Janet & Helen

Oooh, I am so excited. My friend Helen is coming this afternoon. She lives in Chicago but is doing a brief visit to San Diego to see me. One night does not seem very long but I will take what I can get.

Right after Jim died, Helen arrived in town for a week. She moved in and helped divert me from everything that was going on. We walked the beaches, had lunch and breakfast out and we took Jim’s ashes to some of his favorite places in San Diego. This was done subtly, it looked like we were carrying a big cloth bag. It was fun and helped ease the transition, just a little. I don’t know if Jim appreciated it but I certainly did. Helen is a good and forever friend.

Melissa & Janet

Later this month two more of my friends, Melissa and Dan arrive for a long weekend. I am looking forward to seeing them. Melissa, Helen and I used to hike together. We were the threesome. Now we live far apart and yet we still remain good friends and confidants.

In anticipation of these visits I have been thinking about friendship. There are all types of friendships. Some last a short time, maybe even one encounter and others will stand the proverbial test of time. I am thankful for both types of friendships. These intimate encounters support me and help make me more fully human. It has been very helpful over the past two plus years to have people who have willingly supported  me unconditionally.

Each of my friends brings something unique to the table; art, scrabble, hikes, walks, movies, dinner and much more. With all this activity there are also moments where we talk in depth. All aspects of friendship help me learn and grow. I also appreciate those who make me stay real.

Some friendships are limited and others expand and each of us grows individually. These two women who are visiting this month are certainly in the later category. I am thankful for each of these friendships. I am thankful for each person that enters my world no matter the length of time they are there.

Today I am thankful for Helen. Anxiously awaiting her arrival. Boy do we have a lot to talk about.

Last Sunday in yoga class, Lisa, the teacher, read a quote from a book. To paraphrase it, “Kindness is gratitude in action” I have been pondering this since then. This blog, after all, is titled “Journeys of Thankfulness”.

Not too long ago I was told about an interaction between a reporter and the Dalai Lama. She asked him for a brief reply to what was the most important thing he could tell others. His response was “Be Kind”. That was it. Nothing more, nothing less-just Be Kind.

I have been in “The Valley”, Northridge, for Thanksgiving, spending it with Jim’s family. It was a good holiday. Now I am on my way home on the train. While I was waiting for the train I all of a sudden needed a bathroom, badly. I went in and out of several places and was told no bathroom. Then I went into a laundromat and the bathroom required a quarter which I did not have. The woman who was working gave me a quarter and left. That small act of kindness meant the world to me. She didn’t hesitate, not for second. It has made me ponder Kindness again. One thing I know is that I am so grateful for that small act of kindness when I needed it most.

Does gratefulness generate kindness or does kindness generate gratitude? Hmm…I don’t know the answer to this and as I think about it, it really doesn’t matter. What seems important is the act of Kindness. It doesn’t have to be big or small it just needs to be.

That doesn’t sound so hard to do, right? Ha! I know that for me, when I get caught up in the every dayness of things, sometimes I forget to take the time to “Be Kind”. It takes a little bit of time to be kind, maybe a minute. When I am not in a rush or too wrapped up in whatever I am involved with, I do find that it feels good and right to treat others well and help where I can. Look at the jobs I have had in my life, nurse and tour manager. If I didn’t want to help people I would definitely not be in these kinds of professions. But is helping being kind? I think when it is part of your job, some days it can be hard to do more than just get by. The times I have felt most fulfilled are those day where the interaction with others was heart warming and generous. I know there have been more days where this applied than doing my job by rote.

I do thinking helping is part of the act of kindness. Being mindfully grateful is a part of kindness and that is something I do every day, even when I don’t think about it. I make the choice to spend as many moments as possible noticing what’s good about my day, my surroundings, my life, my family, my friends and myself. In the past 4 years I have been the recipient of much kindness. I am so incredibly grateful for the love and support of friends.

As this season gets started I will hold kindness close and take the time to practice mindfully being kind and mindfully being grateful.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.

Sometimes I have to go find adventure and sometimes adventure finds me. I have been traveling since Tuesday, September 28 in my cute little RT. My goal was to spend the weekend at Cane Ranch, owned by the Grand Canyon Trust to study watercolor with Suze Wolff, the artist in residence. Along the way I was planning to visit with friends and reacquaint myself as a solo traveler in the RV.

Felecity, Center of the Universe

First stop was in the small town of Felicity, CA. There is really not much in Felecity, except the Shell Station and a pyramid. Within the pyramid is a plaque declaring Felecity as the “Center of the World”. Hmmm…very interesting. Unfortunately this day I was not able to go there as I was on my way to meet Kat and the dogs, who are bicycle touring across the USA.

Kat & entourage in Felecity

It was hot in the desert, close to 100 degrees. The original plan was to load up the bike, the dogs and Kat and drive to Yuma. After a couple of cold bottles of water plans changed. Kat rode her bike the last 10 miles to the Welcome to Arizona sign. I became the official sag wagon of her touring. With the dogs on board I drove ahead and met her as she rode into Arizona. Yay. I got to spend the next 24 hours helping Kat with errands. It was fun. The RT continued to be the sag wagon for this adventurous friend and her dogs. In the afternoon we drove across the very hot desert together to Gila Bend. Kat continued her journey southeast and I headed north to Flagstaff. I went from the heat of the desert to the 70’s in Flag. It was so nice to be up in the pines and the fresh mountain air.

Sharon & Janet

For those of you who have been following my blog from the beginning, you might remember that the first stop on the Journeys of Thankfulness, July of 2013, was in Flagstaff to visit my friend Sharon. Remember the photo of the IV bags. She became very sick and I ended up helping her and her family in the hospital. Here is a picture of Sharon a little over a year later. Yay!!! Not only is she doing well but she has returned to her feisty self. I love stories with happy endings. I love stories of my friends with happy endings. I love my friends. I am so thankful for her recovery and that I can still hug and love my friend. We spent my one full day exploring Sunset Crater and Wupatki National Monument. Definitely a must see in the desert southwest.

Cane Ranch-owned by the Grand Canyon Trust

The impetus for this trip was a watercolor workshop that was offered by the Grand Canyon Trust at Cane Ranch. Since Jim was diagnosed with metastasis of his cancer I have stopped painting. I am not sure why. I know that this sometimes happens to people who are going through a major life change. At times of change a person’s life and preferences may shift. I did not know if this was the case with me. I decided to go to Cane Ranch to challenge myself and see if I still wanted to paint. If I decided that I did not want to paint I would just enjoy being in beautiful country.

Painting in my RT

My RT became my art studio for the watercolor weekend. I found that I painted better being away from the group of artists that had come to the ranch for the weekend. I painted looking up the canyon and it was fun. I loved being inside my RT and painting. Why was I inside my RV instead of painting outside?-forty mile per hour winds. Painting inspires my soul and that is still true. I love being challenged each time I sit in front of the canvas. Watercolor is a mystery. I never know how my paintings will turn out. That is one of the joys of this medium. It is fun to watch a painting progress to completion. I have found that it is a good teacher for me. I usually do not like my paintings when they are completed. Later I return to them and think, “hey these are not too bad”.  It is good in my life to often think before acting. Even a few hours can make all the difference in decisions I make. I review the postings on this blog the same way. I save them in a draft when they are done and review them several times before I post them. I find I edit them many times. Maybe the photos change. Maybe the thoughts change. It is OK to take time in my life to ponder change.

First Painting in Progress

Final Painting Completed, Vermillion Cliffs