Returning Home, Next trip on the Horizon.

IMG_6409It has been just over two weeks since Elsie and I came back to San Diego. I am home, I think. Living in and near my RT for the past four months makes me have to consider what is home. Elsie, on the other hand had no second thoughts about where she was. She is glad to have no leash attached to her halter.

Returning home for me is always a bit hard. I seem to feel a bit in limbo for a while after a trip. I am not home and I am not away. Where am I? I am not always sure. That is OK. And then there is the yard work…well I just won’t go there.

Miss Elsie, Rolling

Miss Elsie, Rolling

I have been asked if I had a great trip this summer. I am not always sure how to answer this question. Some of it was absolutely delightful and fun. Other times were different. When everything was running as smooth as a well oiled machine the traveling was fun. Most of my days were filled with interest yet there were times that I felt lonely and sad. I missed Jim and his companionship. And…maybe he was traveling with me but it is not the same as having him there in person.  Miss Elsie the Cat helped a lot with the lonely part.

Someone recently called me a road warrior. In some ways that can really describe any of us who take to the road for adventure. I see a warrior is someone who is always ready for whatever the circumstance. This is good and maybe, some times, a bit hard. I see it as vigilance, where I can never let my guard down. Does being vigilant not allow me to relax? I am not sure.

I do believe that I handled myself well in most situations. Stress since Jim has died has been a constant companion. I did’t invite it to be my companion yet for right now it seems to be. I have decided since the end of this trip that I want to handled unexpected situations a bit better. It is just hard sometimes.

There were so many wonderful places I saw. I am glad I traveled the distance I did to tour such wonderful unknown places. There were so many highlights it is hard to list them. Here are a few that stand out:

  • IMG_0423Hells A’Roaring Horse Round-up. This was so much fun. I love horses. I love the west. I love cowboys and cowgirls. For a weekend I got to be a cowgirl and it was fun, REALLY FUN.
  • Traveling through the Nebraska Sand Hill Country.
  • Discovering all kinds of campgrounds, Fairgrounds, Town Parks and parking behind the visitor center.
  • Visiting with my friend, Helen and her husband, Norb in Fish Lake, Indiana.
  • Zoe’s and Kay’s wedding.
  • Traveling to the Roadtrek RV mothership. I was treated so well.
  • Making new friends in Michigan and Penetanguishene, thanks to the Roadtrek Facebook Group.
  • Fourth of July at the lake in NJ. Visiting my family and long time friends.
  • My niece’s wedding. I am not always a fan of weddings. This one was truly fun.

    Loons-can you see the baby?

    Loons-can you see the baby?

  • Hot air ballooning and kayaking in Queechee, VT with more long time friends, Diane and Tom.
  • Chasing loons. It was a major photo shoot for loons. I love them.
  • Visiting with Missy and Dan at Moxie Lake in Maine. I got my very first Zumba lesson. Cool.
  • I really, really liked New Brunswick and Nova Scotia.

 

Mary, a meeting on the Cabot Trail

Mary, a meeting on the Cabot Trail

  • Meeting a long time friend unexpectedly  on the Cabot Trail.
  • Exploring the Cabot Trail and camping on the ocean was a delight. The National Park on Cape Breton was beyond delightful.
  • Anything on the Cape Breton end of Nova Scotia was fun.
  • Biking, kayaking, walking, hiking…well you get the idea.
  • Driving west on the Trans-Canada Highway. Beautiful ride.
  • Meeting so many interesting people along the way. I hope that some of us really do stay in touch. Barbara, hopefully you are reading this.
  • Finally feeling brave enough to go to southwestern Colorado and camping for two nights on my land.

    Colorado Land

    Colorado Land

  • The last week I traveled through southern Colorado from friends to friends to friends. There is nothing better than being able to get hugs and good conversation. I really love all my friends.

Now I am home. I have finally culled the photographs. If you want to view them, click on the link below.

Roadtreking Photos, 2015

Travel is healing for me. I love getting out in nature and I really like exploring places I have always wanted to see. I enjoy meeting new people and learning.

Now I am home. I was hoping that this summer might clarify life for me a little. I am not sure it did. That is OK. Sometimes I get impatient so I am learning patience and enjoying the journey.

I am grateful today for traveling there and back again, safely and mostly happily. I am grateful for everyone who continues to support me. Thank you.

My adventures will continue and you are always welcome to come along. This blog will continue.

Stay tuned for more adventures of Miss Elsie and Janet.

Elsie At Home

Me & My Sheepskin

Me & My Sheepskin

Hi everyone. It took a few days to get to the computer when Janet wasn’t looking. It helps when she works 12 hour days. I am not sure what work is but she tells me that it keeps me in the lifestyle I am used to. OK, I accept that.

I now know what home is.

Home is:

  • where I don’t have to sleep under the sheepskin all day, although it remains close by in case of emergencies.
  • huge compared to the little home on wheels I have been in for the past almost 4 months.
  • where I can go outside during the day without a leash. Yes I do still have to wear my halter and yes I do have to come in before dark each night. I am not sure why I have to do this, but if it lets me go outside without a leash, I’m good.
    filled with windows I can look out anytime I want to.
  • stationary.
  • quiet. There are not as many visitors. A lot of people want to look inside my little mobile home. Then they stay around and talk. I don’t know why they all do this yet Janet seems to like talking to all those strangers.

I have had some grand adventures on this trip. Did you know I got away twice? It was after dark and there was big woods all around. I would have really liked exploring but the first time I heard fear in Janet’s voice. Since I kind of like her when she called and clapped three whole times I ran into the RT. The second time it was really foggy and I could have gone far but a big truck drove up the road and scared me and I ran into the RV. That little home on wheels is one of my safe places.

Here are some of the highlights of my trip.

  • I stayed in two houses, and two hotels.
  • I saw lots and lots of water. Big water and little water. Some tasted kind of salty. Some had waves (that is what Janet called it). Waves scared me.
  • At the very beginning of my trip I saw horses. And…they were right behind my little house. I stayed under the sheepskin for almost four whole days!!!
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Oh no, more horses

  • I met three other kitties on this trip and three dogs.
  • I went to Canada where I learned to speak French, “juste un pue”.
  • I met a lot of wild life, birds and animals. They were all interesting and I really liked the ones that moved fast. I would have really like to have met some of them quite a bit closer but Janet said no. What a spoil sport.
  • On "The Land"

    On “The Land”

    I liked going out on my leash. Every place we stayed was different. I really liked the quiet ones where it was just us. One of the last places we stayed was on “the land”. I am not sure what that means. We were the only ones there and the grasses were super tall and I got to explore in them with my leash. It was fun.

  • Watching the fish in the water at the Lake in NJ was very entertaining.
  • Chippies…Squirrels….Birds…….well you get the idea.
  • I finally got to see a coyote. Janet says I can’t go out after dark because of coyotes. This one did not look threatening. She says they are wiley. I am not sure what that means. They have big voice and yip a bunch. I guess I better stay away from that one.

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  • Janet and I spent quality time together. I liked talking to her and snuggling up next to her on cool nights.
  • I liked riding on the dashboard. I got to see a lot. I tried to not be a back-seat-driver.

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  • I was in 22 states and 4 provinces. That is a lot for a little six pound kitty like me. Just call me, Miss Elsie-Adventure Kitty.

I like both my houses but the big stationary one, is still my favorite. The little one on wheels is also kind of fun and I like being on an adventure. The more I travel in it the more fun it becomes. And I like seeing all the places and animals and “stuff”.

Janet tells me my adventures are not over yet. Hmm, I wonder what that means?

Elsie At Home

Me & My Sheepskin

Me & My Sheepskin

Hi everyone. It took a few days to get to the computer when Janet wasn’t looking. It helps when she works 12 hour days. I am not sure what work is but she tells me that it keeps me in the lifestyle I am used to. OK, I accept that.

I now know what home is.

Home is:

  • where I don’t have to sleep under the sheepskin all day, although it remains close by in case of emergencies.
  • huge compared to the little home on wheels I have been in for the past almost 4 months.
  • where I can go outside during the day without a leash. Yes I do still have to wear my halter and yes I do have to come in before dark each night. I am not sure why I have to do this,  but if it lets me go outside without a leash, I’m good.
  • filled with windows I can look out anytime I want to.
  • stationary.
  • quiet. There are not as many visitors. A lot of people want to look inside my little mobile home. Then they stay around and talk. I don’t know why they all do this yet Janet seems to like talking to all those strangers.

I have had some grand adventures on this trip.  Did you know I got away twice? It was after dark and there was big woods all around. I would have really liked exploring but the first time I heard fear in Janet’s voice. Since I kind of like her when she called and clapped three whole times I ran into the RT. The second time it was really foggy and I could have gone far but a big truck drove up the road and scared me and I ran into the RV. That little home on wheels is one of my safe places.

Here are some of the highlights of my trip.

  • I stayed in two houses, and two hotels.
  • I saw lots and lots of water. Big water and little water. Some tasted kind of salty. Some had waves (that is what Janet called it). Waves scared me.
  • IMG_6487

    Oh No, More Horses

    At the very beginning of my trip I saw horses. And…they were right behind my little house. I stayed under the sheepskin for almost four whole days!!!

  • I met three other kitties on this trip and three dogs.
  • I went to Canada where I learned to speak French, “juste un pue”.
  • I met a lot of wild life, birds and animals. They were all interesting and I really liked the ones that moved fast. I would have really like to have met some of them quite a bit closer but Janet said no. What a spoil sport.
  • On

    On “The Land”

    I liked going out on my leash. Every place we stayed was different. I really liked the quiet ones where it was just us. One of the last places we stayed was on “the land”. I am not sure what that means. We were the only ones there and the grasses were super tall and I got to explore in them with my leash. It was fun.

  • Watching the fish in the water at the Lake in NJ was very entertaining.
  • Chippies…Squirrels….Birds…….well you get the idea.
  • IMG_6475I finally got to see a coyote. Janet says I can’t go out after dark because of coyotes. This one did not look threatening. She says they are wiley. I am not sure what that means. They have big voice and yip a bunch. I guess I better stay away from that one.
  • Janet and I spent quality time together. I liked talking to her and snuggling up next to her on cool nights.
  • IMG_1629I liked riding on the dashboard. I got to see a lot. I tried to not be a back-seat-driver.
  • I was in 22 states and 4 provinces. That is a lot for a little six pound kitty like me. Just call me, Miss Elsie-Adventure Kitty.

I like both my houses but the big stationary one, is still my favorite. The little one on wheels is also kind of fun and I like being on an adventure. The more I travel in it the more fun it becomes. And I like seeing all the places and animals and “stuff”.

Janet tells me my adventures are not over yet. Hmm, I wonder what that means?

Wrapped in the Loving Arms of Friends

Friday morning I left the land and started moving west. It was hard to leave. I have made such good friends in southern Colorado. Deana, Ron and Miss Carrie kept trying to get me to stay longer. I need to return to San Diego, though.

I left the loving support of my Colorado friends, only to arrive in Flagstaff and be swept up into the loving arms of a good friend, Sharon and her extended family.

For thIV fluidsose of you who have been following my blog since it’s conception, you might remember this photo. It was the first stop of the first trip and Sharon ended up in the ICU. It was touch and go for a few days. She made a miraculous recovery and, at 80 is going strong. She is independent and feisty and I love her.

Because I was instrumental in saving her life that morning, her wild extended family has taken me in. I am honored. Her five children are delightful and very different from each other. Her grandchildren and great grandchildren are beyond delightful, so full of life and adventure. Even though they complain about each other, they are tight and love being in each others company.

Sharon & Janet

Sharon a year later

When I went in to give Sharon a hug, a greeting, she announced to me that there would be a fish fry that evening as two of her grandsons had just come back from a very successful fishing trip in San Diego. By the time everyone arrived, ages 8 and up there were at least 15 people in the kitchen. This family, I believe will be eternally grateful to me for helping save their mom. I am eternally grateful to know the delight of a very loving and happy extended family which now includes me. We all save each other.

Sharon, and 2 grandchildren, Jared and Jaimie

Sharon, and 2 grandchildren, Jared and Jaimie

Ken (son), Jared & Jaimie

Ken (son), Jared & Jaimie

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everyone took over the kitchen. At one point of time or another all her extended family has lived with her in this delightful house. They know where everything is and they make themselves feel very at home.

The fish tacos were yummy and the company was better. I loved being swept up in this loud and outgoing group. When I am with them I am definitely part of the family. They tease me and joke with me and I feel so welcomed.

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When I left yesterday morning to head home, I found it hard to leave. I love being loved and supported. I loved the fact that from the smallest one to the oldest, Sharon, I got hugs. I miss hugs. They are grateful and I am grateful. It makes for a great combination.

Seeing my friends from Alamosa, CO through Flagstaff, AZ was a great end to this summer’s journey (Fred & Judy, Deana, Ron, Miss Carrie, Sharon and the whole clan). Friends are wonderful and I have so many fine ones. I can almost weep for the joy of it. Even though I am on my own now, they remind that I truly am not. I am so surrounded by so many each moment of my day.

 

Now I am home and I promise you the postings are not over yet. Elsie is eyeing the computer as I speak.

Today I am beyond grateful for friends…All of Them.

An Update-Janet is Camping on the Property

IMG_6409

Janet, walking the ditch.

I thought I would sneak into southern Colorado, yet, I knew the whole time I could not do this.

I spent yesterday and last night with a good friend. Deana was the realtor who helped Jim and I find this piece of land. Now she is a dear and close friend. After shedding many tears she packed me into her jeep and we drove to the property. It was good to have her support.

The Wetlands

The Wetlands

Oh my it is gorgeous here right now. they have had a very wet spring and early summer and everything is green and lush. The natural wetlands are high with cattails and other moisture loving plants. We were greeted by a hawk who flew out of the cedar trees. It is just a pretty piece of land.

I had lunch yesterday with Miss Carrie and Ron of Ron-d-View Outfitters. Ron leases my property to run his horses and mules on. We spent two hours talking and catching up. It was decided by the end of the meal that I needed to camp on my property. Ron came over in the afternoon with his tractor and a major lawn mower attachment and cut a section of grasses down so I could camp in comfort.

Ron carving out a spot for the RT

 

Deana and Ron

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today I ran errands. I think I was putting off going there until I had nothing to stop me. Around 3 pm I drove over here and am happily ensconced on the land. I was greeted by the summer monsoon thunderstorms. They remained in the distance yet put on a beautiful display. Then I took a nap.

IMG_6418

I am sitting outside at the moment and am enjoying the early evening. Elsie has seen her first deer. Boy did her eyes get big.

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Tomorrow I am going to walk the property and say hello. It is not the most emotionally comfortable I have been on this trip. In fact I find it hard to be here. There were so many plans involved with this place. They were Jim and my plans. I am not feeling yet whether these can become my plans. I miss my buddy.

I am planning to be here tonight and tomorrow night and then I will be on my way to San Diego. It is hard to believe that next week I will be back at work. Thank goodness I enjoy my work.

I want to thank everyone for their support. I am so glad that I have so much support on this continuing journey.

Great Adventures

IMG_0136A few days back I had stopped to fill up the ever hungry gas tank. I met Keith who was filling up his gas tank. He popped over to ask me about my Roadtrek. After touring the RV he told me he had two weeks off between jobs and was driving the Oregon Trail from St Louis to Oregon. What he was really doing was a reconnisance tour.

Keith is 63 years young. He has a deep interest in the history of the settlers who walked west to find a better life, one of new opportunities. Keith is planning to walk the trail, as close as he can to the original trail and is planning to walk it soon. He has investigated handcarts and showed me a photo of one that he thinks will fit his needs. It is made by the Amish. He has mapped his route. Unfortunately I don’t remember his target date but I know it is soon. He plans to camp for free as much as he can and has contacted organizations such as the Elks, and churches.

This man has a plan. I hope he pulls it off. You should have seen his eyes light up as he spoke of this great adventure. I think we all need great adventures in our lives. For some it is traveling to a far reaching destination. For others it may be a walk out the front door. It doesn’t matter what the adventure is. What matters, I feel, is that we reach for the unknown and make it ours.

IMG_0593I have had a lot of adventures in my life, some small and some much larger. One of my great adventures was getting married. Jim and I had a marvelous life together for 21 years. I miss him still. Since his death I am on another grand adventure. Traveling is fun and I have been enjoying seeing so many new places and meeting new people. I don’t think this is the grand adventure. I feel that all this travel is my way of looking for that next great adventure in my life. It frustrates me to not be able to identify it. At the same time it is OK. What is the saying “sometimes it is the journey that is important, not the destination”?

I am not always patient. I am learning to be, thanks to yoga and meditation and learning and being alive this long. Age does help in expanding my conciousness. Sometimes you have to live a while to “get it”, whatever it is.

I am sitting on my mat in the middle of the Piedras Forest in Southern Colorado. I have soaked in the hot springs at Pagosa Hota Springs and by the time I post this I will be on my own mini-adventure.

IMG_8759In 1996 Jim and I bought 45 acres of property in the Four Corners area outside of the town of Durango. We were planning to build a straw bale home, live off the grid and enjoy retirement in southern Colorado.

When we got close to planning our next grand adventure, we kept getting bad news. First breast cancer (Janet) and then salivary gland cancer (Jim) and then the metastasis of the later. Plans had been drawn up and we were slowly working through everything. When we both needed medical treatment, the plans for building came to a stand still.

IMG_8750This is my first trip to the property since Jim died. It has been emotionally very hard for me to think of this land and coming out here to figure out what is next for this property. As I arrived back in the USA from Canada on this current trip, I decided it was time to come south and go sit on the property and figure out what the next step might be. If I can’t figure it out, I at least can say hello to this beautiful piece of property and enjoy it for a few nights.

Nothing needs to be done in haste.

Wish me well on this mini-adventure. I feel that I can use all the support I can get.

IMG_0588 IMG_0137

 

 

 

 

 

When the next grand adventure appears, I hope I can see it for what it is and grab a hold and go along for the ride.

Today I am thankful for grand and mini-adventures. Today I am thankful for my friends. Today I am thankful for all the followers of this blog.

Traveling the Path Home

I have been traveling south and west. I am ready to be heading home. It doesn’t seem like I am taking the most direct route but it has been fun on the journey home.

What makes a good campground? Well the obvious is that it is clean,kept up and the bathrooms have to be well maintained. (my wish list) Sometimes what makes a good campground is the scenery. It can be located in the trees or next to water and lack of traffic noise helps. Sometimes it is the people. Hopefully it is all of the above.

KRCGSIGNFLAGSFour nights ago, I stayed at the Knife River Campground north of Duluth, MN.  It was an unassuming little campground. It was within walking distance of Lake Superior and there was a hiking trail on the river near the campground. Randy the owner was a pretty laid back guy. It took me a while to pay him as he had other things he was doing. There were totems on the property that he had carved. He was working on a ships wheel for a sailing vessel he is restoring. At the entrance is a plane made with spare parts. Yep, Randy did that too.

IMG_6342

Janet & Randy standing next to the Vaffel House that he made

I also met Wendy and Mark who are living in their very own small house on wheels. They have been living in it since Wendy retired a year ago. It is really cute and may be even smaller than my RT.

The Small House

The Small House

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The next morning I joined Randy and John, another camper for breakfast in Duluth before I started to drive south. Both of these men told me I could not miss Decorah, Iowa. I put it in my GPS and headed out.

Two days later I was in Decorah. It is a nice town. There is a college there (Luther College) so I saw a more modern town than what I had been seeing in the mid-west. The Vestenheim Museum was the goal of the visit. It holds historical artifacts regarding the immigration of Norwegians to the USA. It is a very interesting place to visit. I don’t know if I did it justice, because something else of interest caught my attention.

Decorah during Nordic Fest

Decorah during Nordic Fest

Early in this trip someone posted a you tube video of a biking trail in Deocrah. I was planning to try and find it. Then I got busy with weddings and the rest of the trip and forgot about this trail, until I saw a flyer and then I remembered it.

IMG_1778

Beginning of the Trout Run Trail

Beginning of the Trout Run Trail

After finding the Pulpit Campground I got on my biking clothes and checked my tires and got ready to ride. It was really fun trail. It took me out into the countryside, up hill and down. I got to see some beautiful farms and corn fields, lots of corn fields. It was a great ride with a bit of a challenge, on a beautifully kept trail. Half way through the ride there was a  fish hatchery. I met some locals there. Everyone kept thanking me for visiting Iowa.  I guess Iowa is not on everyone’s itinerary. I would go back.

Scenes along the trail

Scenes along the trail

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There were many things you could do in and around Decorah and I found the town to be delightful. I loved getting on my bike.

Now I am pushing west. I am near North Platt Nebraska tonight. It is hot and sticky and I think I may go get in the pool or at least take a walk.

Today I am thankful for events,appearing totally un-related, which bring me full circle and keep me on my path, figuratively and literally.

Elsie’s Animals & Birds

IMG_1743Hey everyone, Elsie the cat here. I took the computer from Janet when she was taking a shower. She says we are on our way home. I’ll believe it when I see it. She keeps finding interesting things to see and do. We keep stopping. Of course she goes off and does things and I sleep under my sheepskin. I like my idea of fun.

Janet says we are in Iowa. I am not sure what that is but when I ride on the dashboard I am now seeing lots of farms. Cows are interesting. They are big and colorful.

There is still a lot of water everywhere. The lakes have gotten smaller and the rivers are a bit bigger. I like that we try to camp in places where I can feel good about going outside. Too many people and a lot of noise does not make me happy and I have to go to the sheepskin to feel safe.

I have been seeing some animals and birds that are interesting. I wish they would get a little closer but they always seem to know where the end of the leash is. Sigh.

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I have seen a lot of these birds, everywhere we have been. Janet tells me they are seagulls. I would like to get to know them better but all they do is scream and fly away. they are kind of noisy. I bet if they got too close I would go to the sheepskin.

IMG_6050 And, speaking of getting to know someone better, several days ago I saw this little guy. I am told by the all knowing one that it is a red squirrel. I would have really like to get to know him and his buddies better. They moved fast and were often just out of my range. Why do they do that? They chirped and yelled at me and I thought they would be a lot of fun to play with. Hmmm, maybe even a snack.

IMG_5930Janet tells me this is a Kildeer. I don’t know the name and I guess I really don’t care. What I like is that they were just outside my little house on wheels. They ran up and down the beach really fast. I wanted to run with them but Janet said no. Sigh. She says they were fishing. What is that I wonder and would I like it?

 

IMG_6373These little birds were covering the bushes outside our RT yesterday morning. They were everywhere. they fly really fast and even soar. I would like to try that soaring thing, it looked fun. I am told by Janet that I don’t have the equipment to do that. I would love to have been right there with them. I bet I could have jumped off the ground and caught at least one of these little buggers. Janet says no and there is the leash issue as well.

IMG_6215I have seen a lot of these. They seem to be at every lake I have been to from New Jersey to Minnesota. They are ducks. They seem like they would be fun to play with too. But when the squawk I get scared and run away. They are loud. I wonder if ducks could be my friends.

IMG_6271A few days ago we were camped on one of the really big lakes. There were trees all around my campsite. these little birds were yelling at me. Why do they yell? Janet says that they must have babies close by. Mmmm, interesting. Would I like babies? I bet I would. A snack maybe? These are chickadees, I am told.

Last night we camped near the Upper Iowa River. In the middle of the night right next to the Roadtrek I heard a loud noise. A big hoot. Janet says it was an owl. It was really close and it was kind of eerie. It was followed by a howl which Janet says was a coyote. It is wild out there at night. I am glad I am safe and snuggled up next to Janet.

We are off for new adventures today. It is raining. Janet has the awning out and it makes it nice for me. I can sit outside and not get wet. The best of all worlds.

I gotta go. She is back and I must pretend I have not been on the computer. Oh look breakfast.

 

Forgiveness Revisited

north shore Lake Superior

 Lake Superior

I am returning to the subject of forgiveness. I have been traveling for quite a few days through miles and miles of forests and lakes. There is nothing out there except forests, water and the Trans-Canada Highway. It gives a woman time to ponder.

There have been times in my life because of something I said or did that I have seen friendships fade away. Sometimes it feels OK and sometimes there is a bit more reckoning that I need to do. I wish forgiveness was an easy process but it always seems so complex. There are times that it is not anyone’s fault that friendships end. They just do. By acknowledging my role in the departure, I choose to not feel angry or hurt. Mostly I am learning not to blame myself and tell myself that I am a bad person. It has taken me over 60 years of my life to understand this and not hurt or feel guilty about it. Mostly I am finally learning to not blame myself for everything. Whew, it has been a long process and I certainly know the learning curve is not over yet.

Sometimes friends come into my life for a short period of time and then we part often with fondness. The end of the friendship is not often spoken of, we just head in different directions. If we see each other again, we greet each other, enjoy some time and then go on our way. Sometimes we never see each other again.

Here is one of the things I don’t understand about forgiveness. Why are some people able to forgive and others not? Why is it important to some and not to others? What is about this act that is so tough and yet can wield such powerful results? What role does religion play in this? I think about the Amish community in Pennsylvania who after a tragic incident at the school, the community went to the wife of the man who killed so many and forgave her and helped her and her children through a difficult time. That took my breath away and it made my heart open. I wonder if I could do this. Hopefully I will never have to know.

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How do I forgive myself? I don’t just look in the mirror and say I forgive you and it is done. I feel that the first step in forgiving myself and others is recognizing that we are all imperfect human beings. Not one of us is without flaws. Maybe then, the first step is to stop expecting so much of ourselves and others. When I can expect less of myself or others then maybe I can begin to forgive myself. I believe that forgiving oneself is where all forgiving starts.

For me, recognizing that I have flaws as well, gives me the freedom to begin to not always blame myself for everything. Part of forgiveness is to acknowledge that I have done everything possible and now I leave it in the universes hands. I am still responsible for cleaning up my act and making sure that I don’t do the same thing again. Maybe the next time I will step back and take more than a moment to assess before I act. Maybe not but I can only hope that would be so.

I find myself grieving for the loss of some friendships. I think grief is a part of letting go and forgiving. At the same time I have begun to feel whole and at peace with this strange thing called relationship. Relationships of any sort are hard. It doesn’t matter if it is a lover, a co-worker or someone you only meet a few times. Relationships are hard!! I can see me still trying to understand and get this point as I age.

I will continue to ponder on forgiveness for a long time to come. Today I am thankful for learning about forgiveness. Today I am grateful for friendships. Today I am grateful that I can still learn and grow and try not to be so hard on myself.

Today I would like to think and feel that I can forgive myself.

The Wandering Kitty Checks In

Elsie le Chat

Elsie le Chat

Bonjour, c’est Elsie le chat. Hee hee. When in Quebec Province I try to speak like the locals. It is hard. I am just a little cat. I find meow is a universal language for us kitties.

Janet and I are on our way west. One day I see the ocean and all that wonderful sand and rock and then next day just trees. Lots and lots of trees. First there was lots and lots of water and now, trees. I wonder what will be next.

IMG_5739We met this woman, Barbara the other day. She was really nice. She came as a package. She had a dog named Spencer. I know Spencer wanted to come in and eat my food but he was good and stayed out. That was probably because he was being watched. When us animals are being watched we are on our best behavior.

At times like this when meeting a dog I am glad to have my little house to hide in. I feel kind of brave looking at dogs, from inside. I watched Spencer come running across the yard. I was hoping he did not see me.

Wow, I cannot believe all the places I have been. Water, any kind of water still makes me nervous. I won’t hide though but I do keep a good watch on it, just in case it does something other than what it normally looks like.

IMG_5844

Boats waiting for water

Boats waiting for water

Today Janet and I drove along a waterway called the St Laurent (St Lawrence Seaway). Now here is what I mean about water. There was no water anywhere. the only thing I saw was mud for miles. Janet said

the tide was out. I am not sure what that means but at least I had an explanation. Boats were just laying on their sides waiting for the water to return. I wonder if it does. It looked like it might be fun to walk around in the mud but there were too many people around and I would have needed a blanket to hide under.

Our trip is not over yet. Janet says we still have places to see but that we are on our way home. I thought this Roadtrek was home. I am a bit confused. Oh well I guess I will just take it one day at a time.

Here is a new place I have found to sleep

Here is a new place I have found to sleep

I have seen amazing things and hope to see some more. When I am not looking around I like to sleep. Us cats do that well. I sleep under the blankets, on my sheepskin (thanks Janet for bringing that) and sometime on the dashboard. It is important for me to get my A’s and D’s.

When things make me nervous hanging behind Janet's leg is a good idea.

When things make me nervous hanging behind Janet’s leg is a good idea.

I am glad to have Janet around. She makes me feel safe most of the time. As caretakers go, she is pretty darn good. I get scratched and petted and played with and no matter where I travel, well that is the most important part. I really like being treated like a princess.

Well I am off to explore the campsite. I will report in soon.