Taking Rt 89 out of Thistle, Utah

After spending two nights in Provo, Utah and successfully (I thought) fixing my check engine light, I was off to southern Utah. The wind was so strong on I-15 that I decided to once again get off the highways and head for the rural roads. If you ever get a chance take route 89 through Utah. It is an incredibly beautiful ride.

View on Rt 89

This trip seems to have been mostly about reconnecting with long time friends. Sharon and David have been part of my family since I was in junior high school. I used to babysit their children. Sharon has been a good friend, a mother, a counselor, an astrologer and more to me over the ensuing years. She probably knows more about me than most other people, including my sisters. This whole family has been and will continue to be an important part of my life. The first people that I went to visit after Jim died was Sharon and David. I knew that I could seek them out for the love and support I needed when I was at my most vulnerable. And, they loved Jim. And, they continue to love me, unconditionally.

Zion National Park, the East Side

It doesn’t hurt that they live on the western doorstep to Zion National Park. Heh, Heh. What is better than being able to go hike and explore all day and then come home to a hot shower and dinner on the table. It is not bad, not bad at all. Jim and I have spent many wonderful moments with them and in this park. If you have never been to Zion, go. It is an amazingly beautiful place and I highly recommend it.

This visit was even more of a delight because their oldest son, David Jr. and his family, Judith (his wife) and Taylor (their daughter) were visiting. This certainly added a little extra to this visit. I met Judith many years ago when they lived near Mt St. Helens and yes I was visiting when the mountain erupted for the second time. When an event like that happens it is interesting to be with two geologists. Instead of getting in the cars and leaving, we all ran to the top of the hill to get a better view.

David Jr and I have had some adventures in the past.  Even though we stay in touch infrequently, we seem to pick up where we left off at the last meeting. David took me on my first winter camping trip, in the Boundary Waters of northern Minnesota. Dare I mention that we got stuck in a blizzard and spent a night with a lonely couple running a lodge on Lake Superior. David had also met Jim.

David Sr, sitting,
L-R, Taylor, Judith, David Jr., Sharon

This trip I got to meet their daughter, Taylor. I love younger people, they help me see the world through fresh eyes. She is 20 and is quite the talker. I appreciated the moments we had together talking and hiking. It was fun to add to my second family as I have never met her before.

Often when I go to this park I spend my days hiking. This time, I spent much of it helping out. Judith, Taylor and I took the dog and two cats to the vet for Sharon. I want to know why my cat can’t behave like these three animals. This was one of the best trips to the vet I have ever had. Not only did they behave themselves, they really were as content as I have ever seen three animals at the vet.

View from the west side

I did manage to get a hike and a walk in while i was in this magnificent place. It is not unusual to hear the phrase, “this is better than the Grand Canyon”, regarding Zion National Park. This park was always sacred to the Native People. They would often come into this park to gather and do ceremony and then leave at the end of the day. For many of us who visit it over and over again it is a sacred place to us also. Knowing places like this exist helps me to be able to live in a more crowded urban area. And, if you are so inclined-check out The Narrows. Definitely a very cool place.

I am writing this from San Diego. I arrived home last Friday night around 8 pm. I have been a busy woman since I returned. I will tell you more in my next posting.

Jim, Hiking in Zion National Park, Emerald Pools Trail

Big Horn Sheep, Badlands

I  am back in the big open country where the skies go on forever. Since I have last posted I have visited Wisconsin, Minnesota and South Dakota. This morning I am waking up in Buffalo, Wyoming. I am moving towards Cody and then Yellowstone. I decided to take a quick couple of days on the Northern Loop. I am doing a tour into that area in February. I wanted to familiarize myself with this area since it has been years since I have explored that area. Fam trip here I come.

Badlands

I spent a part of Tuesday in Badlands National Park. I camped there and explored the park in the morning. Then a light came on on the dashboard. I spent the rest of the morning in Wall Drug. It was the last place I wanted to be. It is a tourist town. Now I have to reevaluate my opinion of this town. I have infected great toes. I walked into do medical clinic I noticed while talking to Roadtrek Emergency Assist. They saw me right away. I started on antibiotics, thanks to the pharmacy. The Lube place filled my DEF  tank with fluid. The people in this town were extremely helpful. It turned into a very good stop. And…they offer free water. It is how they got started.

Jim & Tammy

Tammy worked with Jim for years. she was the manager of the Counseling Department at Grossmont College. Tammy was more than that to us. Tammy has always been our friend. Since Jim got sick she has stepped forward and offered her help. She drove Jim to appointments when I was out of town. She has even gotten up at those wee early morning hours to drive me to the airport. She always has called Jim “Boss”, even after they retired. They truly had a great affection for each other. Since Jim died Tammy has been major support to me. The day I wanted to pick up the Jim’s ashes she met me at the funeral home as I could not go in. Tammy very rarely ever says no. I love the fact that our friendship has deepened. She has certainly helped offer unconditional support for me. I am so thankful Tammy remains a part of my life. The whole counseling department has been so supportive and helpful to me. Actually the whole college has been supportive. The benefit department took over right after Jim died and took care of some of the initial phone calls I needed to make. Any time I needed help the people at the college have been there for me.

Badlands Sunrise

I continue to be thankful for all the loving support I continue to receive. Each person I interact with or who quietly supports me is remembered. Their energy helps me to move forward with my life. Now it is onto Yellowstone and a good day of exploring the area of the country of big vistas.

Chicago River

Saturday I left Chicago, much more confident than when I drove into the city. I really enjoyed my visit in Chicago with Helen and Norb. I was also ready to get out into the open spaces again. I admire people who can live in the “city”. One thing I learned is when you get up in the morning you look out the widow and up to see what kind of day it is.

Helen

Helen and I have been friends for a long time. We met when we worked together as nurses at San Diego Children’s Hospital. I can’t remember when our friendship established itself, it was so long ago. When she lived in San Diego we started hiking together with the Wednesday in the Mountain Group of the local chapter of the Sierra Club. We found we had even more things in common and attended many lectures, plays and theater over the years. Eventually Helen moved back to the mid-west, Chicago, to be nearer family and to create change in her life. Not too long after she returned she met Norb. They have been happily married for quite a few years. She really has blossomed with this move.

Helen, Norb, Janet, Terry

When Jim died she told me she was coming to San Diego. it was perfect timing. My sister had been with me for almost two weeks. I had about two weeks on my own and then Helen arrived. We didn’t sit around and mope we kept busy and caught up. I love Helen she is so much fun and she really cares about me and that is really all I need to understand. It warms my heart to know that when she found out about Jim,she made a plane reservation while we were on the phone. she didn’t ask me if I wanted her there, she knew and came. Thank you Helen for always being my friend. I look forward to more fun times with you. I appreciate your caring and your love.

Janet &Terry

While I was in the city I also had the opportunity to meet up with another friend, Terry. She is a new friend. We met on the Breast CancerSupport site (bcsupport.org). Terry, Zoe, Jim and I met each other in Washington DC in May 2011. That meeting bonded our friendship. Terry lives in the Chicago area. I was was able to meet her for dinner the first night I was in Chicago. It was so good to see her again. Her life has really taken off and I am so glad to see her happy. The four of us had dinner and we all caught up on the latest happenings in our lives. I am glad I met Terry. She has continued to be a great support for me through breast cancer and through the events with Jim. I am thankful for Terry being in my life.

Chance meetings: Saturday night, September 7, I drove into Wisconsin. I had a wicked headache and it was hot and sticky and I didn’t want to find place to camp. I did my first hotel experience of the trip in the Wisconsin town of Prairie du Sac. I think I found the last room in town as the Iron Man had been that morning. I walked down to the closest local restaurant, green Acres, which was packed. I sat in the bar while I waited for a table. Six people sat down at the same table and the next I knew I joined them for dinner. They told me about the town they are from, Baraboo. They not only invited me to dinner, Jen and Tracy bought my dinner. These moments of kindness touch me deeply, whether they come from a friend or a chance encounter. The best part of this meal was how comfortable we all were with each other. I hope to stay in touch with them.

Traveling WI

WI Bluffs

This morning I drove to Baraboo to explore this little town. The Ringling Brothers Circus got its start in this town. The Circus World Museum is an attraction in this  town. It also had a lovely town square which I explored. The Sunday market was in progress when I arrived.

Amish in Southern WI

I really enjoyed the ride through southern Wisconsin. I once again struck out on the local highways. If you ever have the chance to visit I high recommend Rt 33. I rode through the bluffs and rode the ridges of one of the coulees to the Mississippi. This is Amish country and the farms were so pretty. I even ended up at the end of a parade in the town of Cashton. I really Kline finding the local flavor of these places.

View from my RT

Last night I camped at a very pretty lake outside of Fairmont MI. I woke up to acorns dropping on the roof several times during the night. Once I realized that I was not being attacked by squirrels, I slept through the night.

Today I am in South Dakota and heading west. I have a few more things I want to do and then I am on my way southwest and heading for home.

This morning I was contemplating my life with Jim. What did I learn from these past 21 years. Whew, where do I start? I have not always had the best self image. Jim  always saw more in me than I did in myself. I am my own best critic. After seeing so many on this trip and talking to many others I can longer deny that I am worthy of being cared about. With this recognition come new responsibilities, although I don’t know quite what they are yet. I have time to work that out. There is always the drive this afternoon.

Camping &kayaking on the Colorado

Jim at work

After Jim died I started to plan a Memorial for him, even though he asked me not to. I thought a service might help create closure for those who needed it.

Three friends, Therese, Barbara and Tammy took this project on. Jim and I loved yoga. The first time I went to a class after he died I had one of those “ah ha” moments. I realized that I could not go through with the idea of a service. It was not Jim and it was not me. I put a halt to it before it got too big and  took on a life of it’s own.

Tammy suggested starting a scholarship at Grossmont College in his name. this seemed like such a fine way of honoring him. The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship was founded. Jim had such a dedication to students and his employees and education was a major part of most of his adult life. This felt like a more appropriate way of honoring this very fine man.

Who receives this scholarship? Jim had many interests in life, I decided to focus on 2 of them. I set up this scholarship so that it would alternate recipients. One semester it goes to someone who has committed themselves to an Associate Degree in the Fine Arts. The first scholarship went to a woman who is getting her degree in Theater Costuming. How cool is that. The alternating scholarship Recipient will go to someone who is working towards a Bachelors degree in the Social Sciences. Each scholarship has specific requirements that need to be met.

Jim

I want to attempt to make this a perpetual scholarship. Perpetual means that if I can raise enough money this scholarship will fund itself and will remain in existence long after I have moved on. I like this idea. However, I need to raise $25,000. I have discovered I know nothing about fund raising.

When I had lunch with my friend, Chris, from Philadelphia she suggested that I put this question out to all of my blog readers. Here is my question to all of you. Do know have suggestions on how to fund raise for this worthy cause? I know there have to be fund raisers out there among you. So please step forward and give me your ideas.

If you would like to donate to the scholarship, well you can do that as well. Each time I get notice of someone else who has donated it touches me right to the core of my heart.

Here is the information on how to donate.

To contribute, please make checks payable to:
Grossmont College,
mention this is for The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship

Mail contributions to:
Selam Gebrekristos
Scholarship Specialist
Financial Aid Office
8800 Grossmont College Dr
El Cajon, CA 92020-1799

Contributions are tax deductibles

I want to make sure that each of you realizes that I am not asking for money. I am asking for your ideas and creativity on how to fund raise. I am anxious to see your suggestions. Get your thinking caps on and get those ideas flowing.

Janet & Jim

Salmon Falls

Wednesday I left New England. I did a great drive across the back roads of NY state ending on the shores of Lake Ontario. I have spent the last two nights near Pulaski, New York. Thanks to a new friend, I have seen a few of the sites of this area and enjoyed the company of Pauline, Harris and their dog Nugget.

Janet & Diane

Before I left New England I spent three days with a very long time friend of mine and her family. I met Diane in my first move away from home. I chose to leave the small state of Delaware and moved to Salt Lake City, Utah. Diane and I worked together as nurses. I don’t recall that we were real close friends in Utah, although when I got hepatitis I do remember that she brought me Gatorade. When we both moved to Minnesota our friendship became solid. We hiked, camped and backpacked most summers and had our share of interesting and exciting events along the way. Tom and she have visited Jim and I over the ensuing years. I have had the opportunity to watch her two children grow into fine adults with the same adventuresome spirit their parents have. I have cried on her shoulder a few times and I am very thankful to have someone in my life that I can do that with.

Loon

During the time I visited with them I had the opportunity to hike and kayak with Tom and Diane. It was so enjoyable to be out on the lakes. We got observe some unique loon behavior between the adults and the babies. We also saw some otters. I love my friends who are active. This is what Jim and I did best and I am glad to have friends who also like to be outdoors and enjoy nature.

Covered Bridge

Since I was in Vermont I decided that I wanted to become totally touristy. I went searching for covered bridges to drive my Roadtrek through when possible. If it wasn’t possible then I photographed them instead. It was fun. Diane was my photographer and my guide driving the RT through the bridges.

Each place I go to visit friends I find it so hard to leave. I love having this time to visit with so many. I am thankful for my friends who can take time from their busy lives for me. It touches my heart to know that everyone wants to see me and spend time with me.

Tomorrow, Thursday, I continue to head west. I am feeling a bit of an urge to head home. I was wondering when that might happen.

Loons

Diane, Tom & kayaks

Diane, Karen, Tom