Category Archives: On the Roll

Exploring Life Changes: A Journey Through Nature

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Near Gold Beach, OR

Returning to San Diego in mid-June has created an odd start to summer. Usually by June, I am somewhere to the north of Southern California. This year I left San Diego at the end of June, still heading north but much later than normal.

I have felt unsettled and not sure which direction I wanted to take my travels. I had thought about heading east to visit family, yet summer is not my favorite time to visit the East Coast. It is hot and sticky. It is somewhere I would rather visit during the shoulder seasons.

Why am I unsettled? I wish I knew the answer to this question. If I knew, then I could fix it or move in the right direction. The uncertainty of the answer is hard for me to understand, emotionally and spiritually. It is about depression, sadness, and loneliness. There is more, and that is undefined to me.

After spending the winter with Drew (healing from surgery) and a whole month with other people during my trip abroad, it is hard to be solidly solo again. It has been nice to visit friends and then spend time alone and then visit friends again. It is the best of all worlds.

I decided to head north. I love the Pacific Northwest with its beautiful long days. The water, the forests, and friends. I love to visit my friends and catch up on the last year. I especially feel so welcome when friends (The Gold Beach and Whidbey Island friends) get excited about me coming and make me feel loved and supported.

As I was trying to figure out where to go, my good friends who live in Boise, Idaho, helped me decide on my summer. They were looking for a cat and a house sitter while they traveled to Europe to visit their son and explore new territory.

I spent a week in Donnelly, Idaho, about 100 miles north of Boise (still in Idaho). I have been to this small town in the mountains before. I really enjoy spending time in the higher mountain country. This year was different. There was so much smoke from the fires in the Pacific Northwest that it made the sun hard to find. It also limited what I wanted to do. I did manage to take the tram up the mountain to attend a free yoga class. I thought if I could get high enough, maybe it would be less smoky.

I have spent most of August in Boise. Misty the kitty has become a joy to be with. I am so glad to be getting an animal fix. It is also interesting to have more time to explore the Boise area.

“I realized before I even arrived that I needed to make myself get out and do things. So what did I do? I found places to explore in the Boise area. One day I went to the Peregrine Fund. For over 50 years, The Peregrine Fund has worked to conserve birds of prey.

Oliver the Owl

“We repopulated a continent with Peregrine Falcons in just 30 years, doubled the population of Critically EndangeredRidgway’ss Hawks in the Dominican Republic, and identified and addressed the cause of the Asian Vulture Crisis in the mid-2000s. Today, we work across five continents on behalf of all 561 raptor species.”

Female Harpy Eagle
India Ink Etching by CC Wari

I was able to meet up close with an Eagle Owl. I got there just in time for the one o’clock introduction of Oliver the Owl. Not only did they have birds of prey, but some of the local artwork within the facility was also amazing.

I realized that I needed some people contact. I looked online at the public library, and each Wednesday there is a group of crafters that meets for two hours. I took my crocheting and decided to give this a chance. I joined them and made a friend. This past Friday Eleanor and I went to the Western Idaho State Fair. It is good to have someone to hang out with.

Karen, a neighbor and friend fo Linda’s, also got in contact with me. We have visited and shared meals out. Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day. It is nice to have Karen up the street, I can walk over for a quick visit.

I have been biking and walking usually each day. When I am in need of life encouragement, being outside helps so much. I met the nicest family while cycling when I stopped at Barber Park to get a drink.

Tomorrow I am officially off cat-sitting duty. My friends arrive home from a trip to Switzerland. Misty the Not-So-Invisible Cat gets to reunite with her peeps. All will be right with the world.

It has taken Misty almost the full three weeks to decide that I am an OK person. Now she follows me around asking for pets and skritches. Cats!

Where am I going from Idaho? I am once again heading west towards the Oregon coast. I have eleven days to arrive in Salinas, CA. My next kitty sitting job awaits. Woody the Cat will need no break in period. He and I have met several times before and he is a love bug.

Elkhorn Slough

It will be nice to be back near the Elkhorn Slough. The kayak is going to get busy. Migratory season is starting so who knows what I will find out there. I love birds, and I love nature. I enjoy exploring the Monterey County area.

As I have begun to mention to others my feelings of dis-settlement and yes a mild depression, I have heard from others that I am not alone. So much is changing in my country. I try to keep politics to a minimum on this site, but there are many things that are happening beyond my control. I know the changes have a lot to do with it, yet I feel the biggest factor is the insensitivity and anger so many seem to carry around with them all the time. It generates a saddness in me that is hard to shake. Sigh.

As the season change, I am getting ready for change too. On Tuesday me and EmmyLou will be rolling west, looking for birds and other wildlife. And I will remain thankful.

Today I am thankful for Misty the Not-So-Invisible Cat. I am thankful for this big wide open country that I call home. I am thankful for all my friends who continue to love and support me as I explore my world.

Today I am Open Arms Thankful.

A Hard Day with my teacher-Grief.

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Eleven years but who is counting? I guess I am. Eleven years ago yesterday Jim, my husband died. Eleven years is sometimes a long time and sometimes it is yesterday.

Morning on the Lake

Yesterday morning I awoke on the shores of Lake of the Ozarks, took my coffee to the water’s edge, and watched a stunning fall morning unfold. This is my reflecting time. I ponder and wonder at the mystery of it all.

Yesterday was a hard day for me, physically. I was exhausted. It wasn’t a normal exhaustion, it was bone-wearying. I could hardly move from my rig to the picnic table. I had all these plans for yesterday. The only thing I accomplished was a languid rambling walk, followed by a nap. I never feel like this, Never. Then I realized grief had shown up once again in my life. It is always in the background somewhere but yesterday it said hello and popped up into the foreground of that moment of my life. If I couldn’t move then I decided not to move. I read and napped and gave myself permission to just be.

I have had six good friends die within the past eight months. That is a lot. I think the grieving I feel for their loss and the loss of Jim made me give up and accept that yesterday I could not be a superhero and I needed to give in to this and love myself. And so I did.

Grief is still a mystery to me. It appears that it is something that will never go away. It just continues to shift and move and mold to the moment. I am learning that it is important to put grief in its appropriate place in my life. Like fear, I wonder if I can make grief my ally. What if I can make this feeling and emotion help me move forward. What if I let grief guide me to a deeper understanding of myself and the world around me and give me guidance on how to support and love others.

When I feel grief to the intensity I did yesterday, a full-body type of grief, I am in the moment, not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow. It is one of the things I remember most about the last days of Jim’s life. He was certainly in the moment and so was I. There was nothing beyond each moment for both of us. It was intensely emotional and heart felt. It almost felt like a blessing to be in its presence.

Janet & Jim in Peru

Today I am back on the road. I have about two weeks until I arrive in San Diego. It is time for my annual check-ups. It is time to visit with friends. Today it is Oklahoma, tomorrow it will probably still be Oklahoma. These are big states. I am enjoying the fall foliage.

Today I am thankful for recognizing grief as a teacher. Today I am thankful for giving myself a break.

Today I am Thankful.

How I Made it to the TransLabrador Highway-Part I

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How did I get to the TransLabrador Highway? After speaking with a friend of mine I realized I have some catching up to do. I have been busy and enjoying exploring places I have never been before.

After the Roadtrek Gathering in Nova Scotia, I returned to Halifax to explore the area just north of the city with my friend Cynthia from San Diego. We went to Cow Bay because well, why not? What is Cow Bay known for? There is a giant sculpture of a Moose that people like to go and see.

After we wandered the beaches and had lunch we returned for an afternoon Scottish Dance.

From that moment on plans changed and they were arranged as I drove. I had an opportunity to participate in a photography workshop to photograph Puffins on the north shore of the Gulf of St Lawrence in Quebec province, Canada. It was a last-minute change. Newfoundland got put on hold and I took about a week to arrive at the workshop.

It was time to visit National Parks in Canada. Definitely a very good experience. I love National and State Parks. Wherever they are, the campsites are private and there is always something to explore. I spent two nights at Kouchibouguac National Park in New Brunswick Canada. I had a great campsite and spending more than one night allowed me the opportunity to explore this park by bike and kayak. It was a place I could return to again for a longer stay. There was a lot to do. And the scenery is amazing.

As I continued to make my way north I spent two nights in Campbellton New Brunswick. Set along the Restigouche River and surrounded by the Appalachian Mountain Range.

The site of 16th- and 17th-century French missions and Scottish fish and lumber trading posts, it was settled by dispossessed ACADIANS in 1757, though most left with the French defeat in the 1760 naval Battle of the RESTIGOUCHE. It received its present name (for Lieutenant-Governor Sir Archibald CAMPBELL) after a post-1825 influx of Scots.

The Province of Quebec is across the river and connected to Campbellton by the J. C. Van Horne Bridge. The community is a hot spot for fly fishing for Atlantic Salmon. It was also a bike-friendly city. When traveling full time there are certain times where checking into an RV park is the best thing to do. I stayed at a lovely park right on the river. And….I got to do my laundry.

The next morning I visited the nearby towns. I could have been in Scotland. I went to McLeods in the morning to visit the Farmers Market. On the way there I passed through the towns of Dundee and Upper Dundee.

And then it was time to get on my bike and explore Campbellton. It is a small city right on the river. There are bike paths that one could travel miles on. It was fun to explore this fishing mecca. It must have not been the right time of the year for the salmon as it was quiet.

Looking down the Restigoushie River

I continued to drive north the long way around. I arrived at my second Canadian National Park in the afternoon. Forillon National Park sits at the end of the road, overlooking the Atlantic Ocean. My heels have been happy so I did quite a bit of hiking at this park. There was so much to see. I loved the wildness of it. On my hike to the lighthouse (5 miles round trip) I saw whales.

Historic Cod plant
Lighthouse at the park
View from the end of the trail

After two days I arose early one morning to drive the four hours to the ferry and prepared to cross the St Lawrence Seaway. I was on my way to Puffin-land. I promise I will tell you more. It was so much fun.

Now the fog is lifting and I think I have covered a lot of territory both physically and writing-wise. I am fine out here in this big wide lonely country. Currently, I am sitting next to the beach where I spent my night. Boondocking is so much fun here.

Today I head south so I can catch my ferry for the next part of the adventure. Newfoundland.

Today I am thankful for my eyes, my ears, my heart, and my spirit that seeks out adventures great and small. It makes my life whole.

Today I am Thankful.

Heading East

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I am on the move. Slowly and steadily I am driving across the southern United States, heading due east.

Sunset over the Salton Sea

After spending three days in Carpenteria, near Santa Barbara, my rig and I were ready to head east. On a rainy California day, I headed east into the desert and the sun. I spent two nights at the Fountain of Youth Spa & RV Resort east of the Salton Sea in the California Desert. It was good to have a few nights to visit with friends and regroup for the long journey east.

The desert is pretty happy at the moment. There has been a lot of water all over the western United States. The flowers were abundant along the roadsides as I traveled to Tucson, Arizona. I am a member of Harvest Hosts and am taking advantage of unique or different places to stay as I progress to Florida. In Tucson I stayed at Envision Wellness, a holistic center offering many different services. I chose to have a half-hour Reiki Treatment. It was nice to have this at the end of a long driving day. And all I had to do was walk to the parking lot to spend the night.

The Arizona Desert

It took me more than two days to drive across Texas. The western half of the state consisted of wide open spaces. The scenery was repetitive and not too interesting. I was thankful to arrive in the Texas Hill Country around Austin. Everything turned green and the wildflowers popped along the roadsides. It was a beautiful drive.

Texas Wildflowers

I am asked what I do to occupy my time while I am driving.

  • A good book helps a lot. Currently, I am listening to Anne Hillerman’s books. I get my books from the Library. If I don’t like one I can quickly send it back and try again. A book has to be quite captivating to hold my interest while I am driving.
  • I ponder, I think about life and all its mysteries. What is next in my life? What is next in everyone’s life? I ponder magic often.
  • Oooh, flowers. I have been pulling over often to enjoy the wildflowers that are growing along the highways.
  • I get out of my rig every few hours, take a walk, do some stretches, and then go to the next spot.
  • If I see a sign that might offer a diversion I will venture off onto the side roads to see what unexpected thing I might see.
  • If I am tired I stop and enjoy the afternoon.
  • And if I am really bored, this doesn’t happen often, I ask Siri to tell me a story or a joke.

Tonight I have reached Louisiana and am tucked into another Harvest Host site. The Vermillionville Living History Center is next to the Bayou Vermillion. The river and the center are my view tonight from the parking lot. It is shaded and quiet. There are about a half dozen RVs parked in the large parking area.

Vermillion Living History Center

Tomorrow I continue east. I am in new territory for me. I have spent little to no time in these southern States. My first impression? Where the heck did all this water come from? I have lived in the western United States for close to forty years. With the exception of this year, water in the west is scarce. It is often described as the true gold of the west. Along the Gulf Coast there is water. Water in the rivers, water in the fields, water behind levees. I have seen ponds and lakes and rivers and more. There is so much water.

In a few more days I will be in Florida, visiting with good friends and exploring new territory. I was a little concerned about this long drive. The flowers have created a good diversion. Such beauty brings me joy.

Today I am thankful for moments of joy and finding interesting places to camp.

Where I Have Been-Where I am Going

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After my last post, I received questions from a few people asking where I am. I am not being a very good blogger because I have not let people know of my continued journey since I left the desert.

By April the desert is warming up. It in fact is getting pretty hot. As much as I love the desert, I am not a lover of extreme heat. I was there later than usual this year. I arrived late so left late. I got to visit good friends, do a little kayaking, and get my desert fix once more.

Mary, Shay & Rocky

I left the desert at the end of March and climbed into the mountains to visit a good friend, Mary from Idylwild, CA. The temperatures cooled off and signs of earlier spring began to show themselves. The daffodils were blooming and a few tulips were popping out as well. I spent a lovely week with Mary and her two dogs, whom I have pet sat for. Shay and Rocky were glad to see me. It was fun to be out walking with them and catching up on Mary’s life. I even had a bed companion, it is fun that Mary is willing to share Shay the dog.

Since then I have been in San Diego. I am camped on Mission Bay. It has been spectacular weather. The days have been sunny and cool and just perfect. I had my follow-up dental visit. I am on course for good healing from surgery. I get a two-month reprieve before I have to return for a dental cleaning. It won’t be in San Diego as I am going to be heading north.

It is not unusual for friends and strangers to ask me what is next. I don’t know, is frequently my answer. I have never been a good planner. It would drive Jim, my husband, nuts. He had a job that required us to plan vacation time. I did not. I know he found it hard to pin me down and it would be a point of frustration. I would breathe and sit down and within a few days, we would have a plan.

I still have a hard time making decisions. I mean, what if something better comes up? Plans do not have to be set in stone and they can change. I remind myself of this when I am struggling to see what is next. It does cause me some anxiety. It helps to breathe through anxiety. The world is not going to fall apart because I don’t have a plan.

On Sunday, April twenty fourth I am leaving San Diego for the summer. First I am going to Santa Barbara, CA for a week. I will be camping on the beach for a few days. Dan Neeley, who works on my rig is just outside of Santa Barbara, to the east. He is all things Roadtrek. Many of us on the west coast head to him for annual maintenance and help with any other issues. After four days on the beach, I will be going to an Airbnb for a few nights just in case my RV has to spend a night at the hospital.

State Street
Mission Santa Barbara
The Beach

Upon leaving Santa Barbara, I return to Salinas and Woody the Cat. He and I will be hanging out for most of May. I am getting a second cat fix. I am looking forward to seeing Mandy and Woody again. It also means I get back out on the Elkhorn Slough in my Kayak. That is a very good thing.

I will continue to head to the Northwest, visiting friends and seeing magical things along the way. I have been asked to house sit for the same owners on Whidbey Island, Washington. I am looking forward to another summer in the Northwest. Hopefully, I will see my little Birdy Boy. I will be back in the land of the magical sunsets over Puget Sound.

Sunset over Puget Sound

And there is my summer. A lot of this came together in a few days. It seems that one moment I had no idea what I was doing after my dental appointments were complete and then it took shape and then I had a plan. That plan goes into action tomorrow when I leave San Diego for the next several months. I will meet up with wonderful friends along the way and I am sure I will meet new ones as well.

It Is Always An Adventure

Getting Ready-Heading South

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After so many months it seems a bit strange to say I am “getting ready to roll”. Yes, the owners are returning to their lovely home on Whidbey Island. My time is up and I am heading south. I am ready for a bit less rain and warmer temperatures. It has been raining a lot lately. One week it rained for almost a whole week straight before the blessed sun returned to the sky and everything dried out.

I have enjoyed my stationary time. Well mostly stationary. I have made a few excursions to the Oregon coast to meet up with friends. After a week away I returned to Whidbey and the house. I also have been to the Olympic Peninsula twice. I love exploring our national parks.

I have lived full time, well mostly, in my tiny RV for more than five years. Staying in one place has been a new experience for me. I have had plenty of time to explore. I have experienced the changing of seasons in the Pacific Northwest. I arrived at the beginning of spring and am leaving halfway through the fall.

For the first time in years, I have experienced changing of the seasons. It started rainy and blustery. As the spring progressed the rain stopped and everything came alive. I discovered when the rain stops in the spring everything greens up and flower season begins. After living in southern California for almost thirty years I thrived on the green here. There are so many tall trees. Walking in the woods smells wonderful. It really helps when that walk often ends at a beach.

This year I got to watch the progression of flower seasons. When I first arrived Daffodils and Tulips were everywhere. I was able to meet up with a good friend and enjoy tulip season in the Skagit Valley. It was breathtaking.

Tulip season folded into Rhododendron season. There was color everywhere. I discover private and public gardens to explore on my walks and bike rides. The east coast lilacs I grew up with competed for attention with the Rhodies. I love lilacs and it was a joy to have them in vases in the house. I would walk downstairs in the morning and smell the lilacs as I entered the living space. What a wonderful smell.

As the season rolled into summer the flowers faded, replaced by green, sunny, warm days. I got my fair share of kayaking, walking, and cycling in. Except for a few days, the temperatures were mild. It was good to be outside.

The flowers made a reappearance this fall when the Dahlias stepped forward to fill the flower void. Oh my, there were dahlias everywhere. They were on display at roadside stands, farms, yards, and even my front yard. I love dahlias. 

I have also seen a progression of birds as the season’s change. Hummingbirds were here and then they were gone, while they raised their young, and then they reappeared. Recently the crows who have been around all summer have disappeared. Where have they gone? I have seen eagles, osprey, sparrows (golden-crowned, song, white-crowned), finches, and flickers. My joy this summer was seeing Harlequin and Pintail Ducks for the first time. I have treasured the birds and the time I have to enjoy them. 

And then, of course, there is my special little brown birdy, who has made me feel so important, special, and unique. I see him every few days. He always acknowledges me. I enjoyed the times that he seems particularly thrilled to see me, flying over to visit and sitting on my foot or leg. I will miss him. I also know he is OK out there in his birdy world. 

I have made friends on Whidbey. One of them, Lela is going to join me for part of the trek south. She owns a Roadtrek RV as well. My neighbors, Robyn and Tom have been such a great resource and a delight. I am glad to have met them. 

All in all, it has been a very good way to spend another Covid summer.

Thank you Jim and Sandy for loaning me your beautiful home with the drop-dead gorgeous sunsets. I will always be grateful for this opportunity. 

Now the days are shorter. It gets dark early in the afternoon and stays dark later in the morning. I find I am longing for the sun and the warmth. It is time to go.

Today I am feeling thankful for the opportunities that present themselves to me. Today I am thankful I can recognize them. Today I am thankful for life.

 

Rounding up the Wagon, Heading South

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Tomorrow, Wednesday, I am reluctantly leaving Idaho for points south. Why? This weekend it is suppose to drop to the teens (F) at night and the temperature is also going to be chilly during the day. I don’t do cold and I don’t do snow. It is time to head south.

A Beautiful Fall Day

It is hard to leave Idaho. I love the country here, yet more importantly, I love my friends Linda and Steve. I have felt safe and secure in their borrowed home about 2 hours north of Boise. I have been in Boise at their full-time home for the past couple of weeks. I have enjoyed the company and the ease of our companionship. We have walked and hiked and talked a lot. Linda and I are both birders so we have been out searching for the birds and enjoying beautiful fall days.

Now it is time to venture south. Before I do, however, I will be heading east and to the Camas Wildlife Refuge to find the Sandhill Cranes. I love them. I follow those birds everywhere. The best part of heading four hours east is… Linda will be taking her Roadtrek and joining me. We are both photographers and bird watchers. It is fun to have company to explore a new area. It is fun to have someone to ooh and ahh with. I am looking forward to the company and the fun.

Sandhill Cranes

Friday I will drive south looking for warmer weather. By the end of the month, I will arrive in San Diego. I will get all my medical and dental checkups done, visit with friends (from a safe distance). No later than January I will head east to the California Desert and points east. It is desert season.

The adventure of my current lifestyle continues. I am getting ready to get on-the-road. I hope you will continue to follow along on my adventures. 

 

 

Uh Oh-Camping Trip Interrupted

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After a brief visit with my Ohio sister, Ruth and my great nephew, Ward, my New Jersey sister, Ginny,  and I left for a camping trip to the east coast and her home.

Well that camping trip did not last long. We camped for one night on a beautiful reservoir that border Ohio and Pennsylvania and then…..being sick happened. I was hit first. We instantly made a decision to head to I-80 and head for home.

 

Here is what I know today.

  • I love my sister, for doing the five plus hours of driving. She never flinched, just got behind the wheel and rolled. (80 on 80 she says). I don’t even want to know.
  • I love the fact I was in an RV. I disappeared to the back and was able to crash on a comfy bed.
  • I love the fact that said RV has a bathroom.
  • I love rest stops on the interstate.

A day later Ginny succumbed. By then we were home and she could retreat to her comfy bed. Then a day later her husband, Frank, succumbed. Ay yi yi. We are all in recovery mode and life is looking a little brighter. Food is beginning to look and taste good and we have survived another sickly adventure in life.

Being sick is no fun. Listening to what my body needs, takes a little attention and agreeing that I don’t need to be strong. There are times that the best thing I can do is crawl into bed and feel sorry for myself and sleep it off. Sometimes it is OK to let others help you out. As a proud and independent person, this is not always easy to admit.

A good thing about family is that we can push past the barriers that one sets for oneself and help each other out. Ginny helped me when I was at my worst. Frank and I helped Ginny when she was at her worst. And the two sisters were there for Frank when he was at his worst.

The real bottom line, here, is IT IS NO FUN BEING SICK. Yet when it does happen it is good to have family and friends close by who are more than willing to jump in and help out.

Hmm, I am getting hungry.😋

The Adventure of the Anxious Traveler

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Navajo National Monument

Since leaving San Diego, I have had a beautiful ride and some nice hikes in my favorite parts of the United States. I have visited friends and helped out where I can. It has been a relaxing and easy time.

As I was crossing the Navajo Reservation, I found, although I was enjoying the scenery, I was anxious. The closer I got to Durango, CO the more my anxiety increased. I tried breathing. I tried diverting my thoughts. And finally I took a Xanax.

Rafting the Animas, Durango

The big question, why was I so anxious? I love this area of Colorado. It has a bit of a feeling of coming home. Why the anxiety?

  • Jim and I bought 45 acres of property here, in 1999. It was going to be our retirement home. We have upgraded the property. For the first couple of years after Jim died I was unable to come to Durango, much less visit the property. Last year I realized that 45 acres was more than I wanted to manage on my own and I put it on the market.
  • I have a good realtor. I have a lawyer that is making sure all my paperwork is in order. I have good friends here who offer to help me any way they can. Yet I find it is hard to let go. I try to keep the emotions out of this sale. It is, at times, hard to do.
  • As I drive across this great country I have a lot of time to think. If I focus too much on the issues with my thyroid and cancer I get a little anxious. Have I made the right choice to wait until fall? How long do I have to live? How long do any of us have to live? Why does the diagnosis of cancer create all these mixed up emotions in anyone? Well aren’t these just a bunch of loaded questions.

Very good friends

What surprises me about anxiety is that it shows up suddenly. I have done little to precipitate it. I would like to tell it to go away. If only it was that easy. On the drive into Durango, I diverted my attention with a qood audio-book. This technique helps a lot. It has to be a captivating book. Stopping to take photos also helps me refocus (sic). I know I can reach out to friends as well. Not that afternoon as I was driving in and out of cell range.

I have been in Durango for two days now. I have had a chance to visit with friends, meet my realtor, and take care of some business. I have gotten one good bike ride in and I am doing better. The anxiety is less, yet I still feel it simmering in the deep backgrounds of my being. I am breathing more, throwing in a little meditation and reminding myself that this is just property and as others have said to me, “it is just business”.

I am choosing to find things to do that bring me joy. That has helped lessen the anxiety a lot. If you have never been to this country, joy to me, is being outside and in nature. I can hike, bike, walk and more. There are lovely stores in town that cry out to be explored. The art galleries are my favorite. I may even go off to the hot springs and soak. There is a lot to do in Durango.

I am more than coping. I am being adult when I need to be and then I can drop that and go off and explore and enjoy my day. I am remembering to breath. It is good to inhale spring at elevation. The sky is clearer and bluer. The mountains are an amazing backdrop. I think I will kick anxiety out the door and go and enjoy my day.

 

 

 

Plans & A Change of Plans

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I am getting ready to become mobile in my Roadtrek with Elsie the Cat. Around this time I start to get questions from  others: What are your plans for this year?” “Where are you going next?” I often hesitate because I really don’t know the answer.

I was hoping to go to mainland Mexico with friends for the winter. The rig is ready, diesel fuel supposedly can be found better on the mainland than Baja, Elsie is set (records and shots are up to date), and then…..

I am staying within a day’s drive of San Diego for the next few months. Why? Yes indeed, why, is a very good question to ask.

Returning to San Diego is always an unknown. Can I come in and get back out without anything too caustic happening? This year I limped in and I am walking out, however, I will be back sooner than planned.

Surgery is pending on my thyroid. A pesky little nodule that was found seven years ago, following a bicycle accident, is growing a bit too fast. It is growing a bit too fast for the endocrinologist and my surgeon and me. The biopsies have been benign and the choice of what to do was left to me. Oh great leave a decision up to a Libra (sic).

After weighing all the alternatives, taking into account my history of breast cancer and my favorite surgeon retiring in a year- I decided now is the time. Now is a relative term. Sometime in the next twelve weeks I will get a call from Kaiser giving me a date for surgery.

Although heading for the desert is my goal-I plan to leave on January 8-the desert is going to be a little closer than originally planned. It is time to rediscover the Anza Borrego and the California desert. Palm Springs is on the agenda, too. When I get “the call” I will be a comfortable day’s drive back to San Diego.

So these are the facts yet the truth is, although I made the decision with wise and good input from people I respect, it is still surgery. If I take the time to let this chain of events into my every day consciousness, I am a bit nervous and unsure.

i don’t know the outcome. I don’t know what surgery will be like. I don’t know what recovery will be like. I know I will need to go on medication. What will that be like?

And even more basic questions involve the logistics. Where am I going to stay? How do  I get to day surgery and how do I get home? Where is Jim when I need him? How do I do this on my own? And the list goes on.

Here is what I do know. I want everyone to support me in the most positive way they can. I don’t want to hear any horror stories. You don’t need to share surgical or medical horrors with me. I already know them, remember I used to be a nurse. I don’t need anyone second guessing my doctors or the medical health care system I am a part of (Kaiser).

Please don’t suggest alternatives. You can trust I have researched them. My full medical team includes all of the above doctors mentions and an acupuncturist, a massage therapist and more. Hopefully I have got it covered.

What you can do is to tell me good stories and good outcomes. Give me a call. Divert my attention. Love me a lot or love me a little.. And if you can’t be positive then be silent and wish me well.

Meanwhile it is time to finish up in San Diego and get some hiking in. I need to find a few slot canyons and, hopefully enjoy a bit of warmer weather. It is time for Miss Elsie to roll in the desert dirt and sand. It is time to adventure into the New Year with as much gusto as I can.

Happy New Year and on to new adventures.