Traditions, Family & the Holiday

Posted on December 23, 2015 by JanetA

Traditions are strong at this time of the year. Do I have a tree? Is it real or fake? Do I buy presents or not? Do I visit family or not? Do I go to any the events around this holiday or am I one to stay home and not participate? What is this all about anyway?

Jim and I were not ones to get too excited about the holidays. We did buy presents and visit family until we wearied of it. It went from gifts for everyone to one Pollyanna gift to none. It was hard as all of us grew older to know what each other wanted. We decided it was more fun to just be with the people we loved and who loved us.

We did have one tradition. Here is probably a little known fact about Jim and myself. We are or were, Star Trek fans from way back, before we knew each other. Several years ago Hallmark started to make Star Trek ornaments, a new one each Christmas. Every year Jim would come home with the new ornament. We hung them all from several strings over my desk in the main part of the house. Some blinked, some made sounds. My two favorites are the Borg Cube that says “Merry Christmas, resistance is futile” and Mr Spock saying “Shuttle craft to Enterprise, shuttle craft to Enterprise, Spock here, Happy Holidays, live long and prosper”. It was a tradition that suited us both and I loved it.

Since Jim’s death I have not felt too much like celebrating Christmas. It is not sadness or depression that makes me feel this way. More than likely it is part of the grief process. It just feels like too much effort. Often the holidays go by without too much notice. This year I did think about getting the ornaments out but then decided, once again, it wasn’t worth the effort. I don’t feel bad about this. I do hope though that one day I might feel festive about the holidays and see the lights blinking again and here the Borg and Mr Spock expressing their own brand of holiday wishes.

This Christmas I will be going to Jim’s family for a couple of nights. They have continued to be a presence in my life. They follow my adventures and call or e-mail. I don’t see them in person very often. The night Jim died I asked them if I would ever hear from them again. I know it sounds awful but when awful things happen the mind plays incredible tricks. They immediately reminded me that no matter what I am family. I am so thankful for them. I needed their stability three years ago. I still need it now.

Mom

Dotty, Jim’s mom, is now in her early 90’s. She is stalwart and delightful. Although she has health issues she remains in her own home and does her life. Her two daughters, Pat and Judy are nearby and support and love her. They are a good family and I am very happy to be a part of them. I have two sisters on the east coast and two sisters on the west coast. Two are by blood and two are by marriage. I see no difference.

Even though I am still defining my “new Life”, there are certain things I am thankful for every day. This week I am thankful for open loving arms that are anxious for me to arrive and for traditions, even when they aren’t celebrated. I believe this helps define and shape me.

I am also grateful for you, all my readers. Elsie the Cat and I wish you the best of holiday traditions. Celebrate the long standing traditions and create new ones.

Live Long and Prosper.

Happy Holidays.

Letters of a Relationship (#1)

Posted on December 18, 2015 by JanetA

Last week I was once again purging my house. This is an event that started with Jim’s death and continues periodically ever since.

With this purge I found a box containing every card or letter I had ever sent to Jim, over the 22 years that I knew him. It also contained Christmas and Birthday cards from members of his family and my sister, Ginny. I sat and read every single one of them. I enjoyed reading them and following our courtship through the ensuing years. It made me feel good.

cards

These letters and cards also held some surprises for me. I would like to share a few of these with you.

I can write. I know you might be surprised to hear me say this, being that I have been blogging for 2 1/2 years. I really never thought of myself as a writer. I have always considered myself as more of a story teller.
I wrote my own poetry to Jim. Some of the poems were not too bad and some were corny and amateurish. They were heart felt.
Our relationship progressed fast. As I read, I realized how quickly we knew that we were ready to commit for the long run.
Both of us were emotionally and intellectually honest one hundred percent of the time.
I was willing to bare my soul to him. I did not seem to have any fear of not being accepted for who I am.
I can be a mush and a romantic. This is not how I would describe myself to anyone, ever, in my whole life.
Some of the cards were funny and punny. We shared a similar sense of humor. That certainly came out in the cards. My humor developed over the course of our relationship and even if it is off color, I exhibit that humor more often now than I ever have before.
Jim brought out a playfulness and joy in me. When I feel safe and loved this trait is released into the world more.

Now I have discarded the letters and cards, except for a handful. Why? I don’t need the physical cards to remember the specialness of the relationship. Every time I speak of him and our relationship, I am expressing the depth of caring and fun we had together. Who I am today is a direct result of being in such a fine relationship for 22 years. And…I am purging.

I also have a box of letters and cards that Jim sent to me. As of right now I have not sat and read all of them. I will hold on to them for a while, yet. These hold a different significance. It helps me to remember what a special person Jim was and how significant and good our relationship was. It also reminds me of how valued and treasured I was by this very good man. When I am feeling sad or a bit down it is good to have a visual reminder of how much I am loved and cared for.

I love the feeling of purging. Everything including myself and the house feels so much lighter. It feels right to do this. I have a long way to go before I can release emotional attachment to my belongings. Each time I purge though, I feel I get a little closer to this goal in my life.

El Cat

Never fear, I will not purge Elsie the cat. She and I are in for the long haul.

Anyone Want a Bed?

Posted on December 5, 2015 by JanetA

Today I sold my bed. Now that is usually not a big deal. You decide that you want to sell it and you put it up for sale and then it is sold. I wish it was that easy.

Here is my reality. I put the bed up for sale on Craigslist. I have received three e-mails in the past week. Today a very nice woman came to look at it and decided to buy it. I instantly went into a panic. Did I want to sell it? Did I want to keep it? The anxiety is so real.

The ad has been on CL for months. When you advertise something on Craigslist it has to be renewed once a week. I always have the chance to not repost it or to take it down. I chose to leave it up.

So where is all the anxiety coming from? I have always known that I wanted to sell my home after Jim died. I still do. I don’t have a time line. It feels as if something is holding me back and I think it is fear of the unknown. Familiar is comfortable. Unfamiliar makes me ask myself many questions: What do I do next? Do I want to stay in San Diego or do I move somewhere else? Where is my life taking me? Where am I taking my life? Arrrgh, the same old questions over and over. Maybe the only way to figure it out is to take the leap.

The bed is the first big item that I am selling. It symbolizes so much. Jim, of course-something to sleep in-the leap into the abyss. Even though I have been anxious about this I decided to move forward with the sale of the bed.

Into the Abyss

Now where do I sleep? Well I do have the tempurpedic mattress so I am reverting to college days and sleeping on the floor. I also have an air mattress that I can use. I am really fine. I hope the anxiety goes away once the bed is removed to it’s new home.

I read and believe in many of the tenants of Buddhism. Letting go of emotional attachment has been on my mind the last few days. This bed is just an object. If I look at this issue of selling my bed, I really find I don’t feel much emotional significance connected to this bed. With it’s disappearance I am saying goodby to the familiar and those many questions, mentioned previously, come a bit closer to the surface.

And…would you like to know the outcome of all this. This woman contacted me last night and told she is not taking it? Now, though I feel more ready and maybe the next offer won’t be so traumatic.

Anyone want a bed?

Giving Thanks

Posted on November 25, 2015 by JanetA

In the fall of 1621 A group of Pilgrims and Wampanoag Indians sat down to celebrate the first harvest. After a winter of almost starvation it was time to celebrate and acknowledge friendship. In 1863 Abraham Lincoln officially declared the third Thursday of November, Thanksgiving.

I have been pondering giving thanks over the past three weeks. Someone recently said that giving thanks is putting gratitude into action. I like the sound of that statement. It resonated within me when it was said. Yet, can I be grateful without giving thanks? Can I give thanks without feeling grateful. I believe the answer is yes to both of these questions. When you bring gratitude and thankfulness together, it becomes a powerful and more complete experience.

This week is Thanksgiving. Many of us will sit down to the traditional turkey dinner. We will celebrate with family and friends and maybe a few strangers.

My Thanksgiving is going to be celebrated in the desert. My friend Nancy and I are heading to the beautiful Anza Borrego State Park to camp, hike and celebrate. I hope to relax a bit, too.

This blog is titled Journeys of Thankfulness. Each day I find that I am thankful for at least one thing. This blog has helped me remember to bring thankfulness and gratitude into my life, daily.

Here a few things that Elsie the Cat and I are thankful for this year.

All of you that follow our adventures. Your comments and sharing moments have helped give me good insight. You have made me feel loved and cared for by people I have, often, never met.
My Roadtrek (RV) that takes me on adventures with a sense of comfort and ease. I love a bed to sleep on at night.
I am so thankful for chiropractors this year. There was one horseback ride to many last spring.
Elsie has been such a buck it up kitty and adjusts to most situations with a lot of ease. I am glad she is my traveling companion.
My friends locally have continued to love and support me. I am so thankful for their on-going presence in my life. I am also very grateful that I am able to find friends that are willing to go on mini-adventures with me.
My father instilled a sense of adventure in me. When we traveled as a family we often explored the back roads. We stayed in some interesting places at night.

Super balls. This is Elsie, I love those small super balls. Janet just bought me a whole bag full. I can’t wait to play with them, under the couch, the chairs and the furniture. It is fun to watch Janet lay down on the floor and get them all back out again.
I am glad that I continue to grow and change through one of the hardest transitions of my life.
I am grateful for the silent presence of Jim in my life. I am learning how to keep his love and move on all at the same time.
I wish I could say I was thankful for the state of the world. It is hard to figure out gratitude when so many suffer. I can’t be thankful for the pain and sorrow yet I can be thankful that there are organizations and individuals who reach out to those in need and help, even when it involves danger.
Lastly I am grateful for a day where I can celebrate gratitude with friends and strangers alike.

Elsie and I want to wish each and everyone of you a Happy Thanksgiving. If you don’t celebrate this day, well we don’t care. We are wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving any way. Elsie says to go out and play with some super balls. You will feel better.

Today and all this week and forever I am thankful for each and every person, who I know now and who I have yet to meet. Happy Thanksgiving.

Elsie, My Mini-Adventure

Posted on November 11, 2015 by JanetA

my latest favorite spot to hang and sleep

Hi everyone, Elsie the Cat here. Lately I have been quiet and let Janet write all the postings. Mainly it is because I haven’t had much to say. I have been spending my days doing what I do best: sleeping, eating, getting petted and going outside where I enjoy the chase of the lizard. They are one of my favorite preys. I hardly ever catch them but the chase is fun and entertaining.

I digress. On Monday, I am happily laying in my favorite window, watching Janet go in and out of the house & in and out of the house, again and again. Now I was suspicious she was going somewhere but I had no idea that what she was doing would involve me. She has gone places since our big outing over the spring and summer but they have not involved me. I am happy about this as I like my routine. You should try the above sometime. Living is good.

Around noon she comes back in the house, picks me up, puts my halter on and the “short leash”. Oh No, the leash is never a good sign. Next thing I know I am in the little house on wheels and we are going somewhere. What??? Janet could have said something.She didn’t even give me a chance to hide or protest.

This house looks familiar and there are all my comfy items; the sheepskin, my litter pan, my food and water bowls, and one of my favorite toys, Miss Piggy. Okay then, let me crawl under the sheepskin and I am ready to roll.

We travel over hill and dale (I am not sure what that means but it sounds good). For a while we drive quietly and then all of a sudden I am bouncing all over the place. I am not sure what that is about but I am hanging on for dear life, under my sheepskin. When we stop and I look outside I know I am not in San Diego anymore.

the Desert

There are miles of nothing, just shrubs and the wind and one of my most favorite things in the whole world “DIRT”!!! I love dirt, I love rolling in it and becoming one with it’s color. Janet took me to the desert. The wild ride was riding on sandy roads to a perfect camp site. Okay I am good with this.

She hooks me up to the short leash and we go walking. She tells me that the short leash is important because there are coyotes here and I would make a tasty little snack. I don’t like the sound of that. I thought all animals got their food from cans. I certainly don’t want to be anyone’s snack. NOPE!!! I am not sure if I remember what coyotes are but if they will eat me, I am good with the short leash.

My climb up the hill and way down there is the RT

We climbed a hill. The wind was blowing a lot and it was kind of chilly. I thought the desert was hot. Not this time. And there were clouds and did I mention the wind? I could not find one lizard. I thought with all these rocks there would be lizards everywhere. Not one. Where do they go?

After our walk, I was ready to snuggle in and look out at the big wide world from my small home. After Janet fed me I snuggled up on the bed and pretended I was in my favorite window at home.

We stayed there all night. The wind blew and it rained. I was very happy to be inside this little house sleeping next to and on top of Janet. There is even heat here so I could be comfortable all night long. It was snuggly and fun.

I like that this little house on wheels is familiar to me. I don’t have to go through it being a first time thing any more. I am becoming a pro. I am glad Janet takes the time to make sure I am comfortable. The one thing I like about being in this little house and on-the-road is that I have Janet all to myself. We bond. When we are in our “sticks and bricks” house, Janet is often busy and goes out a lot. She hasn’t learned to sleep in the window yet. When we are in the little house, she is all mine. She does go out for hikes and stuff but mostly we hang. I like that.

Because the wind was wicked, we headed to the mountains. This morning we are camped in the oaks. Late yesterday afternoon we heard all this howling. Janet said they were coyotes. They sounded like the neighborhood dogs when the fire engines go by. There seemed to be a lot of them. I was glad to be inside. I have decided short leash walks are better than no walks at all.

I remember that sound they make from this summer. I thought and thought and then I remembered that coyote on the land in Colorado. He was just a little thing. I guess what looks harmless is not always true.

Now I am back home and in my favorite window. I am dreaming of that big land of dirt. Even though I don’t mind my routine, well, sometimes it is OK to jump out of the routine and do something adventurous and fun. I am glad Janet helps me do this.

A rainbow kind of morning

I think I will go to sleep now and dream of the next big adventure in this very small cat’s life.

Impermanence

Posted on November 3, 2015 by JanetA

Last week I was driving to an appointment. I was listening to something on the radio that triggered me to emphatically say out loud “Darn it Jim!!!!”. At first I thought it was anger, yet as I focused on this statement I realized it was not anger. It felt more like frustration. As I parked for my appointment I decided to take a few moments and explore this feeling.

What I found frustrating was that Jim had reached a point in his life, on this planet, where he became accepting of his impermanence here and I do not have that understanding. A few days before he died he told me “whatever happens, I am ready for it”. If he got better he would be delighted yet if he got sicker and died he was OK with that as well. For his friends who read this, he also stated that he had seen or spoken to everyone he needed to and he was ready for whatever was next. When he died he was at peace.

Here is what I am trying to figure out. How does someone get to that point in their life? How does someone reach an acceptance and peace. Maybe when you are confronted with the strong possibility that life is near an end the acceptance and peace happens. If that is the case, well, I am definitely not there.

I used to be an RN. I worked with children for most of my career. The outcome of sickness is very individual, yet, I noticed how wise many of these children with cystic fibrosis, cancer and other diseases became, as they approached the end of their short life span. I was not alone in this observation, most of us who worked with them noticed this. I often felt that they became wise old ones by the time they died. They often left me feeling more in touch with my true essence and I felt them to be my teachers.

How do these young ones reach this acceptance? I believe, like Jim, that acceptance and peace arrives as death becomes close. It was as if they lived their whole lives in that short time.

Can someone reach that place without dying? i would like to believe so. Maybe yogis or wise ones understand this, though I am not sure.

This is an interesting topic to contemplate. I don’t find it negative or depressing or anything. I mostly would love to know how to reach that place in my life and remain alive to embrace it and share it with others.

I am glad that Jim was at peace. It was definitely helpful for all of us who loved and knew him. More than anything I wanted him to have peace and acceptance. It helped him to die with such grace. It was an honor to be in his presence.

Three years ago on October 17, 2012, Jim Fenningham died peacefully with those who loved him observing this passing. He was loved.

I miss him still.

And, I am doing OK.

How I Am Doing

Posted on October 21, 2015 by JanetA

Jim & Janet on the lower Colorado

I have managed to get through another birthday and another anniversary of Jim’s death with grace. Since these two dates are 24 hours apart it is hard to mention one without the other. I am not sure that I will ever mark another year without connecting it with the other mark on the calendar. And, it is OK.

I know my last post was about Jim and the scholarship, yet I never thought of mentioning how I am doing. Now that I have been asked by several people, I thought I would try to answer that question here. Since you have been such a faithful audience over the last few years maybe you would like to know and if not, that is fine too.

I am doing OK. Some days, I am doing great, others not as great but not bad either. I am glad to say that I am doing more than just surviving. I would like to think and feel that I am embracing life as much as I can on each given day. Sometimes it is more than others. I, however, am not sitting in my house with the curtains drawn.

Jim and I always embraced life. It was one of the things I liked about him. We were always able to marvel at life and the world. I want to continue doing that. My RV is certainly helping me achieve this. Miss Elsie the cat is also helping me achieve this. All my friends, near and far, help. Everything helps.

Miss Elsie

Grief is a funny thing. There are days when it is strong and there are more days when it is not. Someone once told me that grief softens over time. I would agree with this statement. I like the mental image that creates for me. I am not sure if grief ever completely goes away. Now I am not sure about this because, I am traveling through it and not observing it from afar. Sometimes I think it is gone and then it shows up again. If grief is going to continue to present itself to me in my life then I would like to think there is a way to make it my ally. One definition of an ally is to form or enter into an alliance with. If I can make it an ally I can grow with it and let it teach me and maybe then it won’t grip me so strongly, when it presents itself.

Grief will definitely be a continuing part of my life. As I age things happen to people I know. If fortunate, when I reach the age that my father reached (95) I may know no-one my age as I may be the oldest still around. I wonder as I reach into my 60’s how my parents and friends in their 70’s and 80’s reach an acceptance that death is a natural progression of life. I know that I am not there yet.

If you read this blog, you know what I have been up to in the past year. Traveling is certainly a big part of my life. I love to see what is out there and learn new things. Exploring will certainly continue to be a part of my life. As long as I can move I will venture off to see new places and visit those beloved places as well.

Me * RT

Since Jim’s death I have avoided large groups of people. They have overwhelmed me and I am not comfortable there. This year I have decided to put myself out there a bit more and try out larger groups of people. It is kind of like trying on clothes; if they fit then I may keep them and if they don’t; I will put them back. My first adventure into this realm was riding in the “Bike the Coast” event two weekends ago, in northern San Diego. The biking was fun. After the ride I met two very nice women. We sat in the shade and talked. I felt like this adventure out into the broader world was a success for me.

I want to take advantage of the groups that meet around the greater San Diego area and try them out. It feels like I am also testing out what it feels like to be single. Until this point of time I have not felt single, or married, or widowed. I have been just living and being. I am not sure what being single is, it has been so many years yet, like groups I might just try them on for size and see what if feels like.

This year I want to focus on abundance in my life. I want to know that I am open to abundance in all it’s unique and unusual forms. I want to continue to be thankful for each day and for the people who help support and lift me up. Without all those known and unknown to me who have encourage and supported me I know I would not be as far along as I am in discovering the latest chapter in my life.

Today I am open to receive abundance in my life.

Today I am thankful for making an ally of grief.

Today I am thankful for those who love me and support me, no matter what.

Today I am thankful.

Another Year-Three to be Exact

Posted on October 15, 2015 by JanetA

Jim ready to Fly to Baja

This Saturday, October 17th will mark the third anniversary of Jim’s death. For those of you who don’t know, my husband, Jim died from cancer just past his 60th birthday.

It is a funny thing, sometimes it feels like three years or more and in some ways it feels like yesterday. Henry a friend and fellow runner, Jim was a runner, said last weekend he still expects to see him come around the corner for their Saturday morning run at the beach. There are times I still think he is coming home. I know better yet he still is a presence. Sigh

In lieu of a big celebration to honor his passing, shortly after his death I created a scholarship in his name at Grossmont College where he dedicated most of his work life before retirement.

He originally was the Director of Admissions and Record. He ended his career there as the Dean of Counseling and Student Services. He was absolutely dedicated to the students and his staff. Even when people were upset with decisions he made, I never knew anyone who did not like and respect him.

Usually at this time of the year I send out an annual plea to support this scholarship with your end of the year, tax deductible donations. I am trying to raise $25,000 to create a perpetual scholarship where no one will have to donate again and the scholarship will remain there for a long time to come. The scholarship, in the fall goes to student studying the arts. In the spring it helps a student studying the social sciences.

This year is going to be a bit different and here is why.

Jennifer

Jennifer DeMarco is a friend of mine. She was also Jim’s and my yoga teacher and mentor for several semesters at the college. I can’t even begin to tell you how much she has affected both of us and her other students. She makes them think,change and broaden their thinking. Yoga is not just her job, it is her passion. She is an adjunct professor, meaning she teaches at more than one school and is considered part time and has little to no insurance.

She was recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer and will be having surgery tomorrow, Friday, October 16. Her son has set up a site to raise money to help her with the financial side of dealing with a tough diagnosis. So far they have raised over $9000. However, we all know cancer treatment costs way more than this.

Jennifer DeMarco

This year when you consider gifting, please keep Jennifer in mind, she can use all the support that any of are willing to offer her. Above is a link to the fund raising site. Click on Jennifer’s name to donate to a very good cause, to help a very good person.

If you would like to make an end of the year donation to the Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship, which would be gratefully appreciated, you have two ways to do this.

Click on the GoFundMe button on the left side of the blog page.

To contribute directly to Grossmont College, please make checks payable to:

Foundation for Grossmont & Cuyamaca Colleges (FGCC)
Mention that the contribution is for The Jim Fenningham Memorial Scholarship

Mail contributions to:
Scholarship Specialist
Financial Aid Office
8800 Grossmont College Dr
El Cajon, CA 92020-1799
Tax Deductible Contributions per section 501 (c) (3) of the IRS Code; EIN 45-2692818

You can also donate to both causes. There is no limit to giving. There are so many causes that need help and I know for most of us we have to use our money wisely. My feelings on giving is to give to what you feel most passionate about, but give. If it is a little, good. If it is a significant size donation, good.

It makes a heart feel good to give and it certainly is appreciated.

Serendipity

Posted on October 3, 2015 by JanetA

Serendipity is an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident. An easier description is that when you least expect it really cool things happen.

When my friend, Nancy and I travel together we try to be aware and take advantage of serendipitous moments. We welcome them. It is not always easy to catch those moments, I find I need to pay attention, stop when I was planning to drive straight through, talk to people and enjoy that very moment in time.

We are both members of the Nature Conservancy’s Legacy Club. Once a year they offer us an opportunity to learn about one of their projects in California. We hike and listen to the specialists talk about the projects in the area we are visiting. This year was a bit different yet still very interesting.

Oso Flaco Lake with the Dunes

We explored the Guadalupe-Nipomo Dunes near Pismo Beach. This is not an active project, instead we were able to witness what a mature project looks like. It is open to the public and has some lovely hiking trails. One crosses Oso Flaco Lake, a fresh water lake just on the other side of the dunes from the ocean. It was a birder’s paradise.

We opted to leave a few days prior to the Conservancy hike and explore some areas that we had never been to before. Jalama Beach, 14 miles west of Lompoc, CA, butting up to Vandenberg Air Force Base was our first destination. It is a classic wild California coast line. If you need a lot of things to keep you busy, well this is not it. At the beach there is the campground, a store and grill and…that is about it. I love walking the beach. It is a great spot for sunset photos and checking out the surfers in the early morning. I loved it there. I am already planning a return trip, for a longer stay.

Jalama Beach Sunset

Surfs Up

Walking to the surf Break

Bob Thomas was one of the Conservancy tour participants. He is also the owner of the Arroyo Grande Tortoise and Turtle Rescue. He offered a tour of the rescue facility the day following the Nature Conservancy hike. Serendipity??? You bet. Early the next morning we arrived at this beautiful 5 acre ranch that is currently the home to 300 plus turtles and tortoises. It was a great tour and it was led by Bob who has a passion for these creatures. Every day people bring him or send him their reptiles they cannot own anymore for various reasons. After more than an hour and a half our minds had absorbed more info on these creatures than our brains could hold. We saw big tortoises and little turtles and even a galapagos tortoise. It was a fascinating hour and a half. If you are ever in the area look this Turtle and Tortoise Rescue of Arroyo Grande and take a tour. Tours are by appointment only. They also had alpacas, goats, many birds and the friendliest dogs.

Tortoise & Turtle Ranch

In our quest for free camping in the wilderness, yes there is still wilderness in southern California, we discovered Figueroa Mountain Road out of Los Olives. The road was extremely narrow, frequently steep with little shoulder room, and required cautious driving. There were pull outs in case you met a car coming head on. Thank goodness we did not have to back up, we met very few cars. What a grand ride it was. The views were spectacular and the road was “fun”. You definitely would not have wanted to take anything larger than my sweet little RT on this road.

camping among the oaks

After we crossed the summit of Figueroa Mountain we descended to Sunset Road where we headed north until we found a great National Forest Campground, Davy Brown, in the San Rafael Wilderness. Until late in the evening we were the only ones there. One other group came in and camped at the other end of the campground. Talk about quiet. We camped in the tall oaks and, in spite of the drought, there was a stream flowing next to us. The moon was almost full and it was so delightfully quiet.

The next morning we finished the loop by traveling to Happy Canyon Road. As we maneuvered the twisting road we drove by two large group camps of mostly young men. Shortly after we encountered cars parked along the sides of a steep down grade and more young guys sitting skateboards. As I drove carefully through them we stopped to ask questions about what they were doing there. The Gnarbara, first legally sanctioned down hill skate boarding event on this road, was about to begin. There were participants from all over the world. Most were young, teens and twenties. Many do not do tricks or jumps, they just like to go fast.

After driving the coarse, I parked the RT at the bottom and we hiked back up to the medical tent to watch some of the event unfold. Yes, you heard me right, the medical tent. It is not unusual to treat skin abrasions and broken bones. They had a walkie talkie connected to 911, in case they needed to make the call. Yow!!!!

There were several categories, professional, amateur, hands up (no hands onto the pavement what so ever) and more. Because of time constraints we could not spend the day. We were able to watch the practice runs and some impromptu races. By the time they reached the finish line (no one could quite decide where that was) they may be reaching speeds of 35 mph.

Here is what I have decided. You need to be young to do this event. They are all a bit crazy. If I knew of things like this in my teens and twenties I so would have been there. Now I think about broken bones and hospital bills. While the participants caught the bus back up the hill, we, unfortunately needed to head south and home to San Diego.

This event is the ultimate serendipitous moment. We could have driven by yet instead we stopped and got involved (as observers). We met nice people and watched something that I may never see again. All the young people were great to talk to. They reminded me a lot of surfers in their language and actions. Most of all I had fun. I took pictures and videos and talked to the parents of some of the participants.

Now I am back in San Diego, cleaning my RT out for the second time in less than a month. I am glad I have my small mobile house to see places in comfort and style. I will continue to drive the small byways of California and find the unusual and serendipitous moments with friends and alone. All these moments make me grow as a person. Many of these events make me laugh out loud. Mostly when I come across the unusual I meet the nicest people that care.

Me & my RT in the San Rafael Wilderness

What a joy serendipity is. Got any moments to share?

Serendipity

Posted on October 3, 2015 by JanetA

Serendipity is an aptitude for making desirable discoveries by accident. An easier description is that when you least expect it really cool things happen.