach State Park is further down the coast and is one of the many State Parks on the coast. A short walk will end at the beach. The Oregon Coast is so pretty.
I would like to say that it is easy to get ready to travel, yet it takes a bit of planning to get my RT ready. That means getting EmmyLou, my rig ready for the trip. Two days before departure the refrigerator is turned on. She got a bath and I did some minor detailing. And just as I think everything is ready to go my engine battery died. Thank goodness for Roadside assistance. She now has a new battery, the DEF fluid was added and she was purring and ready to roll.
It was a delight to meet up with my friends again. This year there were three dogs and one kitty that joined the menagerie. We camped, and talked and caught up on each other’s lives. I got some precious kitty time with Phoebe the Cat. On our one full day, a subgroup of us hiked to Thor’s Well, a natural phenomenon on the coast. We shared stories, food, and more, and then, just like that it was over and we all departed for separate destinations.
Class B’sCampskunk being Walked by PhoebeMary-Thor’s WellPhoebeOur Group
All friendships are special. I like how friends can meet once a year and it is like we have seen each other yesterday. The company is good. The stories are great. And especially in the past few years, it is wonderful to physically meet up with others, see their precious faces, and hear their tales.
The Roadtreking friends’ adventure was not quite over for me. I returned to Washington, stopping before I left Oregon, for a morning kayak north of Waldport, and then returned to Tillamook for another free camping night. After one more night of camping, I joined my friends, Jean and Jim (they own a Roadtrek too) at their lovely home on the Salish Sea, in Washington. I slept in the driveway and enjoyed the view from their home above the water. This part of the Sound faces east and south. In the far distance, one can see the skyline of Seattle. I arrived in time to witness Jean giving Jim a haircut. It bought back memories of Jim, my husband. I used to cut his hair as well. Jean and I talked our way through the afternoon and evening.
Jean & JimThe ViewSeattle SkylineDillon & Finn riding the funicular to the beachChasing Sticks
And then, just like that my adventure was over and I returned to Whidbey Island and the land of the amazing sunsets.
Buying my Roadtrek RV has been a game changer in my life. I bought it on a whim. It has seen me through so much. It helped me drive through the initial grief of the loss of my husband. I have seen some marvelous places and met good and kind people. Mostly though, it has been a friend magnet. I continue to meet such wonderful people. We become more than people passing on the road. We become friends. How wonderful is that?
Today I am thankful for my Roadtrek, EmmyLou, and the amazing people that are now my circle of friends.
If you have read my blog since the spring of 2021 you may recall the unique friendship I developed with a male song sparrow in the spring. Unique friendships are to be treasured.
Upon my arrival on Whidbey Island in June of 2022, Birdy Boy was there to greet me. At first, he was distant and curious. He would hop all around me and keep his distance. By the end of the second day, there he was, sitting on my legs, arms, and shoulders singing away. This year he has only progressed to my head once.
Since breeding season is over he has shown up with a female song sparrow. She is quiet (they don’t sing) and sits a distance away. I wonder if she is trying to figure out about this odd friendship Birdy Boy and I have developed.
You can click on the photo to enlarge it.
Our close friendship continued until this month. When mating season is over things change. Until yesterday the feeders were quiet. Many of the small birds were gone or infrequently visiting the yard. Last year when this happened I grieved for the loss of my birdy friend. I thought he had migrated. After five days he and many of the other small birds reappeared. They had gone to the bushes to molt. All these little birds lose all or most of their feathers one to two times per year.
I believe that Birdy Boy is once again preparing to molt. He is looking a bit disheveled. His feathers are out of sorts. He has a small bald spot on the top of his head. He spends more time in the shrubs. The little birds go there to molt. It creates a safe place for the birds while they are in a more vulnerable state.
Some days he does not show up. At times he comes but keeps his distance. The closeness of spring is gone. This happened last August as well. With the end of the spring and early summer, his habits change.
I reminded myself that this would happen again this year. Even knowing this I miss his presence. He is a central part of my Whidbey Island Experience. I think often about what brings me joy. This little song sparrow brings me joy right to the core of my heart.
Yesterday he appeared early in the day. I was excited to see him. He came to the deck and stood on the chair back and sang away. During the day when I would be outside, he returned. One time he came to my knee and settled in. I love when he quiets down and just hangs out with me. There is no singing, no chitting, we just sit there like long-time friends enjoying the silence and the view out over Puget Sound. After about twenty minutes he flew off into the bushes and that was it for the day. I was pleased he stayed as long as he did. He brings me comfort.
Friendships come in all sizes, shapes and species. I value this friendship as I do all of my friendships. I continue to learn a lot from this little bird. In the quiet of the moments with him, my heart opens up. It is OK to be patient and soft and quiet. It is also OK to be joyous and sing my song and it is fun to share that song with others. Friendships require trust and commitment. I am glad to have shared this with this sweet little brown bird.
Today I am thankful for friendships, trust, quiet, and my friendship with Birdy Boy.
Journeys of Thankfulness 